Flying through the debris
I'm free
Here I am
I'm free at last
For the worth it will last
Forever and always
In my heart
Forgotten and buried
never to be again
In that nothingness
I WILL FIND YOU
And we will be
As we were
Always
Always meant to be
You and I
So high
In the sky
Amongst the stars
Feel my scars
Drink my pain
Feed my heart
I've been lonely
Yours only
For so far
Who we are
What we became
With every hour
And like shards
Sharks
and all the things between
It's all just an ocean
Always has been
So loved
So broken
So vile
Like you and I
So alive  
It's all a lie
Do not dream
Do not scream
Do not close your eyes
Fight
Fight the urge
Purge
On your instincts
Let yourself be
For this while
Do not hide
Do not fight
It'll be alright
Like I tell myself
Every night
Everything still feels the same
Even though
So many tears have passed
In so many years
Those couldn't last
I never asked
While I was breathing
Was it ever meant to last
For the worth it will last
It'll be mine to keep
Mine to breed
And feed
To be freed
This greed
Will bleed
And tear my heart in to pieces
Two pieces
Because that's all I have
One half of my own
More alone
Than you  could ever be
And you still can't see
You can't recall my face
Remember that place
That time
When you were blind
And I saw you
Through the debris

The funny thing is it wasn't always this way
As if he was forced from his bed
Kicked out by the thing he craves.
Reason tells him it's okay
That it's all in his head
And that she is lying there safe.

But try telling that to his heart
Convinced of its own reality
with each beat in his shirt
Drenched in a cold hyperbole.

So he'll trade his sleep away
To take up the night watch
As if he can offer an ounce of assurance
In hopes of keeping his dream
from becoming
A nightmare.

Her hair moves effortlessly in the wind
and all you want to do is touch her
but she's too far away to even reach for her hand.
You swear her smile
could cure diseases or end hurricanes
or make your heart beat out of your chest.
You imagine she tastes like sunlight,
that if you had the pleasure to touch her
you would be left with stardust
on the palms of your hands.
When you wake up,
you will be alone in the wind
and her voice will be gone.
You don't like the way the song goes
but your fingertips will be hitting
piano keys in the hopes that
the notes will fill the silence
or maybe the hole in your chest
where your heart used to be.

He tells himself that one day
he’ll be with the woman that he loves
but he will have to fix himself first.
He leaves her shaking on the bathroom floor
because he can’t stop his own hands from trembling
and he doesn’t think he’s capable
of picking up all of her broken pieces
when he is still slicing open his fingertips
trying to clean up his own mess.
His story isn’t one you would tell your children
because it isn’t one that ends happily.
Years later her long hair still appears in his dreams
and he can’t bring himself to listen to his favorite music anymore
because he swears he can hear her laughter in every tune.
He buries himself in other girls
whose eyes don’t shine nearly as brightly as hers used to
and he drinks whiskey every night
in the hopes of forgetting her name,
but he is afraid he will end up forgetting his own first.

From youth, not unlike the love
I received from my family, I surmised,
that extended love might be everywhere.
With artless, open arms and heart,
I embraced this simple notion.
In time, sadly this childish wish
was honed to a hard truth by maturation.

Friends and loves come
and go, fleeting in heart,
and committed soul.
Unreliably, flowing in and ebbing out,
like deep undulations of an ocean,
all too often with sneaker waves
that pull us under. Breakers pushing
our ship onto the rocks, in a sea
of shallow unfulfilled expectations.
Encounters becoming disappointment,
with too many frogs kissed.

My educated suspicion is,
beyond our family of blood kin,
Faithful canine love is the only
other "truly committed devotion"
we are likely to get.

In the end, that may well be enough.
Perspective wisdom can be a bitter lesson.

light me up, like a candle
i will drip for you tonight
touch me with your burning skin
i will melt in your hands tonight
ignite me with your mind
i'll be a puddle in your lap tonight