I was the anchor to your voyage
—and you were the poison for my heart

I sit and wail
As memories of you swell
Threating to bring down the wall
As I remember your final fall

You fell right through my out stretched arms
I could not save you from your demons harm
I could not bring you back to me
Now your memories is all I have to see

I was so angry you left me here all alone
This cut is deep, right to the bone
A wound that will never heal, never become just a scar
As you now dwell amongst the stars

Now I find, I turn my eyes to the midnight sky
The tears rolling quickly and quietly as I cry
I'm searching for something left by you
A shooting star, a comet, a clue
Just to let me know your okay, that you made it through

That would make it worth our final good bye
Maybe then my tears would subside
Maybe then they would turn to silent sighs
But the pain will always be with me that is true
For my dearest friend, I will forever miss you

Till we meet again on the other side
There's one thing that will never die
It is constant, it will always be the same
My love for you will always remain

Images extracted from
the tapestry of my dreams.
Sewn intricate...
Into a patchwork.

A quilt,
embroidered with lavish sequins and ornate beads.
Bringing forth fantastical motifs...
A dazzling display
upon the backdrop of my dreamscape.

Yet...
This mosaic of dreams
does not warm me so.
It never lasts.

They fall away like autumn leaves
come the dawning sun.
They get washed out and pulled into the tide,
as the waves beat upon the shore of wakefulness.
They fade into fragmented memories
that make no sense...
Incoherent and disjointed.

Eventually, they disappear...
For they do not belong
in a world of worldly things
and ticking clocks.
Their intangible and mismatched nature
render them inconsequential...
Naturally...
They get misplaced.

But I am stubborn.

I will fashion such a blanket.
One that skirts the boundary
of this realm and the other.

I will tailor it so...

So that...
I will sleep tonight,
swaddled tight and cocooned within its
glorious seams.
Tucked within the safety and warmth of
this blanket...
Woven immaculate...
Out of
worldly things and breathtaking dreams.

Love is like the rose
Beautiful, lush, fragrant
Yet forestalls it
Of being plucked
From the thorns
Of our own creation

you can promise me forever.
you can promise me every past star in the night sky,
every flower that the earth grows unapologetically,
every hour of sleep i always let slip away from me,
and i would still never believe you.

for some reason,
every word has lost its original meaning.
you tell me you love me,
but i can't even begin to grasp what you mean
when you say a four letter word that is the simpliest word to read.

i wish i could feel loved.
whatever that means.
and i wish i knew the original meaning.
whatever that means.

and then
one day
my sky
really did fall
and life carried on
without
me
but eventually
i was helped up
slowly
dusted myself off
and i even learned
to smile
again