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Apr 2020 · 126
Untitled feelings
Justice Apr 2020
I can’t get outa my head
I can’t get outa my head
My love for you is dead
My love for you is dead
I can’t get outa bed
When the Loneliness sets in
I wish I was I dead
Can’t you read my mind
You'll never feel alike
I’m always loosin time
Nothing feels right
Now that we’re behind
I think it’s time to cry
I don’t wanna try
You took to much
Of me
Used me up
But now I’m free
From us
I’m still lost in what once was
wasn’t our fault the love just took off from us
But now it’s a game of hot an cold
Feelin froze I just freeze
I suffer mentally
Do me a favour and just put an end to me
Like you took the rest of me
Whys life got to be so ******* messy
Why can’t i stop obsessing

if you break my heart on the daily
it’s safe to say i’m the one who’s crazy
i’m just scared so please don’t blame me
i can’t lose you It's true boo
It’d drive me crazy
But If the love is lost Ill be gone in awe
Something's wrong I think i've lost all


i would do anything
i would do everything
but the pain you bring is my ending
you don’t know what you did
you broke my heart
you killed me from the start
but i chose this
and hurts but i wrote this
i can’t put it into words i’m hopeless
i love you and i need you to know this
i know haven't showed it
but i promise
i ain’t jokin
even though
it kills me inside
to have even spoken
believe me i tried i wish this was lie
but every single time
i open my mouth
i melt
all the pressure amounts
i’m just surrounded
by a cloud
of anxiety and doubt
so this is me speaking now
i ******* love you wow that feels good to say
never thought i see the day
how ******* sad
but if i can’t make you laugh hey
that’s truly the tragedy
i want nothing more than to see you happy
see you happy
happy
Nov 2019 · 146
X-X-X
Justice Nov 2019
I’m broken,  lost and I don’t know where to go
Don’t know which ways home
Or even where I’m from
So listen while I explain that I’m not from your world but I’m still the same
Insane emotional vocal
People say he’s gon for loca
Take this from what is
It’s a joka
Or maybe that’s just me
Never know never truly see
Wish I could Think hear and feel
What it would mean to me just to be real
Not have to conceal all this anxiety inside of me
Now I would never lie to me
So i sit and think quietly
Talk to the walls in my head
A man whose story's never been read
A man who might just be better of dead
A man better off left unsaid

Unspoken he’s lonely lost and broken
Just lookin for his place
Walking down this path of forgotten memories
His sadness is the only one in his Mentionings
He came here alone tonight
He must live a lonely life
I couldn’t pain my self to think twice
Now this could be me or you
You need to see and choose
Live a life
Don’t fall causality
Don't let this become your reality
----- ?
Nov 2019 · 161
Scars
Justice Nov 2019
I don’t know where we will go
But that don’t matter so
We can get closer now
Never been a poster child
Always been the lonely type
Cold only broken Type
Who never really fit in
Was never really driven
But now he feels like he’s been freed from prison
Risson from the grave dead man walking slave
My soul is all I ever gave
I never knew someone would just take
Someone that could just be fake
A ******* snake
They walk all over you
Emotional abuse turn you back into your mind recluse

It’s not something you choose
You win some you lose
You’ll End up with a scar
End up at a bar
Been up drinking all night
Drinking without them
Drinking about them
Never out run them
Always there like a free friend
Maybe I’ve just weakened
Maybe I’ve just peaked but

Scars are what make us
So great or so anxious
So listen to me now
And let me tell you  how
The world is a broken heart
And sure we all fall apart
But that’s what brings us together
Our feelings of pain are what make us
They break us apart
They hold us as one
They teach us lessons
Our strange little confessions
And let us know that we are who we are everywhere we go
And let everyone else know we’ve seen some ****, and are healing dealing and treading our own weight from now on
Lets let our scars set us straight


You never know
So before you go
I want to tell you
Scars are what make us
Nov 2019 · 232
First draft written path
Justice Nov 2019
Some days I just lye awake
I don’t know why or how nothing I can ever take to get rid of this feeling
There’s nothing I do I’m trapped in my own mind in own time I just rewind reflect I need to be checked my mental status is on a new apparatus
That is just how it is and it will be forever me but I can’t explain that I’m in love with the feeling that I will never get better no matter the weather out side it’s always cloudy in my brain I feel like I’m in sane and I love it I cry I’m depressed re obsessed with the way my mind thinks that it’s ok to be this way but this is how I see the day on the daily and lately I thought I was mapping it out turns out i was farther from the truth then I have ever been and this I’ve already seen. Been there done that I’m done with this crap i wish it was over but I can’t end the pain that keeps me alive because if I’m not in it I don’t know, who am I

You ever look up and feel the sky
Try to think can’t find a single reason why,
Are you dead and or alive
Like what’s inside
All that hard ****, ******* know we tried but never had the best of times
Always looked for the light though we felt it die each try  
It’s written down now get in the ground
This is the sound of repression now
Sound cloud rapper with depression how stereotypical, slip knot music video while I slit my wrists how sick is this
How twisted do I need to get
Enough to feed the fit
Get me too get treated
I can’t help it I got a disease
****** up mentally
Forget my recipe

This is the way it was  not how it has to be how could we passively self destruct our own lives and not know it **** few more and would’ve blown it when I’m angry I just throw it, it’s just how I go through it, just how I knew it , blows up in my face every time shows up in every rhyme don’t know why just so angry it pains me I’m flaming at the the top prepaired  for that massive drop,  beat hit needle on the record. Calm and wreck less like twin injections this complextion got your head re derectin in every wich way checkin
For my flexin, hit the motor plex an decide to keep right, right where I want you i own you I pown  you
I guess you got to wake up to invent you’re own destiny
Formulate a plan become lyrical Peter Pan  
Got you lookin like a meter man
Now I know your not man made  
Put down this charade Or you’re gonna need clinic aid
Written spitten pain


Guess I’m just a rap guy
Guess I’m just a sad guy
Guess I’m just a mad guy
Guess I’m not a good guy
Guess I’ll say good bye
Give me advice
Sep 2019 · 286
I guess we’ll see
Justice Sep 2019
I can’t tell you how much it hurts
When it starts and it doesn’t stop
It’s gonna **** me
I’m in a cell and this game is hell
Girl with you I can’t tell
It’s a stand still
This wieght you’re putting on me is heavier than anvil
I want to just cancel
All of our plans I’m mad still
When you do this
I confuse us
With the true us
But it’s delirious
I need to slow down take this serious
And finally ask the question
Am I just begging for your attention
Or do you feel the tension
The push the pull
It’ll roll you away
Like a peaceful melody
I guess I finally got to say what I wanted
Let’s just see how she responded



We used to talk in the dark
We used to be not apart
But we fell away
You were the one that got away
I come to think of this everyday
I hate when it be this way
Girl can’t you see the way
There’s a Path back to me
Back to us
Back to when we once was
I hunt the feeling of your memory everyday just to see you again momentarily
Aug 2019 · 229
Why
Justice Aug 2019
Why
Why
That is my, question
Didnt pay attention, even when I needed the lesson
The mistakes I've made
I thought I was on top but it's only my self I've played
It's almost like I'm afraid
what I can become
I run from everyone
Who want to wait to find out
When you can die now
Aug 2019 · 375
Reflection
Justice Aug 2019
Mirrors reflect what
We are feeling most
When I look into one
I just feel broke
Is this the path
I've really chose to
go
Who am I to you,
Will I really ever
know
What do you think?
Jul 2019 · 196
Self loathing
Justice Jul 2019
I was always one to hide behind curtains
One afraid of the uncertains
In my own home I'm not comfortable, I have no where to go though
Anxious when buying clothes
oh how am I gonna look in those
Even walking to school
****, talking to me
all you would've seen was a fool
A faker tryna be cool
On the outside I played it pretty cool
But on the in you could have never guessed how much trouble I was really In
Well where do I begin
How do I tell you that I hate my self
How do I explain to you that I was the item collecting dust on the shelf
Seen by no one not even even the owner himself
Invisible all together miserable
Playing tricks on my self in my own mind on my own time
Would always think that I was getting my **** together
But was always blind sided by bad weather or my own mind
How does that rhyme
But I guess I didn't know that I was lying to myself and everyone else  hard procrastinator self destructive manipulator
I don't know why I hate my self I can't seem to figure it out
I want to be better
I want to be free
Over all I just want to be me
But I don't even who that is no more I'm so lost off the path I don't think i can get back
I should try,
To not, I can't think of a reason why
But instead I'm covered by the same gloom that seems to loom over us all making us all just want to fall and not get up
But please just listen to me if you've ever felt like this put your head up
1st draft, what do ya think?

— The End —