i'm considering actually jumping in front of a car
just so i don't have to go home today
i don't want to go
i'm going to be in so much trouble
i could run away
i could jump in front of a car
i could just sit here and not leave
but if i do not continue to exist after today
just know i was in a lot of pain
and that i'm sorry
i wish i could have stayed

hi hello
what's your darkest truth

black holes
******* in all common sense
feeling a little like outer space
my blood filled with stardust

name me
like an unknown
alien

I'll show you the galaxy

I've got no home
everywhere I go

temporary
floors

hey
are you still hurting

I should've known
you would hurt me

why am I so naive

never thought you would make me feel so small
so gone

I'm not going back

don't talk
don't think
don't look at me


I'm rotting
inside my own heart

thank you

for killing me

sitting on a used bed
your presence disappeared into the pillow sheets

opened a journal
like a treasure map

running around
trying to get me back

hiding inside a box
without a lock

almost died
I cried
bled
felt the end of the world

everyone knows me
that's not the truth

pages
I spilled myself on

under a lake

asking myself
why does my heart
feel so heavy

can't hold a pen

I hear odd sounds
as if I lived underwater

presents
a book filled with empty pages
standing in front of me

I should know

I'm running away
from myself

I know myself
that's not the truth

////
don't come looking around for someone who doesn't exist
don't go loving someone who doesn't feel the same
\\

I haven't been able to write today
And I think it's because everything is okay
There is nothing to do and nothing to say
And it makes me miss being sad

There are flowers blooming inside of my mind
A rainbow just fell across the sky
Everything is warm and I don't know why
But it makes me miss being sad

The warmth of happiness inside of me
Is everything that I've wanted to be
But now that it's here it's unfamiliar to me
And it makes me miss being sad

The warmth in my mind is beautiful and bold
And I once hated the feeling of feeling so cold
But now that I'm somewhere else I miss home
I just think I was made to be sad