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2 am and i can't sleep
wide awake too tired to weep
funny how feelings
can make you weak
it's a long road, rough and steep
just hope i find the peace i seek.

people are so sweet and kind
if only they could help unwind
the tortured ropes within my mind
could help me break
the chains that bind
only God can help me find
bless'd release from this
pain which grinds

carrying a sack of stones
is no weight to bear alone
it will break my very bones
i want to cry, but will not groan
what I must do is clearly shown
i must be humble and atone.

i've got a message to be spread
been writing vanity instead
when all is done, all is said
when pretense is finally shed
is it truth or lies i've fed
my fire, in truth, is almost dead.

try and understand, my friends
no matter what the current trends
this path we're on
has trech'rous bends
the broad way winds
the narrow wends
but all paths DO have their END.

though i have been torn apart
it is time for a new start
strength comes from
the peaceful heart...


(c) soulsurvivor
Haven't written about
The Lord Jesus Christ in
Some time... it's high time I did.

I'm only on site a short time
As I can only write late at night.
I want to thank you all for sharing
Your well wishes with me...
They are appreciated more than
You could know.

I'm going to be FINE.
Just experiencing a rough patch.
As are we all... I'll be back to
Read again soon!
They say if you love something set it free
If it returns, it’s yours.
If it doesn’t
then it never was meant to be.  

But, often times
I wonder What’s worse?
If our time together
Was a blessing or a curse?

Trying to hold on to something
With hope and faith alone.
Or having confirmation that in
your arms, I never belonged.

How could you possibly decide
the lesser evil of those two?
When every road or path I take
Seems to lead back to you?

Should I close my eyes
And flip a coin?
Or go on living life without ever knowing
If the loss of our love I’d mourn?

Well... all the cards in
my hand I’ve played.
For the chance to see
If you’d fly away or by my side you’d stay

It’s a hard fact of life I have learned
Just because you love someone
It doesn’t mean your love
they deserved

Today I set you free my love
To move on and Soar free
To find your hearts desire
Since it simply wasn’t me

One day I imagine you’ll
Reflect upon our love
I hope you’ll wonder
If by chance it had been sent from above
This is for the man I loved but could never truly have.
If I could love
the limping
ugly
afraid
part of me
That I drag through the mud
and thorns

If I could let
the transparent
clawing
screaming
silhouette speak
Instead of kicking it
into the basement

If I could put
my deepest human essence
onto paper
for everyone to see

Then.
Then, I could be free.
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