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 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Apparition
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
I just want someone to look at me
To see me,
For all that I am
Look AT me-
Not through me
And past where I stand

I just want someone to know me,
To feel me,
To want who I am

And for a second,
Quite briefly,
I think our eyes met
And that scared me so bad
I immediately left
I crave quiet understanding
But the chaos is too loud
Once I was finally seen
The fear took all my sound
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Hypoxemia
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Is it better to have what you want
Or what you need?
This question bothers me every night
Why can't what I need be what I want,
And why can't I want what I need?

Now that I want you
I don't really need you
I need the air that I breathe
But I didn't want it
Until I had you

So maybe I need you after all
And the mind goes round and round and back and forth
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Surface Level
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Everything's on the surface
Any deeper I start getting nervous
But your voice is so calming,
Your vulnerability enthralling

NO, I can't let you know me
I can't let you see
I can't let you find out
I'm 95% self doubt

My favorite color is green
At times I can be mean
I still watch Disney movies
-why does it feel like you're looking right through me?

And I'll preach I'm an open book
Lay it out, have a look
But the more you flip my pages
And start to see where the rage is-

The book will be snatched
The relationship crashed
You'll wonder why,
You might even cry

It's nothing to mourn
Don't be forlorn
Let's not get disheveled
Baby I'm just surface level
I can't believe you got past chapter two
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Honeybun
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
His love was,
Soft like the rain on a foggy morning,
Mesmerizing like a summertime sunrise,
Calming like a cool breeze through the autumn trees,
Safe like your favorite blanket after a scary movie,
Warm like holding your favorite mug full of tea in your hands,
And it was mine,
Until it wasn't.
And the absence of it has left a crater I don't know how to fill
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Grip
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Did you bleed because you ache for me
Or because I wouldn't let go?
I'd be holding on still if my nails didn't break
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
I'm restless
I'm aching
I want you to text me

I'm texting
I'm pacing
I want you to text me

I'm staring
I'm crying
I want you to text me

I'm shaking
I'm numb
You're not gonna text me
Yet I keep texting you
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Chai Latte
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
I poured out my heart
But your cup was gone
Now I'm left all over the floor
I'm always too late
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Too Much
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
Too much talking
Too much noise
Too much kissing
Too much touching
Too much laughing
Too much crying
Too much fighting
Too much typing
Too much calling
Too much singing
You were never too much for me
This silence is though
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
My fingers swipe away
Every instinct telling me to text you
Your fingers swipe away
Every instinct telling you not to respond
And every response takes longer
And I can hold out a little more
But I wonder if I'm in your head
Cause I can't do this anymore
I miss you
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
0000
 Dec 2024 Jay
Kalliope
You're an hour behind
And I'm an hour ahead
We never could meet at the right time
I'll bust my clock to wait for you tho
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