Wherever you are
I don't want to see you
Hands in the rain
Grasping an umbrella
Long fallen to your side
Your hair's wet
But you know that

Staying at home
Your coffee is cold
Mixing up the sugar
Won't bring it all back
Biting your lip
For the avoidance in the eyes
Of your own reflection

Tears well up
Let them fall down
Mourn the grave
That you made
Let yourself be sad
I love you so much
But I'm not coming back

I wish I was
A blank page
So perfectly clean
Nothing to see
Nothing to fear
No disorders
No skeletons
In closets
No dusty corners
Filled with secrets
No quiet tears
No sleepless nights
Just a blank page
Ready for life

My thoughts and feelings
are carved into the sky
shining bright and bold,
sheer perfection and dreams,
strength and bravery, truth
and existence, reason and
light, freedom and flight,
a life I have come to understand
in complete clarity. I once
left life to return to life,
to embrace everything around
me and feel nations ignite
and rise inside my invention.
to know that I am the source
standing in embroidered designs,
the incandescent poet soaring
in the skies beyond endless
galaxies.

Sugar rushed
From your bedroom to the mountains
Where I was pushed
Left to fall
Cosseted by them all, their encouragements from the top
why was I going down?
Head first, limbs here and there
You were here, then there
Traced back on my back,
Black on black
So dark you could see the dust, and the dog hair
Stars from afar

You can rest now,
don’t worry.
We’ll be okay.

Because of you
we survived;
we get to see another day.

You did so well,
there’s no doubt,
but I wish you were still here.

A hero’s death
is always sad,
but yours brought a million tears.