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I'm the dark expanse of midnight
I'm the cold unyielding stone
I'm the harshness of the sunlight
And the brittle of the bone
I'm the maker of the music
I'm the bringer of the fight
I'm the storm in midsummer
I am the cold, I am its bite
I'm the stars falling from heaven
I'm the prayers left unheard
I'm the devil, slinking snake
And the shrieking of the bird
I'm the black that eats all things
I am the shortness of a breath
And the weeping of the broken
I am hollow, I am Death


the sun rests
on my hair on a
winter afternoon

hours fleeting
rushing into the
calm evening

not daring to
go inside subtracting
myself from grace

I keep my head down
bowed as I write between
letters my emotions
www.annamosca.com

This poem is part of the bilingual collection California Notebooks 01
I have dreams of him
His eyes are missing
All flesh, pristine
He's not looking but still seeing
He cannot show but he guides me
To the meadows I roam free
Clear skies torn apart by sun rays
Like it was always that way
Our bodies glisten as they sway.

He calls me in, a messenger
I breathe him and he is medicine
From the ghosts in my bedsheets
From mosaics of grief I've seen
And the shadows appear on the hilltops
Trickling towards me like rain.

Then stormy skies run like watercolour
He is gone and darkness creeps in
Bad dreams line the clouds of sleep
From summer in the meadows to rough seas
I see his face in my morning coffee
And I pour him down the sink
For I cannot swallow this feeling
Knowing the visions belong to me.

You haunt my dreams of places I will never visit
People I will never meet
In the background of each painting
You're the stains on every seat
You're the barbed wire round my heart
You're the rotting in the woods
You're the dark circles under my eyes
I can't sleep because of you.
The knife is calling my name, the razor in the bathroom is screaming at me.
I look down at my arm and see the scars, I pull down my sleeves to cover all the memories the scars leave.
I try to get up and live, I remember the first time I cut I was 13.
I don’t want to live anymore, Goodbye.
"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)"
I get the chills as your hand touches my waist,
Looking at your lips, I just want a taste
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