Staying awake at odd hours is starting to be a continuous thing.
Thinking ,thinking,thinking.
That's all I've ever been able to do and to some people its what I do best.
But the thoughts that I think of would break you down in a heart beat and send chills down your spin.

I didn't always used to be this way,
Ironically
I was just a simple minded child who knew what they wanted in their future. As time flew by, so did my dreams and sooner or later I had nothing to look forward too.
No friends to trust.
No family to talk to.
Nothing.
And its sad how something can go to nothing in the blink of an eye.

The child kept pulling down his sleeves to hide the bruises from the one who he called mother. He felt so much pain and so much hurt and not because his skin was blue and purple but because his heart was too.All he did was try to make her proud but she wouldn't even look him in the eyes to say hello, and what came down to it all she said she had no son she could recall. He couldn't break the constant thoughts going through his head, who would of figured he'd put a bullet there instead...

I wish someone would make a poem about me, but I'm afraid of what their words might say. Would they say I make them happy or would they say I make them sad? But I've never known because no ones written one. I just hope instead of seeing the physical things I do I hope they realize the emotional things I feel. I want them to see galaxies in my eyes and warmth in my heart. I want them to see a person that's worth writing about, I want them to see me. The real me.

We are young and emotional and we are crazy in love, every time I say your name my breathing starts to thicken and my mind goes blank. When are lips first met I didn't know what I was doing but I knew it was right and we both wanted it. When it happened I felt like I could do anything in the world right at that moment, I felt like I was free. You make me happy and without effort too. Every time I think about your beautiful smile my body starts to tingle and my temperature increases. I tend to think to myself "How did such a beautiful human being fall in love with me?" I don't know how or why but you just did and honestly I couldn't ask for anything more.

I'm glad you came into my life, and I never want you to leave. My beautiful girl.

She was little when it started,
The constant remarks made behind her back.
They never seemed to stop and one day she listened.

They pinched at her arms and called them fat,
So she started wearing sleeves,
even though her arms were perfect.

They pulled at her hair and called it *****,
So she started wearing beanies/ hats,
Even though her hair was gorgeous.

They called her conceited,
So she believed she was ugly,
even though She was a masterpiece.

They called her teeth yellow,
So she stopped smiling,
even though it was beautiful.

They called her annoying,
So she stopped talking,
even though her voice was lovely.


They told her she was useless,
So she stopped trying,
even though she meant the world to some people..

When I was younger I use to dream about who I would become in the future and what things I wanted to do but now that I'm here its like over the years people crushed those dream and devoured them. Now I can't even see my future. I don't even know what my goal is anymore.... Reality isn't a thing anymore. Everyone ******* it up with what they thought is reality. So in reality there is no reality. When the depth of your soul devours your mind theres not much you can do but watch, and When smiles turn into frowns and light turns into darkness all we've ever done was run from it, But when the last drop of blood is shed were will we run to next?

Everyday I grieve thinking about the people I loved but could never express the right emotions. I ask myself day and night why I still try but I ignore the fact that I know the answer. I'm tired of everyone finding someone they're so compatible while I sit and wonder what's so wrong with me.
Is it because I'm young?
Is it because I don't have a models body?
Or is it because I know no one will love me because of who I am?...
Everyone will forget me.
Everyone will disappear.
I felt so stupid thinking that I was strong enough to move on with this feeling but its gotten strong and I have gotten weaker...so the only simple thing to do is....
Be forgotten.