My death will be liberating.

And I do not say that in the sense
that I am going to find a cliff
and take a good jump off.

No.

I am just trying to find a
clever way to tell you

that I do not know what is going
to happen next.

You see,

there is a
fine line
between
dreaming and
mortality

and

I am finding out for myself
that being in love
does not always
involve

being awake.

And for my sake
I fall in love with daydreams,
nightmares,
hazy realities
and

the hung-over idea

of not being enough.

It is all out of my hands.
                 It is all out of time.

And the only thing I have left to do,
now,


is decide.

I still pause,
before I speak your name.
As I steal another's breath.
In my dreams I'm still in love with you.
So at times you catch me when I'm awake.
I imagine galxies colliding,
if again I could look into your eyes.
Know my skin is still white,
From where your hands were gripping.
You sense that I'm still lost,
Somewhere between our sheets.
Twirling forever,
To the melodies of your breathing,
and to the twitching of your knees.
I would lay down for this battle,
you've already won my dear.
Hours and hours spent watching your ghost, dance over aging hard wood floors.
Rain taps steadily against the windowsill,
keeping one ear with the moment,
Knowing I can't lose myself in you.

I want to see the flowers in the day
Just as I feel the ocean breeze
I want to see the sunset when the sun goes away
I want to swim in nature so deep
What can you see outside?
Nothing but the pitch black of the night

I want to cry at ethereal sights
I want to understand the colors of things
I want to feel what others feel inside
When they see mountains, what joy it brings
When waterfalls roar, and birds fly
I can only appreciate the magnificent divine

As I close my eyes when I get tired
Nature is as beautiful unseen
I feel the wind, rain, and fire
Everything is as marvelous just as I dream
Is it as beautiful as it is in my mind?
Says an old man who is blind