The cluster of ice in my glass
  looks like a milky fist.
I shake my cup and ask
  about the weather.
He says, 'Hasn't rained in
  one thousand or so years.'
I say how that's unfortunate;
  he says how **** happens.

This party transitions into
  something out of an art-house film;
the Cali-tens are dancing to some
  80's song you would vaguely recognize.
They bump into one another
  like bees in an electric hive.
A Russian drinking a Russian
  asks about drugs.
I say into my drink that I
  don't have that many friends.

Looking for a bathroom,
  I am bumped by hips and lips
into the former eggshell/cigarette stain wall,
where I find my partial reflection
  looking back at me in that familiar
transparent parent way.

I find myself apologizing.

You lose nothing in
the Loving Hands of Jesus
You gain everything

Some days ripen
heavy with fruit

you can reach the lower branches
and fill your basket

you can eat the flesh
juice down your chin

and laughter can follow you
deep into the summer nights.

put chocolate on my tongue
and I will be a willing slave.

Running through the dark
   our backs against walls
we were frightened heroes.

Sometimes the mind is lost in the labyrinth
far from love and loves consolation
but the land is still and silent and the sky sits watching
and welcomes the traveller from their toil
-the forever wandering in search of a home
the silence and the silent fused in perpetual embrace
a belonging, a homecoming, a way of being
discovered and rediscovered, the heart of the Universe.

a quiet determination
to not sell out
is all I ever had.

car ride,*
to,
your house,
to,
your yard,
up,
the stairs,
to
your front door,
to,
enter,
to,
step inside,
to,
look around,
to,
be leaded,
up,
stairs,
to,
stop,
to,
open the door,
to,
enter,
to,
wait for you,
to,
sit with my friend,
in,
your room.
to,
watch you enter,
to,
ask you about your day,
to,
be your friend.
but,
you, lay, down,
to,
pull, me close,
to,
not, let go,
to,
get, on, top,
to,
go, down, my pants,
to,
take, off, my top,
to,
not, hear me, when I screamed,
**STOP.