She wears her in many different styles and likes short dresses. She wears bright colors in clothing and makeup. She is full of sass and laughter. She likes to make a splash with her wit and her smile. She gets attention where ever she goes, but is never dull or boring. She offers a warm hand and support to any friend in need. She personifies the confidences that her parents taught her, all the while exuding *** appeal. She loves to wear heels as often as she can, she loves to know she was watched as she walks by. She will wink an blow you a kiss if you are luck. She will leave you speechless if you catch her eye.

I wake up at the beginning of every day.
Thinking about the time I'm wasting away.
I hope that one day I find an open door.
I know that I was meant for so much more.

With all of life's expense I have to keep pace.
It leaves me stuck between a rock and hard place.
I'm not looking for the way things were before.
That's what I'm trying to get away from for so much more.

When I say "So Much More" I don't mean material things.
I'm talking about the purpose for me that God brings.
And I pray in His will he takes me to a different shore.
Because I know that I was meant for so much more.

The endless monotony makes me wanna cry my eyes out.
But if not that it makes me wanna pry my eyes out.
But there is only one light that knows what's in store.
And I will dig deeper to know there is so much more.

Everything the past ten years have seemed meaningless.
But if it has a purpose then it has to be gleaminess.
The soul-crushing pain is for the renewing of my core.
So I can be filled with joy to know there is so much more.

My eyes hung heavy
Thoughts density,  
fill my mind

Shaking my head rapidly
Repeatedly,
Like a rabid infestation of mites had migrated to my mind.

I drink heavily to drown the *******!
**** the ******* thoughts
Of killing myself.

These placid thoughts,
From a outside world.
A outside world of farces.
Plastic people with their plastic minds
The heartless and soulless  carbon copied pigs of society.

Pretend your pretty life
Is pretty.
Pretend your petrified smile
Is real.
Infect me with your lies
Through the poisonous food
You graciously say is safe to eat.

Pretend I'm okay
As you strip my life away
Pretend to help
As you infect my veins.

**** all your followers
With ******* and lies
Tell all your children
How ******* hard you tried.

If a picture paints a 1,000 words.
Why am I speechless while staring at your beautiful face?

Quiet your chest
You hear that beat?
Risen higher not for myself
Me, I'm still tapping
A sound of voices to be heard--
Not silenced
Deafened ears to deliver a proposal

Success should stand alone, suggests
Men like me were given the world

Dreams are grown to fill empty spaces
Not koffers stuffed with expectations
Swapping lanes with no pedigree
Standing face to face
Both sets of shoes strapped to the streets

I plead only to be named
Before I drown in false decree
For what society sells
That I should stomach, or
Gain a swollen head and
Shrinking stomach

Shaking hands force I'll upon me
The world held steadfast with labels
They cry out for fixing
Core still, nor crust budging
I fix my mouth
With furled brow

Or I shall suffer for sins
Of fathers before me, no.
Shame success and dash
Madly for a swifter ending
To set finale, a silent resolution

Will it my memory stain;
Have my words mean something, then
I must stifle sounds and symptoms
Suggestions of suffering
Lest they betray, and

Allow the pages to burn
Away at this facade
Toe to toe my lines
To their words will claim me

Accosted by the inflicted
Afforded no frustration
Check the box, X
A default male Caucasian
Filling the need for false standard
--Lost still among a victim generation.

Oh, they changed over time.
Not really.
So don't be surprised.

Dating, just schemes built up to fool the eyes.

Where you put your best foot forward?
To appear something you're not.
You're trying to impress like an employer.

Trying to sell yourself to your selected lover.

So be not surprised, when truth appears before your eyes.

Cause you will show only the true you.

Through night tired eyes

I have watched as stars died

and

seen the sun rise over

me




but nothing prepared me for the

things prepared for me




a destiny written before

I was born.




set fire to and learn it

if it's written

I can burn it




***** made of steel

feel cold

( a random entry by me, yours truly)




Sunday has done for me

Monday will do for me

until Friday come through

for me

and then I can sleep.

My artistic tendencies have been asleep
Wake me up
Confetti coming when the cake is cut
Make sure to rake it up
Taking puffs to feel the same only made my visions change
Still mixing liquor, rain and other liquids To **** the pain
Plain paper bag with the key to life inside it
Problem being I only conceptualize it when Im high
Trip and fall and lose altitude
The earth is coming fast
I'm bout to hit rock bottom still praying my high will last