There's a place I can go, to escape all the fear,
Where I'm free to be me, and can cry floods of tears,
It's a place in my mind that's a beautiful room,
It defends me in times of the terrible gloom..

I just stumbled across it one terrible day,
When I needed to end it all,and drift away,
I was making a plan, which would end everything,
When this voice, out of nowhere, made my ears ring..

And a film roll of pictures and sounds it would give,
Some of young, some of old, they inspired me to live,
So i listened and cried a lot, feeling it so,
And decided to store it all, wanting to know..

So I nurtured and kept it all deep in my head,
And I labelled that room of glee "For times of Dread",
So of course when the gloom takes hold, I knock three times,
And I'm welcomed with love, so inside I climb..

And a shower of images, sounds and such love,
Keeps me safe and alive, and it fits like a glove,
Scenes of happiness, wonder and sweet sanctuary,
Are all tucked up inside, for when I lose......the real me.....

It should have been easy
I shouldnt have had that unsettled feeling in my stomach when kissing you
And honestly I really don't
But the thought of anything else makes me uneasy
I'm attracted to you
I'm comfortable with you
So why can't I make myself go further?
I thought it was just that I hadnt found the right person
Or maybe we just hadn't been together long enough
Or that my religious upbringing caused me to have an avoidance to ***
Some psychological training in the back of my mind telling me I would be shunned from God
I never understood cheaters
How *** could be so tempting
How anyone could get addicted to it
How random hook-ups and one night stands were the norm in our world
I am out of place here
It's not like I dont want to have that connection
I just don't feel the drive
Then I thought it was my medication
But I realized long before the chemistry in my brain was artificial that I wasn't intrested in the ****** acts most people were
And to be honest even when I am in the act, I dont really have a drive
Never felt the need to ******
Always focused on satisfying the other partner
Because this was a relationship and it's what I'm supposed to give and I dont want to keep that from them
It causes strain in them
Causes a distance that I dont feel is there
For a long time I thought I was broken
Now I know for sure that I am
But I want you to feel secure,
So I'll fake it again and again
Let you do to me what I have no interest in
Maybe this time will be different.

You are the tailor
The maker
The storm and the desire

The sea appears before our eyes,
with tides that wash and sanctify;
And lifts our spirits toward the sun,
where golden rays connect as one.

They sanctify our souls within,
with crystal waters erasing sin;
And cleanse the ache of angry ire,
extinguishing all the raging fires.

While resting on the burning sands,
we contemplate our lives' demands;
With hearts aspiring to simplicity,
and Wills designed to set us free.

As we watch the rolling of the sea,
the tides tumbling fast and furiously;
We sense that angels rise above,
to demonstrate God's eternal love.