'new year, new me'*

I won't be a new me this year.

No, I'm going to be an upgraded version of myself.

I won't become the person I always aspired to be.

No, I'm going to push myself to fix all the wrong things with me.

A prototype and a completed project.

I'm going to create a better me, not a new one.

Why should I cry
He did this to himself

Am not sad
why should I be

It's a beautiful night
the weather is nice
and am enjoying my cigarette

A little over a week away from Christmas and it's seventy degrees in Philadelphia

In this household, the Christmas tree has no plans on going up this year and presents aren't in my near future

This is a summary of 2015

I heard you talking

You said
you were over all the noise and she kept calling and texting
Those messages going unanswered

He laughed
Saying he understood and the same happened to him

I stayed put
Listening
And waiting
And waiting
For the perfect time to exit


Just like I am still
Waiting for an answer to my messages

you linger on me
my invisible friend
and keep me lonely
late at night.

remember last week
you said
we were in love
it sounded so strange
coming out of your mouth.

do you still think of me
when you're alone?
do i haunt your nights
like you haunt mine?
or am i a shadow of a memory
another girl left behind.