If i could get my time back
In this world of wonder, I would
But if God wants me to be one of his flock
In the promise paradise, I should

I've been your companion
Since you're a little minion
Taught you the basics
and eventually, how to live life full of sh*ts

Together with your mother
We traveled the world full of wonder
Little by little, you've grown to ponder
Creating memories we'll cherish forever

But as the world seems so perfect
Problems in our life started to inject
I'd known though that this day will happen
So before this day's sad finale
I want to assure that you'd understand true life's lessons

If you've ever felt alone in this world
Just remember the person who'll be there for you instead
The special someone would always be there
Every time, everywhere

I know it's hard to say goodbye
In times we exactly don't know why
But, Child
You know how much i want you to take care
Cause the world can be fascinating
But i'll can hit you until you start grieving

In your life i served as your father
The one who loved you and your sweetest mother
But we all have the time when we needed to go
Leaving each and everyone we'd know
But don't worry dear cause we'll see each other again
In the paradise of the Almighty God, we just don't know when

with a kiss i could absorb your soul
& with a touch you could heal me

There’s a crack in my mug
There's a hole in my mouth
There’s a share for the drug
That’s pulling me south

There’s a spot on my side
Below my left arm
There’s a bruise to my pride
That’s causing me harm

There’s a thought in my head
That won’t go away
Before I am dead
I must have my say

Early in the morning too much caffeine
Haven't slept yet because Im sad at 5:13
All of my friends are away
My brain is washed like ***** clothes
I can't forget how much I miss those days
When I didn't have to worry about
Where to sleep
When to eat

Now all my mistakes are catching up
And running out of breath
My body is weak, I'm hurting inside

I just want to end my life
**** it all **** myself for all I care
Too bad I'm only human
Oh I try and want to believe
But I'm only human
At the morning of 5:13

outside
through the window
circling in blue

five vultures.

I sit here
and look at them
and think:

I am not dead yet.
something is dead or dying out there
but it is not me.

that’s not entirely true.
we are all dying in different stages
on varying timelines.

I might drop dead
on my way to the fridge
to get another beer.

heart attack
a stroke
a lurking aneurysm
a car accident
homicide or
suicide

anything might get me at any second.

sudden death
falling into the final dream
and then

nothing

that
is all one can hope for.

it sure beats
dying slowly
from

lung cancer
heart disease
diabetes
AIDS

or falling off a ladder
while pruning an apple tree
breaking your neck
and slowly

suffocating
to death

while
vultures gather

eager
and hungry

in the
last blue
of late
afternoon.

I am not stupid
Little do some people know
Just because I act

If you crack open my mind
And examine my brain
You'll a find a lot inside
Thoughts
Ideas
Words
But mostly
Hidden feelings
Anxiety, Fear, Love
All trying to make their way
Out
But I don't let them show
Though it destroys me
Inside
I don't mind

I love you
With every bit
Of me
Burning hotter
Than a thousand suns
And lasting longer
Than that thing
Called
Forever

Yet
I don't think
You know
I don't think
You feel the
Same way
I
Do
Because I would
Do anything
For
You
But maybe you'd
Watch me
Burn and shrivel
Turn into ashes
From the intensity
Of my
Own love

I fear losing you
I fear losing me
Anxiety floods over
Like welcome little friend
Every night it comes by
Reminding me
All the
Possibilities
What could happen
Where to go
What would I become

It drives me insane
And makes me
Restless, tired
And dark

If you could only
See my heart
You'd see it beats for you
But bleeds
From scars
I cut because
Of you