I don't express myself
Except for here
Where i put everything
Only to fall on deaf ears
Words written on paper
That no one hears
You'll never never know
Sums up all my fears
Inside the storm rages
But its all here
Written
inside these pages

I love my life

yesterday
in bed i laid
with my best friend's sister
just one of the mistakes i have made

I love my life

I fell in love with my best friend
and maybe i will be until the very end
but even though it may never be returned
at least this much i have earned

I love my life

Geraldean
kindness in a world so mean
My godmother
has now joined my father
she went to heaven
days before i could give her the best news she has ever heard
as they fly across the sky
i cry everytime i see a bird

I love my life

In a world full of bad
and things that make us sad or mad
no matter what
there is something to be had

I love my life

I just want more
Not a lot
Just more than  nothing.

Much more tired than I appear
My mind filled with fear
I hate this time of year
Just when the end is near
Finals are finally here

What would you think of me
if you  knew about my past
every mistake and bad decision
do you think we would last
would it affect your vision  
if you knew about every choice ive made
would you be too afraid

what would you think of me
i wonder
would you think me less of a man
if you knew everything
that made me who i am

how can you expect me to open up
somethings, i can tell you now
will bring doubt of character
so my question is how
how can i tell you
when i'm afraid to lose you

What if i've cheated on a woman
opened up someone else's mail
What if i've even been to jail
how much judgement would you hold
if was so bold
to tell you about the old

if i say that the old me dies
when you look in my eyes
how would you feel about me
old or new
which man would you see
i question what would be your view
if you knew
the man i was
before i fell in love

Everything i am is inside this bottle
I struggle with everything I have to find the bottom
But it seems endless and eternal
As i press my mouth to the lip
I sip from this bottle until i feel myself rip
Everything that dwells in the cavity of my chest
Escapes and leaves me
All the pain happiness and anger
Im left looking in the mirror at a stranger
Everything i was before gone
All i am is only what is left within this last bottle
This soon to be empty vessel now looks as i a feel
As hollow as the world i live in
Empty and cold
But i drink to the contrary
To place scolding and crowded
When I reach bottom of this world
And all that I see in life looks to be hostel
That's when ill know
I have finally reached the bottom of the bottle