am i ee

Jan 2016

Dead lover

Humanity, fears calamity,
Stop killing people of nature,
Don't act so witty!

Humans feared animals once,
People fear people today,
I'll continue, only if your allowance...

Nobody is above nature,
You are nothing more than,
Just another creature..

You **** people who refuse to accept,
You abducted some girls for your team's lust,
And the rich fled, while their homes you theft..

It is justice, from where, this idea crept?

#justice #injustice #terroism

am i ee Jan 2016

lost & wandering

sorrow nibbles at the edges of my heart
deep love transformed again
sharp shards of unbearable pain
pop up here and there
all goes on as always
death changes one
each and every loss
polishing edges...

who will i be when this
grieving wanes?

Dec 2015

Rivers Kay

Seperation of the skin

They, where just two kids. She was so new to the world he lived in and she waltzed in like she was looking to win a prize. MAYBE just maybe, she did.

No one knew nothing of her. Naomi, Naomi Quinn was her name. She was by far the most beautiful disaster he had ever laid eyes on. Naomi didn’t ever have it all but she made the most what little she did have. At least she tried and sometimes she broke and when she broke her skin would separate with a close of the eyes and just one swipe. As simple as she seemed her story was not.
Mommy and daddy where known as just some people she used to know. Not around much to stop the tears and certainly not to see her pain. She relied on her best friend. Winnie was sweet and Winnie would never back down from stopping the hurt that Naomi had to deal with every day. The names, the hits, the pushes, the shoves. No one asked Naomi how her days where or how she felt. No one but Winnie. Winnie was cautious of every step anyone took towards Naomi simply because she knows how delicate she is.
A normal day was just Winnie and Naomi each school day and weekend until the kid with the big brown eyes showed up. He walked with a mind of certainty and he talked with a purpose. Brown hair and a great smile. Tall and handsome with a name that seems to make her want to melt. Spencer Ray was not the kind to fall for a girl like Naomi. Spencer was confident and loved by anyone and everyone.
On a normal day the girl went to school and the girls they went home, but this day was different. The skies where bright the air felt fresh and the day was good. Naomi freezes mid- sentence next to Winnie rendered speechless. He stands there speaking as she blinds but does not awaken. A dream, she must be dreaming but she’s not. Spencer speaks to her. Why her? “Dinner at 8?” spencer questions the look he receives from Naomi and with just a blink of an eye he—wait nope he’s still there. Spencer asks a new question “how does a walk on the beach sound?” With just a nod of her head it’s a date.
“What do I say? What do I wear? Why me? Is this a joke?” Naomi panics completely forgetting Winnie is still there she sits down and just sits and sits and sits. Naomi sits until she figures out an outfit and she figures out what to say and she walks only after Seeing Winnie leaving in a car of a friend.
Racing home with a pounding heart she arrives only shortly before Spencer does too. In Jean shorts and a purple tank-top she hears the door and takes a breath. With a ragged old blue t-shirt and cargo shorts he hands her a flower and escorts her to the car.
The ocean breeze and the smell of his cologne with her hair down and hand in a pocket while the other dangles freely, he grabs it. Like the waves creeped up with not a noise made, her breathe is shortened. They stop and watch as the waved crash and the sun set as the sky turns darker for the night to sneak quickly. Not a word said all night then he speaks “Such a beautiful sight.” Naomi turns to see where he is looking as he is already staring into her eyes. “I have always loved the ocean its…” Naomi begins to say as spencer grabs her quickly and kisses her. On the third set past the white steps Spencer speaks the words “I wasn’t talking about the ocean” and he kisses her once more.
Weeks they pass and they begin to be in Love. Something Naomi would have never thought to know. Then something happens. The sweet loving kisses turn to loud hateful screams and the warming hugs turn to forceful shoves. Through this all Naomi stays not matter the many protests of Winnie. As this goes on Naomi becomes less strong and one day Naomi broke. Feeling like a failure she looks to spencer for comfort and all she seems to receive is question after question. “Why did you do it? How could you do that? Why are you like this?” With a response of a quiet sobbing “sorry” Naomi breaks once more.
Doing the one thing he swore not to do Spencer leaves for weeks. Naomi breaks and breaks and breaks. Weeks go bye and he calls. “I’m leaving you here with no return you are not my love I hope this won’t hurt.”
She thought she would make it. She was so strong but what’s there to do how should she move on? Bewildered destroyed once again by the one who held her together for so long. A best friend the one she loved and now what does this mean? Worthless? Replaced? Was she always JUST a friend?
The night it was cold and the skies had no stars the rain it poured down and she stood there looking at the ground. One two three four Just a couple more. Put them in swallow them all and right before the fall……..one last breathe…she jumps …
They never knew of her she was the background they all say but never questioned. Mommy and daddy where just some people she used to know. Her best friend she was the best that there was. The boy she once loved gets looked down on from above now with wondrous-hatred and tears in the eyes that loved like a fool.
Not until she was gone did they question her long sleeves and why she wore pants in the summer. They began to see all of her pain and all her troubles. They learned what they lost and it won’t be back tomorrow.
Falling, loving, sorrow and pain. Close of the eyes, pinch on the skin, just one swipe and that was the end.
“Separation of the skin”

Love you, Never Forget

Dec 2015

Flo

Cloud 7?

Your presence, your love
Lifts me upon cloud seven
Though I'd rather spend my time
With someone else
Perhaps on cloud two
For I am to afraid
Of falling deep
All the way
Again

Sometimes you are just too afraid of being happy because there is always that possibility that you could lose it all.

#love #broken #happiness #falling #cloud

Nov 2015

Dead lover

Dedicated to girls

Being a girl,
Doesn't mean a three way hole,
Being a girl,
Means to be admired and respected as a whole..

Being a girl,
Doesn't mean that getting married is your goal,
Being a girl,
Means to be whatever your heart says to your soul..

Being a girl
Doesn't mean that (just) as a mother, wife or girlfriend is your role..
Being a girl,
Means that you need to prove yourself as a diamond in the mine of coal..

Being a girl,
Doesn't mean that entire your life you need to stay a tadpole..
Being a girl,
Means that you need to develop into a frog before getting ole..

Being a girl,
Doesn't mean that you are the negative of the dipole,
Being a girl,
Means that - you need to take your life's control..

Being a girl,
Doesn't mean to accept your worth to be ***** and *****,
Being a girl,
Means to accept your beauty, not just the duty,

Being a girl,
Doesn't mean that you can be a heroine just in the movie..
Being a girl,
Means that you can be a superhero in real life - you can be a ruby!

Learn to accept your beauty girls..

Being a girl Doesn't mean to be oppressed by the so called " society's rulers "

Nov 2015

Adam Childs

COMPLEX

There was a little
sixteen year old boy
who had a little insecurity
So decided it best
to just go and run away

So he went on to make
and lose a fortune
travelled the world
went to thailand
pulled a violist in Chicago
Got some jobs and
a carrier too
And got drunk again
and again
And again
Learnt to meditate
found a Indian Guru
Worshipped Jesus
even slipped in a drug or two
before he bought a house
And got a degree

  Then one day it took just
   a teenage girl or two
In a field in Hampshire
To show him
That he in twenty years
he had gone no where
Was right where he first started

That he was
still that little sixteen
year old boy
who could not look
naked in the mirror
without
crying...

because he could not like
what he was seeing...

Now that boy inside of me
realizes there is no magic wand
no one to save him
and a thousand shields
won't protect him from
who he really is.

But i do someday hope
that i can raise my chin
to look in the mirror
without my stomach turning,
curdling and my mind holding
back my crying...

Nov 2015

John Patrick Robbins Aka Gonzo

Ask Dr Gonz / Im Still Alive

The hamster walked alone broken hurt and on the verge of ending it all.
The streets of Hello were empty as the head of the *******  who created it .

He just couldn't take it anymore school was driving him nuts  his family were insane and there had to be more to life than sitting in his room on weekends listening to ****** music writing angst driven poetry and ******* to internet ****.
Anymore viruses and his computer was going to be more infected than Katy Perry's rancid crouch .

All hope was lost when he saw it in the parking lot a van  with the words M.R  Gonzo's  advice and free clinic walk-ins and homeless nymphos welcome  .

It sort of looked like a old bookmobile and smelled like a ******* or something that had died in a ******* .

The young misguided hamster figured what the **** did he have to lose so he knocked on the door .
It swung open as a cloud of smoke poured out the door it looked like a scene from towering inferno or Willie Nelsons tour bus  .

After hacking up half a lung and getting a contact high a face of true poetic brilliance emerged from haze of smoke .
And the young hamster was looking straight at the  one the only the often perverted cult leader of Hello Gonzo.

Hey there amigo **** bud you don't know how glad I am to see you come the **** in .
Saying the that the living legend Of Hello grabbed his school book and vanished into smoky hollow .

The kid sat there awhile not knowing if he should run or follow this nut job .
Well that is until a hand reached through the fog and pulled him in.

What the **** kid your wasting a great buzz you know how long it took me to get this bake going in here have a ******* seat.
The inside of the place looked like some cross between a Pub and a bad seventies ****  minus the  ugly chicks with cracked out faces and Chewbacca between there legs .

Ummm maybe I should leave .
The kid said scared of this scene and the mad hatter of a person sitting with a stiff drink in hand a umm well lets just say a herbal cigar in the other .

Bud you need to relax I tell ya  I got the munchies from hell .
With that said he took a bite out of the text book.
Jesus Christ this **** tastes more and more like cardboard dude I aint paying for this ****** .

Umm I'm not a pizza delivery guy and that's my math book ******* .
Yeah of course I knew that im just ******* with you sparky .
Okay man fifty bucks .

What?
The young hamster was convinced this guy was totally insane .
Fifty buck's for what ?

Duh Fifty for the **** ******* what you really think anyone would come here for ******* life advice from me?
I mean sure I'm ******* awesome as **** I do great drugs I drink more  than a fish and chicks dig me I mean sure you don't see any around that's just cause there on a break man I'm kind of finding myself .
You know just me my drugs and the wilderness .

Okay that explains why this place looks like you live in it there's a stack of **** movies that looks like you raided a wharehouse and your parked in a vacant lot in the city.

Yeah well least Im not some kid selling terrible pizza's that taste like paper oh yeah your late bud so this ones on the house .

I'm not a pizza boy you crazy old ******* !

Taking a long pause the artist formerly known as Gonzo was dead silent .

You have a point pizza boy who am I kidding I live in a kickass converted bookmobile  where I basically sell dope  to little ***** looking to get high and hopefully get to see some ******* in between
and you my wise public servant of terrible tasting pizza are yet living a existence of misery selling **** for us stoners to stuff are wasted faces with.

Dude are you ******* nuts I'm not a pizza delivery boy I'm just a young writer looking for advice .
The  young hamster went into his whole tale woe how nobody liked him and he was being picked on by ******* jocks who seven years from now would working the same dead end job as himself jerking off to old game video's well the ones that didn't make it to the NFL and had super model ****** blowing them while they watched old game videos that is .

He rambled on as the wise slightly ****** and definitely drunk wizard of Gonz pretending to care and listen  much like he did to chicks he was trying to get lucky with.

You know Gonzo your really ******* weird but man I feel better .
I bet you were once just like me a outcast loser wimp who was deeply sensitive  and yearned for the love of another.

He just stayed silent  sitting across from the table a wise man hidden behind dark glasses and  madness .

So what do I owe you man ?
Umm Gonzo  man are you lost in thought or something ?

The young dork had just bared his angst ridden soul and now he thought to himself **** man I think it was to much for him no wonder he's gone insane from listening to my ******* .

It felt like a hour as he kept trying to get the poet known as Gonzo to respond .

He was about to get off his **** and shake him when a noise more fowl than Justin Biebers  voice broke the silence .

It was the biggest and longest  **** he had ever herd and smelled almost as bad as gonzo's demented long winded jokes .

Finally he showed signs of life oh dude I forgot to tip you so sorry **** I had the best  sleep of my life your better than listening to the newest Taylor Swift cd  hell I was like in a coma dam did you **** in here I swear you kids and your silly pranks it's okay kid I swiped your wallet.
You wont believe the **** I can pull when your asleep.

So you mean this whole time I been spilling my heart out to you thinking we were really becoming friends you were ******* asleep!?

Like a drunken baby after a good binge  in the trailer park amigo .

**** this !!

With that the young miserable moody *** teen hamster was gone and again gonzo was left to his thoughts to reflect on maybe he should have.
Aww **** that **** he said and cracked another fifth of bourbon and turned on some first class **** I'm talking bout the evening news hamsters get your minds out of the gutter.

Sure life can be total **** look at mine it's like a landfill of ******* crap.
But instead of being emotional *****.
I do what any grown man who lives a mobile bar does   .

Drink my liver silly and party my **** off writing ****** misspelled things to make people laugh and get hamsters to show me there ******* duh I'm just like Shakespeare  minus the talent and funny dungeons and dragons voice .

Until next time kids stay crazy.

Gonz

#funny #weird #dragons #******* #seamonkeys #awsome #bizzar #gaywrestlers