Valentine’s day
I had an idea
What if we made them
Boxes of brownies?
It’s a step up from chocolates,
They like my baking, too
We’ll make some for everyone else, too

With all these lies I tell,
how long until I’m the boy who cried wolf?

Will myself to sleep.
Will I go to sleep?
Too many thoughts.
Tired eyes,
Active mind.
I live my life wrapped up in lies.
It's quiet a bind.

Pull me in from shallow depths
Follow in my footsteps
Hide with me in shadows
Ignoring all that follows

Get away from trouble,
Come and play with bubbles!
No need to worry, anymore
That's too much of a chore

Be a better friend
All memories end
Fall into a puddle
Of never-ending sorrow
Maybe if you stay alive,
Some new help will arrive?
Or perhaps ask for it,
Combat it,
Find a will to survive.

A lonely, little, lacking Johnson
A limp lump without love
One lazy lick and he’s gone

It's normal
Been repeated
I've since been undefeated
But now
With her
I'll be standing lost and alone
And my stomach's all in shambles
My hearts been rearranged
My brain is overcrowded
Have I really been replaced?

A bit too much
A little over the top
That’s what I am!
But will I stop?
Non!
What are boundaries?
Those are purely guidelines, oui?
Rules don’t apply to me
I’ll do whatever I want

A word and a name.
We all meet her one day.
A girl named Destiny,
her majesty.
Our fate is her crown.

She’ll end you all,
begin you all.
She’ll make you sorry in the end.
Cuz she’s your Destiny,
her majesty.
Just by looking at her, knees bend.

But we fall.
We all fall.
And Destiny’s no exception.
With her life on the line,
it’s her life or mine.
An ultimate ultimatum.

Falling faster!
Can’t live without her!
This girl named Destiny,
it’s clear to see,
she only wants to help me.

Destiny
means so much more to me!
Not some false hope
or a pure mistake.
She’s my Destiny,
her majesty.

Perhaps if I believe,
believe in what I see,
I’ll be alright.
No instincts such as fight or flight...
If I believe in Destiny,
I’ll be alright.

With her, I’ll be alright.
Together, we’ll be alright.
I trust in her.
Believe in her.
Because Destiny owes me a favor
and I plan to collect.

As the streetlights flicker,
my face is wet with tears.
As the storm grows thicker,
I try to hide from my fears.

It’s not working.
Thunder isn’t thunder anymore.
It sounds like shouting.
People screaming themselves sore.

I’ll try to hide.
Cower in my bed.
But it sounds like a crashing tide,
and it won’t ******* END.

Stop, I whimpered.
Please, no, I cry.
But I can’t speak louder than a whisper,
no matter how hard I try.

Take it and take me,
let me provide with all I have left.
Even with all that’s been taken from me,
and what little I’ve been given,
I’ll give to you.
I’ll give it all up for you.
I’d do anything for you...
Just say the words.
I’m at your will,
just let me give!
I can only give,
it’s what I was taught
and what I will teach.
Now, take me.
Let me give up for you.
Give to you.
Give in to you.
All I can do is give.

I don't want a long life.
To grow old isn't my thing.
I wanna die free.
The vision I have is beautiful...
I'm walking to school,
the sky is blue,
the trees are full,
and the color came back to my world.
My vision shows me wearing black,
my hair in a ponytail,
and I'm standing tall,
isolated from my peers.
I'm calm
and before I die,
I take a nice, long breath.
I step off onto the street,
in front of school,
away from my peers,
away from the trees.
I'm standing still,
hand on my bag.
I'm finally happy.
Then...
A red car crashes into me.
Just what I wanted.
I'm finally dead.
Finally happy.
Truly happy.
I know that the world would be happier,
my mom would have the funds to live.
My friends might mourn,
but they have each other,
right?
They can help each other out,
that's what I'd want.
I want them to be happy,
but not with me there.
I want them to help each other,
and maybe my death will bring them together.
I want them happy,
I want them happy...
I want them...
happy?
God, I just don't know...

i'm a cheat sheet
a cheap sheet
look to me for answers
learn nothing yourself
maybe you tried before coming to me
or maybe you just forgot
i'll help,
i'll help,
no cost at all.
i have the answers
and you'll use me.
then discard me
and forget me.
just a last resort anyway.

I hate my birthday.
No point in celebrating
a day of pain
and almost death.
The day an accident
took it's first breath.

Write me,
the right me.
Capture my essence and trap it inside me.
Let the world see
this different side of me.

close your eyes
and hold me close.
oh dear,
hold me dearly to your heart.

it beats, and beats,
my love, you can't be beat.
it's strong, my will.
love you, i will.

i'm struck with grief!
i was struck by your handkerchief.
what have i done?
what have i done wrong?
.
.
.
you're too late, my dear
i'm off to war.
i'll see you soon
in a place on the sun.

at war with war,
no peace with peace.
in a war like this,
will the world stay in one piece?

with my back to france,
i'm back from france.
my darling,
i'm home.

the king,
oh yes,
i must see
the king.

he'll give me the news,
he'll catch me up.
i'll beg and plead
to make sure you're safe.

an hour of court.
he told me the news.
i can't wait
to be back with you.
.
.
.
cries of papa pierce the air.
i'm being hugged by two.
home, i'm here.
i'm here with you.

my darling cecilia,
i've missed you.
i've missed you dearly,
my darling.

little garth,
oh, how you've grown!
you're still a scrawny boy,
come, let us feast!
.
.
.
hours later,
we're finally alone.
garth in bed,
and the town at peace.

i'll grace your neck,
i'll pierce your skin.
i love you, my darling,
with all my being.

how war can change you,
how war has changed me.
the war has changed you too, dear.
is something wrong?

a strong case of disbelief,
i do think that's the case.
my dear, i'm alright.
i'm here, not dead but alive.

a long night of passion has met an end,
and our legs tangle in the bed.
now close your eyes,
and hold me close.

It's the little things that count.
Like little kids learning little skills.
Little girls chasing little boys.
Little blocks, stacked on top each other.

Or little girls, getting touched by big hands.
Little boys getting taken by big men.
Little kids with little skills.
Little kids who learn to count what little time they have.

jejune
jejuly
je t'aime, monsieur
je t'aime, mademoiselle

i love you,
i love you,
but i was too naive to realize i'm being used,
being used by you.

See one,
See two.
B 1.
B 17!
Bingo!

put something on,
something nice and very you.
don't make yourself uncomfortable,
just make do.

you look nice!
it's very you!
the color, the style, the shape,
it's very much you.

people are complimenting you.
they're looking at you!
quick, smile!
they want to see that gorgeous face.

time to play your instrument.
a nice, gorgeous cello
slotted right between your knees,
leaning on your chest.

there's a boy staring...
he seems to like your outfit.
his eyes are straying lower,
and even lower still.

your hand is trembling,
are you alright?
"yeah, i'm fine,
there's just something on my mind..."

that boy,
he seemed to like you.
he stared at your bare thighs from under your skirt.
he stared at your visible chest.

he looked at you like you were naked,
gazing your body hungrily.
at least he never touched you
or made you feel wanted.

later while shopping,
someone's hand came a little too close.
you arched away awkwardly
and ran away quickly.

that boy,
that hand...
they won't leave your mind.
why do you keep thinking about something so childish?

maybe tomorrow you'll wear something nice again.
something that's very you.
maybe just your birthday suit.
that's very you.

A little girl
who didn't know better.
A child
who was nothing worthwhile.
Only there for longing stares,
Only there for curious hands.
Big, scary, curious hands...
She might be at risk for something
oh, so dangerous.
But she'd never know.
She never knows.
She's just a little girl
with no world of her own.
When she's older,
maybe she'll be a little more aware
of her tiring, terrifying situation.
But no one can help.
They'd only laugh.
Wouldn't believe her.
Even while she's crying her heart out,
taking in deep, labored breaths...
Nobody's there.
Nobody was ever there for her.
And soon,
that same little girl
will be hanging
on her ceiling fan.

i can’t help,
but i try.
this might be the worse you’ve ever felt.
i’ll let you cry.

i wish i could promise it’ll be fine.
i wish i could promise it’ll be alright...
but all you can do is pine,
pine over your lost direction in life.

at least you said something,
at least you didn’t shut up.
don’t shut your mouth and say nothing,
don’t hesitate to interrupt.

don’t say it won’t last.
don’t say
don’t
don’t...

the wide expanse of space,
so empty
yet full of terrifying possibility.

like the snap of a finger,
the flick of a wrist.
a good day
can change
just
like
that.