Unlearning something you have learnt or detaching yourself from something or some belief you have grown up with is one of the most challenging things in life. It takes both time and effort and a tremendous amount of willpower as well.

-


i have decided to
meditate on
nothing

by filling a moment
of voids with -

no parks
no dogs to walk
no children out playing
no cars cruising dead end streets
no boats in a river that flows nowhere
no fishermen having fish to fill their boats
no livelihood, no fish on a plate, no plate
to place back on the shelf, no shelf
to fix upon the wall, no wall
to hang photos, no photos
to look at, no faces
to recall,

nil,

just so maybe i can
feel the Universe
pour itself

back into me...


s jones
Dec 2020

.

I fear my brittle heart cannot
bear another harsh winter

On a quiet night
when my soul departs,
do not suffer

Though I will be asleep for
the many winters to come

Tenderly, I shall
embrace thee in a dream

i would draw you
                               with a chapped charcoal ;the cheapest kind
i would paint you
                                with purple hair
                                          violet eyes
                                          green lips
                                          lavender teeth
                                          burgundy skin
                  hands outstretched in a beguiling teal
                  brows lifted in an audacious amber
                  with so much indigo behind you
(and i would smudge it all
until i see an explosion
of shades and hues and tones and lullabies)

Can I give a girl anything  
Except what she wants

I've drank the finest of wine
Down to the bottom of the bottle
Only to witness an ocean alone
Barely surviving my own hands

A fire burned through my viens
That was blew out by the wind
Breezing through the leaves
A calmness that sits with me
Before calmness dismisses me

I walked across the tallest blue sky
Where wide winged birds soar high
Til promises of white clouds turn grey
And so there I fell with the rain
Dripping through the lowest gutter

Many times I was buried, lying in dirt
Like a grave, needing no help
Finding the dark inside of myself
But I always rise with the blades
Of the greenest fresh spring grass

No matter what feeling I catch
None of them seem to everlast