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417 · Apr 2018
Ambitions
It is from what birth
I saw my cause
As but a stone in the depths
Of Hellish fronts
To serve but a bridge
So those lost in darkness
May find their true place
In Light
But some time passed
As my stone started to burn
An angelic light
Found me and saw my worth

Since that fateful day
I feel freed from my bounds
Just hoping
And endless praying
To meet the divine beauty
That captivated my sight
Seemingly ages ago
Who continues to whisper in the night
As I cannot pull away
From the shimmer and wisdom
Of the starlight
Deep into her eyes
As each glimmer
Quickly proves to be
But mere fragments of
Her divine soul

It is but a source
So strange, yet so familiar
It is but a lesson in life
And a heart of warmth
Untapped and hidden
By the corrupt of souls
As it seeks to find a way out
The deepest pieces of my very being
Just wish to be there to help
In any form she may see fit
But it is with hope
That I pray the angel I seek
Knows that my intention
Is not to add toxicity to her life
But to join my own to hers
To lead us to serenity
To help as many as we can
And to flourish against the odds
399 · Aug 2018
Can you hear me
Can you hear me
Can you see me
Far from the daylight
Stuck in this fight
Can you hear me
Can you see me
I am lost here
Waiting for you my dear

The skies keep falling
Hell keeps rising
I can't keep going
This battle is too much

Heaven's armies scrambling
Father's wishes dying
Demons always trembling

The hordes of lost souls
Screaming in the night
For the lives they stole
From the light
Prayers are never answered
As God left this world
To let creation take its time
Free itself, from grasps of cancered
Loosened from the crime

Can you hear me
Can you see me
Far from the daylight
Stuck in this fight
Can you hear me
Can you see me
I am lost here
Waiting for you my dear
380 · Apr 2018
If I Am To Die Tonight
If I am to die tonight
Let all my secrets spill
About the lives I lost
And those I saved
As part of my fight
Surging thunders for its thrill
Forgetting the true cost
Of what my heart truly craved

If I am to die today
To the countless I saw
It is to which I thank yee
For memories I cherish
Beyond what words may say
Farther than the eye may see
And last long past my perish

If I am to die tomorrow
Let the sands of time
Slow to a wounded crawl
So I may find myself drunk
On the serenades of friendship
I have longed to enjoy
And resurrect my memory
From endless sorrow
As my mind so focused on crime
Tried to seal away everyone outside
Its wall
And keep inside worthless junk

If I died yesterday
I shall beg the angels
To let my soul wander
So I may visit all
Who I let reside in my heart
To simply remember
The beauty in them I loved
From bonding miles away
To moments alone upon a hill
And treks into the valleys
Leaving myself to ponder
The purpose of life I left behind
Forgetting the reason to brawl
So I may truly part
Into the warmth of heavenly embers

If I am to die
Let me take each moment
To make what wrongs I can
Right
Let me flourish
To give what life I have left
Its fullest fulfillment
Before it's fooled
By another conman

If I am to die
Let the one I love
Know my true embrace
Without a source of doubt
Far past all fear
To which I may cry
When the wedding with white doves
Brings deserve joy upon her face
As I repeat the words to assure
"I am forever yours,
My dear"
377 · Aug 2018
Loving Someone I Shouldn't
I hate that I have this feeling
A residency in my chest
Filled by an unexpected guest
That I cannot confess
Outside of subtle hints
Of what haunts nearly every thought
At least for a time
Until it is right

I keep that photo close
A rare moment
Probably so common
For people accepted
Maybe that's all it really is
What I actually feel
Just being a part of a family

Nevertheless
The truth is rather a mess
I know I shouldn't feel like this
But this is still the case
The place in my heart
Will always be there
In hopes that the soulful eyes
Will meet mine
To hold the heart
Like I owed when we part
I miss it greatly
To which I will keep to my vow
To do what I can
So it will always be there

The doors will always be open
The windows even cracked
If time allows it to happen
She will always have a way in

Perhaps
On the off chance the heart sees better
What my eyes cannot
And its childish wish
For this
Is granted by reality
I hope that they can see
What it is that nearly blinds me

A pure heavenly light in the darkness
The reason for the battle to greatness
To rest in the valleys
Seeding rose gardens with possibilities
Of the future past the expectations
Promised by the angels
Given that I followed the order
To push through and fight for the masses
That couldn't take the battles on their own
To bring about a world those people can feel safe in

That is what she brings out in me
A sense of purpose in this life
I had forgotten I had
In a time of hardship
Even if the wishes I cast never fulfill
The truth is I love her still
And see she was simply meant
To revive the part of me that died

I have to accept that may simply be the case
As anything more may simply be fantasy
As for now I cannot be anything more to her
Than a watchful overseer and friend
328 · Jan 2019
MoonLight Meaning
Thoughts of darkness I never leave
Chances to escape both frighten
Yet give me reason to believe
The ecstasy of serenity
Freeing me from its grasp
By walking the shadowy path
To leave many to give
Many the chance to enlighten
Their own abyss
As my only motivation
Is to somehow conceive
The hearts to which thieve
My own straight from my chest
Leading to forging an identity
Some question as a psychopath
Yet I know no other way to live
In hopes the vision with the child's kiss
Becomes my life's fruition
To constantly better my best

A question often whispered
Is if the child I foreseen
Had named her mother to be
Fortune strikes no
Yet the journey often wonders
Otherwise there would be no mean
As one continues to strike against my heart
Someone has my attention
Enough so that efforts to hide such affection
Are seen through with ease

But timing and public voice
Render a pursuit not as wise
But the distance offers such an advantage
To still be there in times of need
Without risk of crossing that line
Until it is time
Where she can be free to make that call
Without ties to strangle her mind
That often seems to find ways
To poison her in random times
But truthfully I cannot judge
As my own head likes to tease
Such dread

But if I may be honest
Just so I may get a chance to release
Each time I see her, every hint of her presence
I cannot help but see
Her face in the moonlight
A divine gift to help with sight
As I'm acquainted more with night
Than that of daylight

She started to catch the reasons why
Yet didn't want me to disappear
I have tried to distance myself with others
But even faces barely known to me
Saw through my masquerade
So it is hard to deny through truth
Leaving me to only the original choice
To simply wait and see
What is all this moonlight meaning
A mere fantasy from lonesome thoughts
Or a true destiny never thought possible

— The End —