I was on my way to the town over.
Warm sunshine flooded in through every window,
palm trees were lined up in their correct order,
and the bluest California sky imaginable was right above me.
At every stop,
I heard the cars pass by me.
They remind me of you leaving.

I can still recall each individual crack my heart had that day.
How much it broke,
and at exactly what times.
I can still recall the song playing on the radio,
I listen to it all the time.
It brings me back to our last day.
When I still had you,
even though I lost you.

I hope my heart can forgive me for the cruel despair I've caused.
No other feeling can compare to how it felt when you left.
Nothing has been right ever since.

it's a long, strange road
that links present me and past me together.
if i had to describe autumn in one word,
it would be painful.
lovely, yet painful memories that i miss the most are the same ones i push farthest away from me.
so i always tell myself i wont get thrown off by autumn this year,
but i always end up basking in all
its nostalgic glory.

it was the last moments in time before you ignored me for a week straight.
the last moments in time before anxious hours arose of me waiting for your call to light up my phone,
just so i could ignore it.
the last moments in time before i finally decided to give up trying to fix something that was completely and unapologetically broken.
and the very last moments in time
we were ever truly happy.
i will remember these moments forever.

i need to sleep this sadness away
like a bad drug that i can't escape when i'm awake
hoping that the effects will wear off and i can forget
but i can never forget