it's frightening how quickly
                   your best blessing
                       can become
                   your worst curse.

I catch myself thinking about your lips, again.
And one particular smile; I find it mesmerising.
Wryness and sadness and resolute strength,
That gentle smile, that almost smile, that 'shall I...?' smile.
There's a no-surrender steel to your stare, a hardness
In the set of your shoulders, the tension in your neck,
But your lips are all softness and so, so sweet
I imagine them to be; a piquant sweetness,
Mixed spice, vanilla and burnt sugar.
I catch myself thinking about your lips, again,
And wishing I could taste them.
My fingers to my own, I gently ****,
And lose myself in a cinnamon dream.

I know what its like to be broken. Im full of cracks that my past left behind, and I've had my heart ripped out and shredded in front of me.
I want to kiss all of your wounds, I want to heal the pain from being broken. I can't make it disappear, but I want to help you rebuild.
The same thing you do for me.
That flame isn't going to fade. I've been broken down and abused and tossed aside so many times. I can't go through that again, if I break again, it will be the last time.
Others may make me smile, but no one else has ever made me feel ALIVE. Just your touch makes me feel ways I never thought I'd feel again. You mean more to me than I could ever put into words. I would and I will do anything I have to, so I don't lose you and lose the fire you ignited.
I want to pick up the pieces she left behind and put them together with the pieces of me. Find the way that they all fit together, in disarray and chaos, but they make something beautiful. Something that some people wait a lifetime for and never find.
**** the drugs. I understand what its like to be stuck in its grasp. Its controlled my.life once before. Im not going to let it try to take control again and keep me from something so beautiful. Something I've searched for, that I never thought I would have after Chris died.
I want you, all of you, the good the bad the ****** up and broken.
I'll fight till death to keep that flame from disappearing.