Grey clouds gather and I can see them reflected in your eyes.
Grey clouds gather as we lay under these skies.

The rain comes down, we run from it all.
The rain comes down, will you catch me if I fall?

I don't want to read too deep,
Into the things you do,
Or the things that I see at night when I sleep.

But it is hard when you practically said that you love me,
It is hard when I don't know what you want this to be.

Am I just wasting time? Waiting for the words to be said.
Or am I just wasting time, is it all in my head?

I am used to you pulling ahead,
We should have kissed long ago,
My soul feels like led.

But maybe it simply feels like a bird,
I am ready to fly,
Ready for my cry to be heard.

I am filled with joy and fear all at the same time
Is this beating heart even mine?

The rain came down, I felt so alive,
The rain came down, I like when we just drive.

I think I finally realize, you are my cup of tea,
Come on friend, come and cut me free.

Come pick my petals and kiss me quick,
Come make my heart explode and make me your pick.

If you fill up my cup, can I fill yours too?
As this rain pours down, tell it can be true.

She died,
Blending into this holy world.
Of what was left of her,
Were her glistening eyes,
Looking upon us,
Gazing all the time,
Like shining stars,
In a night sky.
Her omnipresence,
Gave us hope,
While she cast,
Her blessings upon us,
Even when she  was,
Resting in another world.

I am a pit
You left me an emotionless object
All my life
Is gone
All my confidence
Is gone
All of my will
Gone

My reason to smile at little things
The constant subconscious beaming
The sweet smelling secrets
****** out of me
With a vengeful heartless twist
Of the sharpest dagger of all
The words that I swore
Would never be formed from your lips
That once loved me so tenderly
Or so I thought

I find myself driving at night
Fighting a war
But then I realize
I'm a pit

Im going to Alaska.
Away from all the things Ive known to harm me,
things like alcohol,
intermittent friendships,
and above all else
myself.

Leaving behind everything
with a whisk of fortunate flights
downed with a dash of relinquished hope.

Bringing the most harmful of all things with me
tucked behind reasons to live
and a view of astonishment I carry,
my thoughts

The one thing that has broken me delicately
I fester into my own brain stem
break open the doors and
flood my neurons to the point of drowning

Not a moment is left to breathe
To open the flood gates for release
My mind sits filled with thoughts of
everything about nothing

Giving me no reprieve to freedom
My thoughts and I sit
discussing things that make no sense to anyone
but us.

This is what Alaska has taught me.
Harvesting a neurological disease
with all the symptoms to show.
I broke down

I fell into Alaska
stumbling over my own pain
finding that my brain is
a rebellious sabotage of my freedom
running from all that I know.