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Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
your ex girlfriend is actually lovely
and i should have been
angry at you not her
im not angry at her at all
do you know what she did
she texted me one thursday night
do you know what she said
she said sorry
she said this is so long overdue
she said i really really hope
we can be friends
do you know what i did
i let go that thursday night
do you know what i said
i said im sorry too
i said its okay
i said i would really really love
to be friends
do you know what you never did
you never spoke to me first
do you know what you never said
you never said i know i hurt you but you hurt me too
you never said can we talk about it
you never said i really really think
we can be friends
so i dont even know if we are
or if ive suddenly become
an optimist
64 · Apr 2020
Untitled #7
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
I can’t decide if
knowing the truth hurts more
than staying in the dark
because not knowing means
I will always
hope too much
and knowing means
I will never
hope again.
64 · May 2020
Lonely
Josephine Wilea May 2020
Look there's the mail truck oh wait it didn't stop.
Journal! Yes, I haven't journaled in quite some time!
Hey so do you maybe wanna FT or something tonight?
Succulents need some water that aloe is lookin' a bit dry.
The calendar it's May 8th now not May 7th.
Only sent it 21 minutes ago give her time to respond.
First real cry in three months.
Musicmusicmusicmusicmusicmusicmusicmusic.
She's probably busy like a normal person don't be clingy.
He sent that text last week I should answer but should I?
She responded see I'm gonna have a fun time tonight.
That's alright don't worry go deal with your fam no it's fine.
But do you have just a minute no okay goodnight.
Will you just talk to me please?
I just need someone to hold me never let go.
Please?
I'm going insane with loneliness please someone just talk to me.
63 · Apr 2020
Untitled #9
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
i wouldn't say i'm
"catching feels"
because i caught them
captured them
pounced on them
a good while ago.

i wouldn't say i'm
"heartbroken"
because i have been
heartshattered
heartcrushed
for a good while.
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
sure you said sorry
i even think you meant it
i know you meant it
but you dont act sorry
62 · Sep 2020
Untitled #19
Josephine Wilea Sep 2020
Even an episode of
Grey's Anatomy
brings it all back.
61 · Mar 2020
Untitled
Josephine Wilea Mar 2020
i made her smile
.
.
.
that's all.
58 · Jul 2020
Untitled #17
Josephine Wilea Jul 2020
She was there for you
When I had to be there for myself

    -  The only thing I cannot compete with.
57 · Mar 2020
Untitled
Josephine Wilea Mar 2020
and i know
that to you
it's just a game

but you know
exactly how to
make my heart ache
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
no one is me
do you miss me
maybe you miss me
i hope you miss me so much
that is feels like your
esophagus is ripped out
when i say your name *
dont worry i wont say your name
i say it enough in my head
i hear it enough from my friends
but dont worry im not tired of it
one day i will finally
have the ovaries
to say all of this
but until then
maybe youll find
my hello poetry account.
56 · Jan 2020
You Are
Josephine Wilea Jan 2020
You are my cropped leggings
You are my movie theater M&M's
You are my ridged fingernails
You are my slouchy green shirt
You are my knit blanket
You are my heavy backpack
You are my coconut oil popcorn
You are my frizzy hair
You are my softly scarred arms
You are eVerYthiNg
and I hate it
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
and you take pleasure it seems
in ripping my esophagus out
because some nights
you act like were best friends again
andihopesosomuchwewillbe
and some nights
you wont even answer me
and it hurts so much
ive been trying not to cry anymore
but it hurts so much
and im so confused
just be honest with me
please
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
and let me tell you
let me tell you something
im so ******* tired of my *******
im tired of my *******
allowing your *******
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
and this so long overdue
but im making up for it now
oh im making up for it
and you be ready do you know why
you be ready because
im not doing it anymore
im not being polite
im not giving you the benefit of the doubt
without telling me the real reason
why you lied
why you ignored me
why you messed with me
why you are
still doing it
Josephine Wilea Mar 2020
how could i have not known for so long
how could you not have told me
and lets be ******* honest for once
please
we both knew that i knew
ive been lying to myself
because i knew all along
i knew you were capable of
i knew you maybe already had
i knew you still were
49 · Feb 2020
winter beach
Josephine Wilea Feb 2020
we were going to get married
on the beach
barefoot
in the dead of winter
partly because we loved
the cold salty air
partly because we wanted
to defy the norms
we certainly did.
#winter #beach #love
Josephine Wilea Apr 2020
i love you so much
just as a friend too as a person
you used to love me so much
how could you have possibly
just turned it off
will you please tell me how
i havent been able to
and im tired of loving you
and not being loved back
dont you understand
thats all ive ever wanted
thats all i want
just please love me back

— The End —