and if i stay the night with you, will it fix me?

The days are longer with out
you, even when the sky is
blue, I only see grey.

I walk in your footsteps,
I remember every step you
took, and I walk them every day.

I never open the bedroom
window, as your scent still
floats around in the air, when
I sleep its like your next to
me even though you are not there.

I look after you, make sure its
tidy where you rest. I miss you
my love but i know your not
gone in some way you'll always
be here with me even though
your not there..

A hope was buried
Deep down in that heart
All it took was liberty
From anxiety
And he rose to the heights
Of triumph

I hope you know you're the reason
The reason for every mark
The reason for every tear

Every memory makes me cry
I was there for you
Always
But you were never here for me

And you said I lied
You said I lied about everything
That everything I told you was a lie
But it wasn't
It never was
I loved you
You were my best friend

But now I sit here broken
My whole body shattered
I can't move
I can't breathe
There are no tears
There is no movement

All I want is the comfort of my blade
I want to wipe out every touch of yours
Every memory
I want them all gone
Every one of them

I hope you know.
I hope you know you're the only reason
The only reason I was happy
The only reason I smiled...
...the only reason I cut

Finding a meaning to live
She lay down in her bed
With a provoking thought
Encouraging her to move on
But thousands of fears
That lay down beside her
Silently
Subtly

Stumbling into the yard,
still blinded by electric light.
I look to the sky,
as so many heroes I've read of  have done,
and try to understand what I'm supposed to see.

I see a set of stars,
bright,
they're pretty,
but that's all I can think of to say.

My neck hurts as I crane to look at the sky,
but I persist.
What am I supposed to be seeing?
this mass universe beyond our atmosphere,
I see nothing but a few stars
that all look like they're Orion's Belt.

The wind rustles,
I feel like it's telling me something,
but what?

A few more stars appear,
I didn't notice them.
more and more and more
as my eyes come to an understanding with the night
and I see it.
The sky is bursting with those lights-
but I still wonder what to think.

Should I feel inspired?
motivated?
awed?
puny?
insignificant ?
powerful?

what is it so many great minds
have seen in the sky
that eludes itself from me?

I never think too deeply about anything,
couldn't, even if I tried.
So I just stand with an aching neck
acknowledging their beauty.

I search and search the sky,
neck becoming stiff,
I see small stars lightly throbbing,
and can only think of how this light
is proof of the stars death.
and then I see it,
a shooting star.
It hits me, it hits me all at once.
My first shooting star.
Something about it,
so bold
and swift
and striking,
there for a moment
and gone before I can blink.

Something about it lifted a weight.
I've always wanted to see one,
and now I have
and I felt something.
I'm not sure what,
but it was definitely something.

Feeling satisfied I go back into my room
and blind myself with yellow and blue light.
I have no idea what I got out of staring into the sky for thirty minutes,
I felt something but I know not what.
I only know that I feel like it helped me in a way,
like the sky had talked to my soul,
like I had been keeping my soul caged up like a bird
when it wanted to fly,
it wanted to say hello to the sky.
I'm not sure how looking to the stars that night helped me,
it just did.

I'm going to look at the stars more often,
as much as I can.
Maybe someday I'll find what so many others have found.
Whether it only ever lets my soul fly
or grants me so much more,
I think we should all look to the sky more often.
In times of joy, or sadness, or tragedy,
look to the sky, day or night,
breath it in
and let your soul fly,
for you might find something more.