Sometimes I wonder,
Should I wander?
Should I leave this world,
Should I become a ghost of my being?

Then I remember,
I already am a ghost.
My memories and feelings are existing too much
too little.  
I'm living,
not living.

I've been having a hard time lately
I'm sorry about that baby.
I close my eyes
And thoughts of what would have been flows by.
I squeeze my eyes to keep from crying.
I've been doing that a lot lately.
I just haven't been the same since I lost the baby.


(a.d)