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 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Redecorating
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Carefully removing posters from the wall
But the tape always catches
And rips at the edges,
Never careful enough
And like the tape
I never escape
Without a piece of them
Always with me
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Fever Dream
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
It was all real
For a moment
And I was sad
When I woke
But happy to have
Spent an hour with you
Even in the shortest naps
I live lifetimes with you
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
24/7
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Your sun has set,
And my butterflies flew away
But even under your moon,
I'm drawn to you like a moth to a flame
Your flame so bright,
With a purplish hue,
I'll try every night,
To get closer to you
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
I'm not good with money, a budget never could manage me, I hate when it's sunny, I prefer rain and a breeze.

I can be silent for days on end, can't even bring myself to sing, easily broken yet hard to bend, my mind is a stubborn thing.

Sometimes I get lost way too deep in my thoughts, have fun trying to guide me away, and I'm sensitive too don't yell in my room, it'll just activate the rage.

And God I get mean, inconsiderate and spiteful, with nowhere to lean, I'll feel my anger is rightful.

My hair clogs the drain, it's long and disarray, you won't get my brain, I cry like every other day.

I can't do my makeup, my eyelids don't shine gold, I'll threaten a break up, the second I feel you're cold.

I'll have the last word, everytime we disagree, I don't know if you've heard, but you shouldn't love me.
And Sweet boy I love you
But I'm a real mess
If I focus on the bad
It causes less distress
I can't focus on our good
When I'm trying to lay us to rest
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Current-ly
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
These feelings flow out of the corners of my eyes like river rapids and pool all around me. Every time I think I can come up for air I start to drown again. And I'm searching for anything to keep me afloat but all I see is you, and the waves come crashing again.
A place once so safe,
A person made a home,
Now cold as a wraith,
Leaving me alone.
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Bus Stopped
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
I hang onto your every last word like it's the last bus home at midnight but the driver is inconsistent and now I'm stranded.
Do I wait under the flickering lights
Or
Do I start my walk home alone
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Star Reader
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
And I'll look at the sky and search through the stars for validation of this feeling, and when I find the moon I'll think of you and suddenly my heart is reeling,
Do you look to cosmos and wonder where my mind goes when suddenly I am silent?
I'm just lost in your brown eyes hoping you realize that maybe you want this too.
But maybe you won't and I study stars all alone, finding signs that were never really there.
But I've read them constellation for constellation,
Searching for the love we share.
Some nights I find it and others I don't, but I blame that on the clouds, if we can't see it I promise you'll hear it,
My love for you is quite loud.
If you look at the moon
When I look at the moon
Can you feel me?
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
7x7=49
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
It's the first snow during the last year you believe in Christmas magic,
It's the desire to watch the tornado form even though the storm is heavy,
It's 9 am on the first fall morning of your freshman year of high-school,
It's your favorite sweater fresh out of the dryer,
It's the warmth from your mug of coffee radiating to your palms at 5 am,
It's the last laugh at your first slumber party before you fall asleep,
It's the sun creeping over the trees,
It's the sound of your Playstation starting up after a 3 month hiatus,
It's Thursday,
It's orange sun rays warming my skin,
It's a thick navy blue university that you never went to sweater,
It's fuzzy slippers,
It's Holiday themed squishmallows,
It's potato soup that your mom makes on Sunday,
It's cookie dough ice cream at midnight,
It's a warm cinnamon roll in the morning,
It's the number 22,
It's the way that when I close my eyes all I think of is you.
My feelings for you I can't describe,
But reading these instances you'll get the vibe,
It's just too simple to say I feel safe,
But in your arms I've found my place.
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Lonely and craving the feel of touch,
The electricity from skin to skin,
The magnetic pull from eye contact,
The I love yous and I miss yous.

But it's a craving best left unfed
To be touched is to be vulnerable and the electricity shocks my brain, the I love yous and I miss yous make me feel insane,
To look at me too long is to pick apart my flaws, and at the end of the day I'm better alone after all.
I don't know what does it,
I'm ****** in the head
But when I fall in love,
I tear it apart til it's dead
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
I'd keep the walls down but
Everytime I let hope remove the bricks
I take arrows to my chest.

I think it might be best
To keep the concrete high
And nurse my wounds in private this time.
My fingers are calloused
My skin is burned
My thoughts now are malice
From the patterns I've learned
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