You are not the love of my life,
You are the life of my love ❤️

A constant is control
Your every surrounding contains a constant
Constantly ever changing
in what ways are we shaped by our own constant?
Our society?
How does it mold our perception?
it is but a constant
I am who I am
I can only hope that
creativity defines me
As my flaws weave through each definitive line of my life
And My colors define me with each shade of its own
It was once spoken that
“Imagination was greater than knowledge”
Because It is all its own.
Creativity is freedom 🖤

F* this *****
In reality I hate this
But he shall never know How much exactly
It hurts this time.
How could I let myself fall
Why did I let myself fall so deep into someone I barely know.
It doesn’t make sense.
It never seems to, why this, why now?
What was it about him?
Why does this seem to make so much sense yet the timing does not. Maybe I am wrong, but when I’m with him it feels exactly right.
Everything, his smell, his touch, his smile, his eyes that tell me so much more.
It’s there, I know it, I feel it, I’m not crazy.
But This is crazy.
This is more real than anything I’ve ever come across, much more.
And I was meant to teach him, just as he Was meant to teach me.
I can’t shut this door, not completely, so I will leave it cracked, just so I can check in and see my love every now and then.
to make sure he’s okay, and that he still thinks of me as I think of him.
I never told you I loved you
And again the possibilities are endless, just like the love we never got to build or express.
And yet maybe one day.

For now I will let you go
I still feel you
I always will
But this is me
And it is time
For i will Kiss you goodbye
For every nights sky has its last star

Dear Daughter,

Always be Weird and eccentric.
Always be unique and different.
Light up the world with all your greatest passions.
And understand that relationships Are sacred.

For your signature is forever written.
In the sands of time
this world has given.
Always reminding you.
That there’s no one else like you.

Understand that,
You can change things.
Things bigger than ourselves.

Be in the moment.
As it is.
And listen for the answers.
God will give.

🖤
-Mom

Love is complete freedom.
The freedom to be yourself, to be free of all worries and doubts.
To understand you without thought.
We’ve met once before.
To feel your entire existence as
My hands become your hands and your hands become mine.
And In that moment I float away with freedom.

This color is primary
Solid and definite
It’s an original piece of art
primal,
Created from the beginning of time
It belongs to the rainbows and indefinite skys
And it shines within the oceans and paints the days with it’s reflection
its the best I can describe
There are a few of us that possess this color
As it lives within our eyes
This color is primary,
Definite and never forgotten

Content.
I am content with every move that I make.
I can float as high as the universe allows me.
Even gravity couldn’t hold me down.
I float Higher than the brightest skys.
My shadow no longer to be seen.
And then i fall like the rain as it hits my windshield.
I am content.
Content with this motionless feeling.

They say….
“you sweep the stars Unwittingly….”       

Just..        
Searching for your place in this world.

I was always so sure of a pure Soul.
But we’re all tainted in some way.
Born sinners.
Our Shadows linger In the dark.
Close your eyes;
Getting Lost in this paradox.
As we Learn to live
Live In the freedom of all things.
All things Loved and created. 🖤

When I met you, everything Started to make sense
And my life Began to come together
You had that ability
That one of a kind ability
to unlock the most beautiful part of myself
So beautiful, I didn’t even recognize her
You held that
You always held that
As I had always held yours

Words are powerful
Words can change the mind
Words can express
Words can communicate
They portray real emotion, meaning
Words can inspire
They sing and dance
Words could detonate within these intrigued minds of ours
Words are creative, free flowing
Words could change your life
Change the world
They travel
To every inch of our universe
words are powerful

And she walked away;
Wandering the earth with her bare hands.
Open to the world beside her. ❤️

When these buried emotions come to surface, they’re unexplained, unrecognizable. They can sometimes be Overwhelming. So much so that I’ve lost control of them, I don’t know what to do or where to go, or how to direct them. They explode like a million fireworks that fly in all different directions. How beautiful they are yet intriguingly unorthodox.
Each one a different color that represent every part of me and they blend together almost like a picture.
But then the picture fades and that’s when reality is no longer valid, without a picture there can be no reality. Just a blur of lost thoughts with no direction.
My sense of self has yet been lost again, so let me swim in this blur for just a moment without judgement and I promise you that reality will return as it always does.
And in that one moment that comes to pass ever so often, it can be unique, undeniably intriguing, yet hard to understand. It’s okay to let go of reality sometimes, for these brilliant colors can not be suppressed forever, and as time comes to an end, your artwork will be finished and the picture you have unwillingly painted will be clear to see.

We learn that one day,

you speak into existence.

I know love is real
For I have held hands with the angels
And tasted what is evil
For I have touched the colors of the unseen.
And drowned in the darkest of hours
How beautiful?
This conundrum.
For One can not exist without the other.
Almost like a love between two souls
As one can not exist without the other
How beautifully ironic
This thing they call love

And I sit and wait
Wait for your letter
Of unknown words of love and wisdom
Have you found it yet
What you’ve been searching for?
Have you climbed mountains yet?
Have you ran for miles and miles across the open fields of glorious unanswered questions?
Have you traveled to every star?Have you seen the eyes of every soul? the ones that behold the look of true magic?
Have you found it yet,
Have you found what you’ve been searching for?
Have you found you?

I see you.
Peeking in,
From behind the trees.

74 degrees,
1886,
Conversing only with the deep,
The ones that know.
Living each and every moment,
Dancing to the synchronized music.
Every blossom blooms with integrity.
And The rose pedals dance from the raindrops in the sky.

This love is infinite.
It was just as though;
I already knew it to be.
It was when our hands first met.
For the first time,
I came home.
It was when you asked me,
Can I kiss you?
And For the first time
i saw you.

I feel nothing now
My hands are numb as I write this down
My feet crumble beneath me with knees of no stability
I feel nothing now
I re-read these beautiful poems of the past I wrote just for you
And as I read them
I feel nothing now
I built a tower just for you
And decided to burn it to the ground
The remains of these broken ashes burn with everything I had felt for you
I feel nothing now
I sacrificed my pride and everything else just to put my heart on your table
That table is empty now
With nothing left but blood stained pain written in your name
I feel nothing now

This world,
It doesn’t fit with you

Id felt drawn to the stars
Just as I do the universe
Put here, perfectly in place
Drawn to the earth as my hands trace each constellation that made me
Another life to live and read over
Then the sky turns black
The stars no longer to be seen
And so it begins

How I feel timeless in the present, wreckless in the past and consistent in the future may never compromise my free spirit.
For I have no control,
only thoughts and they soar high above the universe as they reflect off the ocean with a single glimpse of our souls.
The stars spoke.
For I have touched them with untold stories.
And we speak to them unconsciously and unaware of our entire selves. ❤️

Do you know now?
Do you know that you’re perfect?
Do you know that the beauty I see within you is the magical kind
Do you know now?
Do you know that I am in love you as you are with me?
For it is real this time.
This love we both endlessly thought could never be found
But you had found me
You sought me out with no hesitation
No restriction
That gravity pull you once explained to me that couldn’t be explained
it was This kind of love that created the mountains we seek.
And Even all the colors of the rainbow couldn’t be enough you know
For we are a color all it’s own
Created between us
For These colors,
god gave us
Do you know now?
Can you see now?
These colors of our own serenity ❤️

Ego is evil
Ego is shallow
Ego is society’s self image
Ego is a false sense of self worth
It demeans others
Ego thinks he’s better
A false sense of perception
Ego only masks our insecurities
Ego strips us from love and light
It is transparent
Ego is evil
Ego is a gift from the devil
It consumes us with darkness

There you are.
I see you.
Your eyes tell me so many stories.
Colors so transparent;
As they paint the sky’s  Gray and blue.
We danced again.  
Underneath every star that could see us, as their reflection touched ours.
Perfectly placed,
as my body moved the way yours did.
Underneath the spotlight of the universe,
Tracing the stars, as we gently cross over each constellation.
Bringing a sense of completeness to the world as it fades out behind us.
I see you.
I could feel the music flow through my fingertips as our hands slowly come together.
These Colors swirled around us in shades I’ve never seen before.
Blending together as one.
Synchronizing to the sound of music
As it played Yellow.
With such grace as it flows with every step we make.
There you are.
I see you. ❤️

I believe that Love….
It chooses us.

It’s Wild and free…..
An untamable thing.

And when our eyes first met, i became lost in some world that we made.
A place Where No one else could see us;
Where no one else could reach us.

I could have swore I’d been here before.
Are you sure we’ve never met?

Watching you watching me.
Your eyes held such a familiar story…one that my heart was bearing.

..And That’s when I knew, that it was you.
Your eyes…they told me everything.
About a time where my soul was once yours and yours was once mine.

Are you sure we’ve never met?

Eyes closed;
My fingers gently glide across.

These Mountains of records;
Scattered every which way.

Breathe in,
As I browse through every artist...

That has changed the world. ❤️

The wind blows softly against my skin,
As my hands flow with the music that it makes.
But these treetops You see,
They stifle against them.
These treetops,
So busy they seem.
Fighting To stay in one place.
But Ironically so.
their leaves;
they carry & let go.
They Fly without remorse or reason.
As they travel without trying.
Without telling.
Without fighting.
❤️

What is time if it not wasted,
As it stands with our lives given,
Souls unstable ,
As the world keeps spinning
Is it not enough?
Is this not enough?
Enough love given? pain felt, as we re-live
the same, yet not so similar stories.
Re-playing each one with the sound of our own music.
My favorite record on repeat.
Love sings to me, As i touch it and feel it with every part of who I am.
Im in love with love.
Who wouldn’t be?
It’s beauty of an indescribable existence.
It’s mystery of a perfect yet unorthodox connection.
The connection of freedom and all its gifts given.
I’m in love with love.
Who wouldn’t be? ❤️