Independence - Hello Poetry

Nov 2014

Molly

ABC's

Adding apologies to artillery shells does not amend the action,

And

My brokenness betrays me when it bellows that I have beaten bruises black and blue into your back

But

Crying is a catharsis much too commonplace to convey these casualties.

My doubtful disposition has denied you deliverance from your daring endeavors

Because

Emptying myself to entertain someone else's enormous sense of entitlement

Is

A feeling that frightens my already fragile sense of forwardness.

Glory from a god who glances generously upon us growling ghosts

Is

A Heaven that hurts like hell because happiness is heresy

But

Isolation is an independence I never intended to introduce here.

Juggling jokes and jealousy between juggernauts is jeopardizing my judgement

Because

Kindness is to knowing the truth as kissing is to your knuckles,

It's

Like living life as a lamb but loving a lion.

Missiles gone missing are making me misunderstand my own memory

Yet

Needles have never seemed so necessary as when you're near,

And

Ownership is not an option so we have both become orphans.

Praying to people seems more plausible than pleasing a perfect being

So

I will quantify rather than qualify the quaintness of this quarantine

And

Respectfully reply that paying retribution to a ***** is ridiculous.

Soon something will surface that sends shivers down your spine

But

Today there is only turmoil taking its time to taper off

So

Understand when I utter the word "unify" that I mean us.

Vain and vindictive as you have very well verified being,

If

We worship with what we wish, not what we will,

Our

Exploitation will exemplify an axis on which oxymoron is expedient.

You and your yearning will not yield to yonder threats,

Because

The zeal of this zephyr will carry us to the zenith.

Trying out a different style, let me know what you think

#love #religion #relationships #alphabet

Sep 2014

Nicolette Avery Pizzigoni

You Are My First Poem After Writer's Block

Welcome to my Sunday Night.

12:50 AM
Wide awake from the adderall
I swallowed to chase my need
for achievement

1:03
After Achieving approximately
zero
of my work
I find myself fully indulging
In the little
teenaged
demon
on my shoulder.

As she encourages
The Rapid Fire
of
Clicks

That lead to your
Facebook Page

1:04
I'm paging through photos of your
lovers past

I
Stop
and
Stare

at Her

And So begins
The Laundry List
of comparisons

She has a better jawline than mine.
Her eyes are browner than mine?
Her gaze is Piercing
She's so edgy
She's so original

She's basically
Perfect

1:35
At this point
I've

Paced

Approximately 205 Circles
Around My Room

Listed

About 80 Reasons
Why she's Better than me

Crawled

Into a Fetal Position
Of Panic

Concluded

That I could
Never
Make You as Happy as She Did

Wondered

How I could have been so
Foolish

Concocted

37 Schemes for Finding
A Way Out

Imagined

You calling her
"Baby"

Over
and
Over
and
Over
and
Over

Cried

Searching for the emotions I'd gambled
Like Poker Chips

Throwing them all in,
as a Sentiment to my
Commitment

1:40
I'm Asking Myself
1:41
How would I ever give him what he needed?
1:42
How could I be the Girl he'd end up with?
1:43
Why would I believe that I was right for him?

Each minute delivering haymaker Questions,
Each more crushing than the last.

And as my mind prepared for its Nightly Death

I Pause.

1:45
Checking the date that these photos found Origin
1:46
Approximately
3 Years

Since it was all over.

3 Years since the last
I
Love
You

Post

More than 2 Years since
The last photo that his eyes
Sang
Genuine Love Songs.

3 Years that

Their hearts had not been
beating each others names.

1:47
My Brain drags back
The Questions of Before
Torturing Me.

1:48
But Suddenly
There's a **** inside me
My heart is playing
defense

1:49
How Could I give him what he wanted?

Because my heart beats for the seconds in which your smile resides.

Because I'll accept nothing less than what you deserve, sun and stars alike.

1:52
How could I be the girl he'd end up with?

Because 3 Years is enough time to refine your tastes.

Because I'm in love with you today, and today you kissed me
With your eyes closed.

Because that smile doesn't belong to her anymore.

1:55
Why would I believe that I was right for him?

Because you deserve someone to love you like only I can.

Because I am a fighter.
I fight for what's right.
And every part of me is fighting for us.

Because I will not be driven away by shadows that
leave
as Darkness Descends.

I am there in the nights when
goosebumps
chill.

I am there when
I can only be
felt.

I am there
to create a smile that
can only be
heard.

Who are you to believe so strongly in a pipe dream?

2:00
I am the hopeless romantic.
2:05
I am the one whose got nothing left to lose.
2:10
I am the one who wears that title as a Badge of Honor.
2:15
I am the one who will fight the world in protection of that tribute.
2:20
With every swipe of my pen in a
love letter
2:30
With every kiss
fueled like a
right hook
2:40
With every second
shoving toward making
You Happy
2:50
Who are you to claim him
"yours"?

I'm the one who refuses to get lazy with time.
I'm the one who will never say things out of spite.
I'm the one who has committed to their joy.

3:00
Who am I?

I'm the girl who will show him how to be loved.

That's ******* who.

I don't know how I feel about this.

#love #iloveyou #loved #inlove #fighter #insecurity #committed #whoareyou #imcaught #bewithme

Sep 2014

Molly

All This Is

This is a lonely phone call,
this is the hole in my chest,
this is my 7th shot.
This is spelling please wrong in texts,
this is crawling out the window barefoot,
this is driving without headlights.
This is him, being there.
This is his hand on my thigh,
this is whiskey flavored kisses,
this is turning the lights off.
This is not love making,
this is bone ache
heart break
bed shaking.
This is avoiding eye contact,
this is telling him I should leave,
this is getting dressed on opposite sides of the room.
This is a quiet drive home riding shotgun,
this is trying to act casual so he doesn't get the wrong idea,
this is secrets I keep from my best friend,
this is ***.
That's all this is.

#depression #alcohol #***

Aug 2014

Molly

I Want You

I want you to text me drunk
want you to admit you still love me
want you to say my name
to say please
to say I'm sorry
to be you again

I want you to tell me about those nights
the ones when I would've settled for anyone
when I grabbed your hand
I want you to tell me how you remember it
want to hear you say how safe you felt
how right everything was
want to look into your eyes
because I could never bring myself to then

I want you to need me
to love me
to hurt me
to tell me you hate me
want you to want me until it hurts
until your heart explodes
until you start kicking yourself ******
because you know I will try to fix you
want you to be empty
to be sad
to be angry
to be forgotten
I want to be there
to be thoughts
to be longing
to be lust
to be dark living room
to be eighth beer
to be cigarette break
to be last time
to be last time
to be last time
to be I swear to god this is the last time

I want to destroy you from the inside out
want to be worse for you than the ******* in your veins
want to fill your lungs like tar
to burn your throat when you cough up my name
want your eyes to sting
your head to pulse the next morning like my heartbeat
your tongue to taste like mine

I want to be unhealthy
want to be bad habit
to be addiction
to be two weeks sober
to be relapse
to be six months sober
to be relapse
want you to come back
to crawl back
to beg
to cry
want you to feel every place I've ever touched you

I want you to realize what love is
want you to stop using the word lightly
want to get my heart's worth
want you to know what you signed up for
want you to understand what loving me means

#love #addiction #depression #anger #pain #frustration #longing

Jun 2014

Forgotten Heart

I'm glad

I'm glad
finally
you
once thought
to think
about me
before
your ego....

Thousands of thanks to you

Jun 2014

Forgotten Heart

everything

i hope
one day
soon
you will know
how much
you mean
to me,
in my life....

Jun 2014

Forgotten Heart

my love & my life

you are
the love of
my life
and
you are
the life of
my love

you are my every thing every moment

Jun 2014

Forgotten Heart

my heart's rhythm

every moment
my heart
beats
with the
rhythm
of
"you
are
mine
forever"

missing you in many ways

Jun 2014

Forgotten Heart

ur shadow

i am your shadow
so just remember
you can't get rid of me
even if you wish
till you die.....

i am with you forever

Jun 2014

Forgotten Heart

again & again

i really
can't get over
your memories
after so many struggles
when i decide to
**** your memories
from my mind
you suddenly
make a
wonderful move
that once again
i'm falling
in love with you

nothing can be done with this