If i could say the most of my thoughts in ten words.....
The words would be a simple puzzled strike...
A lash out on the grins of content fools...
"Believe while you dream attrocities
              Not attainable to
               broken hearts"....

The drunken dance of our war torn hearts are just the echo of a better time in my shattered mind....
The laughter of the peak of hapiness is just a cruel mask to temporary solitude...
Bring me back to my home or at least the castle in memories and stay safe in my arrogant tower...
Let your pedastal stand in hoarded surroundings so my clutter looks up to something...
Ill pull myself together and break the spell of shattered dreams only to make the moment seem beautiful....
But dont look back or the five oclock shadow of a broken man will engulf the joy i see in your eyes....
I disappear into the nothingness created by my wisdom to let her be free....
And as i watch her leave she takes the last breath of pure air in my vaccuum of heartache...

I have to believe these useless words I write are a passage aimlessly pointed towards success....
That the repulsive looks are destined for the past only to replay the taste of bitter judgement....
Wilting sunlight dances across my desk as my words always head for darkness.....
Learned behaviors are just the starting point towards greatness.....
My lust for popularity is gonna be just a checkpoint on the way to my love of written word....
As I look back at the life i left to the fruits of my craft I realize....
Only I appreciate where I am and where Ive been...
And I neither care or hope to make you understand my poetry.....

All the pills you said made you my friend...
Are memories and scars in the parts noone sees...
You value yourself like a billionare values a dollar....
I see you like a homeless person sees a sandwich...
Worth more than anyone knows or can understand....
Its not the kind of love that makes any sense.....
We are not what each other plan or brag or wish...
But like air food and water the things deadman wish....

You always looked at me and said "Darling smile"....
I smiled out of politeness because i wasn't sure what made me sad.....
You use to hold me tight when during the night my dreams were more than i could take...
I drank like the answer to all my problems were in some sort of crisis at the bottles bottom....
Then like I had to celebrate I pushed thru the safety in your arms and said " *******"...
With tears in my eyes and fear in my mind it made you the enemy.....
But when i heard no mayday from 20 000 leagues under the liquor...
I was happier than i ever was rescuing the answer that never came...
No first aid trying to resuscitate the dead reason for my misery will ever be equal to you...
Like I get it now they weren't calling for my help they were calling me away from you....
I see you sometimes with that bottle like you hear that SOS too....
I sent out a message from my hell neatly wrote in a bottle....
It reads BABE IM ALL THE HELP THEY NEED... GO BACK ILL COME BACK AS SOON AS I CAN....
And then I go back to my rescue just looking for answers somewhere at the bottom......

Tell me what it is you see when i say the word beauty or love  ....
Most would say a flower a sunset or there god from above....
I see it as a toothless grin from the man who values more with alot less than others....
The scared adopted kid when he learns that he has brothers....
The family who lost everything to some unknown fate....
But knowing together they are stronger than any hate...
The smile of a child in a moment of fear...
That is the time that makes everything clear...
That beauty and love may not walk hand in hand...
That the definition of each is for us to understand....
Look at the world in a view through others peoples eyes...
And it will show itself in ways that always surprise....

Please be the best version of beauty...
Laugh louder than anyone else...
Be the life of the party....
Dance and hold him close....
Fall asleep in his arms...
Miss the embrace that you deserve...
Make love everynight...
Fall into his stare be safe in his strength...
You are the moment he knew love exists...
The angel he never thought he could kiss...
I see you together and i realize now what I miss.....