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Someday
I hope to not be trapped in a hell that I call my own
Maybe I will be happy and not feel so lonely
But happiness is what I pursue
If I finally obtain it
What is there to chase after?
What is there to spur me on?
Someday
I hope to be somewhere good
With nothing but the things I need
And everything is just perfect
In my own little world
But what if that version of Someday
Doesn't exist
And I am only left with a bad taste on my lips
Wishing that I had never thought of Someday
Of a world that is better than ours
With no pain
No suffering
And no wishing that you could die
Sadly I think Someday
Will only ever exist in my mind
A place of war
And heartache
People and their wavering lies
I'm sorry that I told you of Someday
A place so perfect
That it will never exist
I'm sorry that if for a moment
I gave you the smallest glimmer of hope
That one day
You could find this Someday
And everything would be fine
That all is good in the this small world
That I'll just call Someday
Maybe if you love me I'll love you

Maybe if I disappear I will be forgotten

Maybe if I'm clingy you will leave

Maybe if it's dark you won't have to see me cry

Maybe if I break your heart you'll shatter mine

Maybe if it's loud I can finally scream

Maybe if you hold me I'll hold you

Maybe when I smile you'll think it's real

Maybe when I laugh it won't sound fake

Maybe when I cry my face will feel dry

Maybe in the morning my wrist'll be stained red

Maybe one day I'll actually stay in bed

Maybe one day I'll find a way

Maybe one day there will no longer be a tomorrow

Maybe one day won't end in sorrow

Maybe one day I won't miss you at night

Maybe one day I won't wake up in tears

Maybe one day I'll sleep my life away

Maybe one day I'll die in a peaceful way

Maybe one day I'll only be a memory

Maybe one day I'll be able to say I'm okay

Maybe one day I'll marry my past

Maybe one day I'll accept my reality

Maybe one day I'll wear colour again

Maybe one day I won't feel so numb

Maybe one day when I cut I'll feel the pain

Maybe one day I'll stop pushing people away

Maybe one day I'll let someone stay

Maybe one day I won't have to lie

Maybe one day I'll write one last poem

Maybe one day I'll face my fears

Maybe one day your smile will no longer dry my tears

Maybe one day you'll leave me behind

Maybe one day I'll be left to cry

Maybe one day I'll have heard a thousand goodbyes

Maybe one day I'll be able to look into your eyes

Maybe one day you'll stop feeding them lies

Maybe one day I'll hear your bark again

Maybe one day I'll stop missing you

Maybe one day I'll stop crying over you

Maybe one day you'll stop loving me

Maybe one day I won't miss you so much

Maybe one day I'll stop collecting

Maybe one day I'll only wear one

Maybe one day you'll leave me alone

Maybe one day I'll stop trying

Maybe one day I won't be able to cry

Maybe one day I'll burn them away

Maybe one day nothing will be the same

Maybe one day I'll be more careful

Maybe one day my memories of you will go away

Maybe one day there will no longer be a today

Maybe one day I'll officially declare you my forever and always

Maybe one day music won't be my only escape

Maybe one day I'll no longer want to die

Maybe one day you'll hold my tears at bay

Maybe one day I'll be led astray
January/ 29/ 2018/ 11:41PM/ 14 yrs old
Masked by silence
Making you think
That he wasn't the person he was
All of the ****** thoughts
That were constantly swirling in his head
Protected by a look
That could put fear
Into a bear's eyes

Masked by a personality that isn't her own
Making you think
She is something that she never was
Something that she'll never be
Fear holds her in its hands
Telling her to wear the mask
To not let anyone close enough
To see what she really is on the inside

These people met one day
They fell in love with the mask
That covered their lover
And told them that everything was fine
Over time the masks slipped
And they were found to be
Incompatible
While their hearts started to ache
To just let go
And let the person behind the mask
Follow you to places unknown
Shrouded by darkness
Where no one can see
The mask and the person wearing it
For they don't want to break another heart
By letting them see what's inside
For they were both masked
Fearing everything but the night
The way their lips curl back
To reveal sharply angled teeth
Looks less like a smile
And more like a warning
Their words cut worse than anything else
Leaving wounds that could never be filled with tears
Even the smaller wounds sting
When they are remembered later in life
And all of the old thoughts come rushing back
All of your wounds reopened
Just from all of their glass smiles
And sharp teeth
Nothing could be justified
By their improvised lies
Falling perfectly into place
Marking their victims with an unexpected daze

The tears that fall from our eyes
Are starting to turn red
As all of our blood rushes to our head
Burning rage chokes us to death
Until that time when we finally snap
And bring out our own glass smile
Preparing to leave wounds
Just as deep as the ones they left on you
Stab marks left behind on their waxy skin
They were just pretending to have emotions
You know that they were all fake
Their glass smiles making them real
More life like then their marring wounds
A fire lights inside me
At the sight of all these strangers
Who are the people that I know best
Though a time ago
This would have been fun
The fire burns inside of me
Like something I have never felt before
The embers char my skin
Leaving behind
The remnants of my mind
But there is no injury
Worse than the burning
Of my emotions
Leaving the strangers'
Amber glow
In the shadows
Of my own burning emotions
I suppose the meaning of life
Is something beyond
What any of us can understand
That we get lost amidst
The shooting stars
The bright lights
Then the shadows of life
Start to pull us into the night
But the meaning of life
Must be for people like me
And you
When we write poems
That help them to feel

I suppose the meaning of life
Is nothing more
Than get what you give
And love who you love
Live the life that you will always want

The meaning of life
Must be to learn
From mistakes past made
And fix the future
With our heart
The meaning of life
Must be to live it
Just as we are
Maybe if everyone knew just how much some people loved them for who they are, they want to live another day.
If I couldn't feel
Would you call me strong?
If my eyes never started to well,
Would I be good enough?
If I was dependent
If I was putting out
Would I ever be liked
By someone that I loved?
Or would there still be no one

If I was less of myself
More of everyone else
Would you think that I was nice?
If I blended into the crowd,
Would that surprise you?
Would it make me
Just another victim
To your sightless eyes?
Or would I just be no one?

If I was a girl that could be loved
Just as easily as it spilled from my blood
Would you love me then?
Maybe if I was pretty enough,
Perhaps I had a smile,
If my defense wasn't to be rough
And live in constant denial,
Would you see me then?
Or would I still be no one

I am tired of living under a guise
Of words that cut like a knife
And being unseen
To the nakedest of eyes
They wonder why I am so tough,
Why I have never shed a single tear
They must think that my life is fine,
That it's better to hurt than be hurt
But they don't no how much hurt
Goes into being no one
I am unseen to everyone I have ever loved
I am gone
To all of those that I will ever want
But maybe I can just continue
To be no one
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