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eve Jan 2021
i haven't crossed your mind in a long time
but sometimes i hope that you lay down at night
and think of me
wonder what i'm doing
what i look like now
what my new hopes & dreams are
or maybe if i've found someone new
just sometimes
i will always love you
eve Jan 2021
i compare my bipolar disorder
to a roller coaster ride
everything is unexpected
some days i am very happy
while other days i am the opposite
i care too much
or i don't care at all
i am constantly fighting a battle
between who i am
and who my mind wants me to be
it's all in my head, stuck
just some thoughts
eve Jan 2021
you were here
but not for long
i can still smell your scent
from the last hug you gave me
you made november feel
like an eternity full of love,
but for you
was just a blink enough
i remember
your smile,
your style,
your words
which didn't mean anything
nevertheless it was the first thing
i fell in love with
but i'm not mad anymore
i'm healing
at the end i wish you'd understand
everything i said
everything i did
it was never heard or seen
today, nor in november
for my dearest friend s
eve Jan 2021
you
somehow you are in my lucid dreams
& i'm left wanting more sleep
a constant fear of rejection and hurt
even in my dreams
i wish you'd understand
cause you're never really who you are until you're all alone
eve Jan 2021
i was all over the place
thought i was getting better
couldn't see you face-to-face
burning your last letter
i knew the outcome from the start
but i didn't care, not a small part
maybe i'll be happy, that's what i thought

its hard to admit
i just want to be needed, a little bit
never ending up being anyones first choice
day and night missing your low voice
i can't explain why i wrote this. i just started writing and that's the result.

— The End —