She downplays my emotions
I may be sad,
But she's depressed.
I may be stressed,
But she's been running around all day.
I had a long day,
But hers was even longer.

I am unhappy,
But my emotions aren't as important
As hers.

She said,
I want to die
Just let me die.
And I felt her words
Throughout the entirety of my soul
Because I knew
I knew.

We sat there stroking her back
He and I.
As she kept saying
I want to die
I looked up at him
And I saw it in his eyes
And he saw it in mine
Because he knew.
He knew.

Three broken people
Sitting at a party together.
Her sober thoughts coming out
As drunk words.
I heard it in her voice,
He saw it in my eyes,
I saw it in his eyes,
And for one second,
None of us were alone
Together we shared the pain.
Because we knew.
We knew.

The sky was pink cotton candy.
So was his voice.
Pure sugar swirled around itself in wispy strands.
Soft landings for hard truths.
Broken people refuse to be loved.

“I have to go,” he said.
The cotton candy brewed into cumulonimbus beneath his eyes.
It’s not you it’s me.
You’re perfect. I’m an idiot. I’m sorry.
I don’t know what I’m looking for, but I need to find it.
Smooth hesitation.
Rain drops.
Petrichor filled the blue Honda.

She could picture a small cottage,
Somewhere in a forsaken corner in the wilderness of Norway:
Smoke billowed from the chimney.
A lone resident stood near the warm glow of a fire.
The lone man shivered.

“There’s nothing I can do to change your mind.”
Lightning cracked / Splitting heart.
His eyes smoldered with adoration.
He smiled apologetically.
Cotton candy melts when exposed to rain and tears:
Sticky confusion.
“You won’t find warmth if you’re running from the sun.”
Silent plea: please come back if you can.

The man in the cabin shifted suddenly and looked out the window.
Drifting snowflakes – building tufts of cotton candy.
If I can wafted out of the chimney,
Scented with cedar and rain clouds –
Singed with uncertainty.
Tainted cotton candy cannot be restored.

Perth,
where Heath Ledger came from,
was where she was from
and she was explaining to me
what Marmite was
and the other guy in the room
just kept playing his guitar
and singing
louder and louder
for an audience of
white bricks
that made up the walls
because jealously makes
you see eyes in
everything
and you don't know
if the performance will
be your last

What's your darkest demon
or deepest secret?
Who would forgive you?
Who would love you nonetheless?
Try finding a friend who you can ignore
for days, months on end
that will pick right back up with you
If you can't think of one I can tell you one
One who loves
One who forgives
You can meet Him anytime
Just bow your head
and hit your knees
He'll meet you right there