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Even after you ruined me for any other,
I cannot regret you. Even as I cleave
the flesh of wanting from the bone,
I hope the night sky is pretty
wherever you are.
poem from:
http://sincerelyjoanna.tumblr.com/
I would die
For him
But he would rather
Die for her
the images of us being together flash through my mind.
My soul yearns to be closer to yours.
You will never know me as anything more than me,
but I will always know you as my world.
Hi
I can't stop thinking about you
Your eyes are so blue..
I remember when I first met you
Something sparked in me
I wanted to know everything about you
And then you smiled...
God that smile
I can still feel my heart melting when I think about you
I knew from the beginning
But I didn't
I knew there was something different about you
Something special
I wonder if you feel the same way?
I didn't think so
I remember the first time someone explained to me what the word gay meant.
We were in middle school
Playing on the swing set behind Stoy Elementary
"He’s so gay," she said
Bitter disgust poured out of her mouth with every syllable
I could not think as to why being happy could be such a horrible thing
And so I asked
My exact words being
“Whats so wrong with being happy?”
Now both my friends looked at me weird
“Don’t you know what gay means?”
“Doesn’t it mean to be happy?”
“You’re such a little kid, gay does not mean happy. Gay is a boy who likes another boy”
I stood there wondering why it mattered so much that a boy liked another boy;
why it was such a distasteful thing.
And why it meant gay couldn’t still mean happy.
last night, i realized
that i had become emotionally unavailable
and also that
my fingernails had gotten too long.

i clipped my nails and went back to bed.
i thought your name would be seared into my heart
like a brand
or written across my chest forever
like a tattoo

turns out, it was just scribbled on my forehead in sharpie
like a ****
boy
your mouth in my nightmares is sticky and warm,
but in the morning all i can taste
is stale cigarettes and the bars dissolving under your tongue
Want to pass notes on my phone
Like we're in grade school?
Might be more fun
Than reading the safety guide
For this airplane
Plus, if the plane goes down
We're ****** anyway
**
Forgive me for I have loved so many
I forgot the most important
Which was myself.
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