Fading flowers
Earthy beauty
Chaiotic momentum
Ravaging the heart
Missing the fragrance
Heartfelt teardrop
Pouring like a rain

Fading flowers
Waiting on the rain
With a gleeful joy
Playing with the birds
Singing and dancing
Chasing melancholy
Nothing more but happiness

by Jean C Bertrand

The serpentine queue refused to budge.

It were the grown-ups that were stressed
the children babbled showing no unhappiness
with the pause offering so much more to do
and nothing that useful to look forward to.

Some faces looked as though made no sense
this waiting for mundane taxing patience
but were eyes that peered staunchly keen
as if the wait's end God would be seen.

Though lumps of time allowed break from the run
not one face showed up some feeling of the fun
anxious and jittery they smoked up the place
to my mind the children were only saving grace.

The birds raise a cacophony for food
hovering over the river of summer home
washing off flakes of winter memory
in the duck-warm joy of another renewal
bobbing up and down with the waves
like I hold her in my dancing visions
gazing waywardly her way
gauging if somewhere in the ether
hers meets mine
guessing when they do
sparks of fire
will burn the logs
keeping another winter at bay.

I figured my problem
its not depression or anxiety
or insecurity or whatever life throws back at me
its only the change which occurs now & then
making me fearful of what might happen!

People say, if you cannot handle change
You won't be able to grow & thrive your aim.

Strange it is, I do not fear the unknown
rather I fear the known.
I'm very comfortable with
the unknown people or places
but what I am more worried about
is always the fear of known
As known eventually becomes unknown!

So, thought more deeply
to start tomorrow with a tiny tot steps.
I will face every little fear which comes my way
to vanish each of them from my everyday!

Wish me luck as I'm done
procrastinating with my fears
which makes me sick
every now & then!*

- 22nd May, 2017

Lucifer oh Lucifer
you've let me down to-day
as my fire isn't glowing
in its usual heating way

the wood won't catch
alight to make a flame
inside the firebox
activity is rather lame

Lucifer oh Lucifer
where's that tinder glow
that should be on
an orange coal show

something has gone amiss
with the torch's flare
the sound of sparks crackling
are truly rare

Let it be luck or fate
You and I became legends
Us against the world

With each battle,
Enemies came to fight
As allies made appearance

Wars are ongoing
But they hinder
From time to time

Young and optimistic,
We were not yet burdened,
With heavier dilemmas

We enjoyed our time
With each passing season,
Our dreams became bigger

We were the same
But different in pace
We became a comparison

No one warned us
That we could defy
One another

After our first few quarrels
We used the word "forever"
Often as we overcame obstacles

Like poison seeping in
Quarrel after quarrel,
"Forever" fell short of itself

There were more stories
Of us and our memories
Than memories being made

Maturity and experience
Changed everything
From our minds to physicalities

Sharp pain resides in my heart
Orignated from comparisons
I hated everything.

You recieved praise
And lost yourself in it
I lost my voice and will.

Mind tricks of my own doing
Distance flourished
As did I.

We were aware of ourselves
But we expected more too
We were no longer on the same page

Something crashed in us
It left marks and bruises
Left us broken and in pieces

Unsure of what was next
Our blades were drawn
Wounded each other with deceit

Haunted with hate,
You became headstrong
I took myself faraway

Time slowed down
The storm calmed
Everything softened

My sun grew confident again
Beaming from above,
Into what was left of me

The shadow casted
Showed me some truth
My mind cleared and spoke

Aren't we peers,
Or the least bit, equal?
When will you learn?

Look at me.
Who do you see,
If not someone found and free?

Words fled quickly
From my tired being
I justified myself for you (again)

You say you understood
But your skull and bones thick
With stubborn and pride.

Spiteful knives sharpened
By shared secrets and confessions
Tell me what part of me do you target

This new nature you claim
Doesn't not suit you well
But maybe the colors are true

It might be time
To take your turn
And make a realization

Patience is my life
All I have is time
But I'm growing

I am not the pity you see
When you look at me
I am beyond that
and so much more