David Bojay: Favorites

Apr 2014 David Bojay

Megan May

Write me the words
The words of your soul
Show me your heart
Blistered and broken
Sing me the melody
Of your deep and tragic past
Read to me
The emotions that are too hard to express
Try to make me understand
The things you've gone through,
Witnessed,
Relived a hundred thousand times
Then I will know
The depths of your being
And put the pieces back in place
So you can finally be whole again.

#love #broken #words #peace #hope #fixing

Apr 2014 David Bojay

Loud Lullaby; Quiet Mountain

Apr 2014 David Bojay

Courtney Snodgrass

Loud Lullaby; Quiet Mountain

The first night you stayed in my bed until the sun rose the next morning,
I was afraid to fall asleep out of fear that you wouldn’t be by my side
When I awoke the next day.
I lay on my side, you on your back, and my cheek on your bare chest.
I listened to your heartbeat like a loud lullaby trying to pull me to sleep.
I watched your eyelids, waiting for them to crack to see if I had fallen to slumber
But they never did.
Your chest elevated up and parachuted down in a perfect sync
With the heartbeat drumming in my ear.
Occasionally, I walked my fingertips softly up your chest as if your body were a mountain
And my fingers were hikers exploring your beauty and landscape.

I like certain lines in this poem and others, I hate. Trying to decide if I should add more to it. Let me know what you guys think.

#love #poetry #relationships

Apr 2014 David Bojay

A Smiles Symphony

Apr 2014 David Bojay

Wendell A Brown

A Smiles Symphony

There is a genuine beauty found
Which is a great part of my day
And what makes it so very special
Is your love sent its smile my way

A genuine beauty is a rare prize
For one alone to solely possess
When endowed with awesome power
To bring alive lasting happiness

Yet I find myself to be the luckiest
When with each new day I am able to see
Another breathtaking beautiful morning
Embraced by your smiles sweet symphony

For what's found very deep in its spirit
Lovingly leaves its radiance upon my face
So if one could really see inside of me
They'll know your smile can never be erased.

Being thankful

Apr 2014 David Bojay

I'm Done With Dancing

Apr 2014 David Bojay

suicidalsmiles

I'm Done With Dancing

I want to evaporate
Disappear into the great
Black obysss.
Into the night sky
So clear and sure
Twinkling and sparkling
Moon dust in my hair
I dance with death,
He spins me and twirls me.
He's my puppet master
He's dangling my life
By a silken shimmering silver thread.
He kisses my neck,
And my chapped parted lips
Forever screaming silent pleas
Someone, anyone,
Save me from the nothing
I've slowly become.
I'm done with dancing,
I've grown to tired to keep going,
Take me with death.
I'm done with dancing.
My heart aches and yearns,
For a past that will never return.
A life I can never have,
A family I've lost,
Somewhere in this journey.
I'm done with dancing.
My mind bleeds
Forever asking me why do stay.
It'd be so easy. To just slip away.
To forget the reasons why,
I should never pull the trigger.
And be selfish. And just do it.
I'm done with dancing.
My soul is screaming and careening.
I don't know who I am anymore.
I've lost my way and myself.
I'm tortured by demons
Ever present. Ever there.
Whispering in my ear,
They tell me what to do.
I'm done with dancing.
I shake the moon dust from my hair.
It'll melt in hell anyway.

:/

Apr 2014 David Bojay

So Help Me God

Apr 2014 David Bojay

Carl Joseph Roberts

So Help Me God

On a busy downtown corner
As the traffic passes by
Stands a man with a cardboard sign
Can't seem to look me in the eye

But he's going to live, forever, somewhere
So help me God
I've got to show him
How much you care

At a big bank on wall street
With its fancy marble floors
Walks in a man in a business suit
As his chauffeur holds the door

But he's going to live, forever, somewhere
So help me God
I've got to show him
How much you care

Every face that I pass by
I see you on the cross
Bearing all our guilt and sin
Not one of us should be lost

I'm going to take this message
Of love that I've found
And somehow share it with this world
So help me God

In a courtroom with its wooden chairs
Sits a little boy and girl
Their mom and dad are fighting
Their little eyes so scared

But their going to live, forever, somewhere
So help me God
I've got to show them
How much you care

On the third floor up in ICU
With a bandage on his head
He may not make it till tomorrow
Was the last thing the doctor said

But he's going to live, forever, somewhere
So help me God
I've Got to show him
How much you care

Every face that I pass by
I see you on the cross
Baring all my guilt and sin
Not one of us should be lost

I'm going to take this message
Of love that I've found
And somehow share it with this world
So help me God

I would love to take full credit for this poem but my contribution is small and I added only one of the 4 stanzas. Two great lifelong friends of mine named Bob Browning and Ed Dixon we're the main writers. Eddie passed of brain cancer four years ago and Bobby and I miss him very much. The reference to the ICU is a reference about Eddie. This poem is listed in his honor.

Edward M. Dixon
Robert G. Browning
Carl Joseph Roberts

Apr 2014 David Bojay

a God with Skin

Apr 2014 David Bojay

eunsung aka Silas

a God with Skin

Hey Yehoshua (Joshua),

How did a nice Jewish boy like you become the savior of the world?  They transliterated your name into Greek and called you Jesus, but to me you will remain a Jewish boy from a podunk little town.  You were probably lonely and out of place like me, a shy immigrant boy from Korea growing up in Western NC. You had giant expectations to fill.  Your dad was larger than life and sometimes a little demanding,  I relate.
  More than my savior, I want you as a friend and a fellow traveler.  Sometimes I focus on your divinity so much that I forget you are flesh and blood like me, a God with skin.  You've felt the long sleepless nights, the thirsting and hunger for a God sized whole to be filled.  You've experienced the pain of betrayal and most important you know how hard it is to love and be loved by imperfect people trying to love with all their brokenness.
  Josh, I'm not sure if this is a poem or letter, but I wanted to say hello.  Thanks for welcoming me into your life and calling me a friend and a brother.  I'll try to pass on the message by living it out, and share how my life changed when I encountered a God with Skin in the depths of my despair.  I keep walkin' the walk a day at a time.

Peace,

EunSung aka Silas

Apr 2014 David Bojay

a letter to my younger self

Apr 2014 David Bojay

eunsung aka Silas

a letter to my younger self

Hello me,

I'm you. I'm the older you after multiple suicide attempts, and lost in a haze of ***** and drugs. I am also you who sought and searched for some meaning and belonging, only to find hypocrisy and pain. But all that aside, I wanted to thank you for not giving up on life even though you wanted to. Finally asking for help when you did, even though a part of you didn't care anymore. Thank you for letting hope grow in you one day at a time. Thank you for letting me love you, so I can love me today. Life is pretty amazing today, and we would have missed out on this beautiful journey because we were so locked in our pain. Now, you and I can share our story of pain and suffering to help someone else. We don't have to stay in a hopeless state of mind and body. Thank you for having the courage to surrender and admit you couldn't do it alone anymore. I love you very much.

Love,

I'm You

This is a reminder to myself that I am not alone, and a love letter to myself , to my friends, and strangers yet to be friends who are struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts.

#love #suicide #hope #courage #search #surrender #thank