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you always say the opposite
But I suppose you only like girls
who are shattered and want to get hurt

you love having your claws gripped deep onto their hips
digging into their skin
making sure that the cuts and the bruises you are creating are in a shape of a heart and that
your claws are so deep in
so that when the blood is dripping onto the ground,
you are facing the ground
smiling
looking at how beautiful it is seeing your name in blood

j.f
 May 2014 Givenchy Ateke
Taylor
to everyone who's calling me....*i am no longer the person you're looking for.
Still breathing but feeling like the dead. Living life on autopilot until I get so anxious i shake.
Grey skies stretch
across the horizon
with no spot of blue.

Here I am left here
on this barren island
& all I can think of is you.

I can smell you in the gale,
you were a tempest,
a force of nature
& I miss you
watching the rain.
at 0:01 begin the pangs of the oceans of longing
****, he's so good at guitar,
her voice fills my heart with tremors
she seems to really understand what it feels like
to choke mouthfuls of salt water while looking for pearls in the sea
and i keep listening because i feel that exquisite pain too:
"i don't want to imagine the words you spoke to her that night"
a feeling i've felt again and again

sad silhouettes form in the corridors of my brain
my pillow soaked with the scent of DIY petrichor
you said you loved the smell of rain, didn't you?
cerulean-stained fingernails glide along the screen,
eyes watering at the green and white,
symbols of bare minimum communication
hoping that the letters will rearrange themselves into different messages,
maybe my vision was fuzzy and i read it wrong
was i too distracted by listening to this song?

i laugh because i feel too high school writing this
but that doesn't make it any less accurate
how's that for self-reflection?
i thought i was done writing these types of poems,
man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajjXrh0c6CU
What we had
was never true yet
you led me into believing you.

Screaming and thrashing;
that's how you left me,
now even sitting near a fire cant warm whats left of me.

I cant fix the pain that bleeds inside of me
because you took away the little
that was left of my sanity.

Normally, I'd say it was a pleasure knowing you.
but can I say that, when you told me that
wasn't the real you?

They told me to move on,
say "***** you" and smile.
"come on, you can do it. yeaah you're strong."

But little do they know, that you were my strength
and now?
Now you're just *gone.
You knew the direction
you would take with me
from the beginning,
taught me everything
between a & z,
and me,
me
the consummate pleaser,
gave you everything
you ever wanted
willingly,
you were no teaser.

You were a sensual master
& I didn't even know it
at the time
like I do now
& now I am stuck
with unquenched desires.

You knew my body
ignited in light breezes
& when
you touched me,
I felt electric.
I tried to fight it
but couldn't,
I still can't.
 Apr 2014 Givenchy Ateke
Liam
my sweet boy is lost to me
or i am lost to him
as it once was
before together we were found
so shall we be
once again
found together
forever


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