"At least I have a girlfriend...."
everyone laughs

Yeah I may be going solo
Here's something you should know, though
I had a girlfriend once too
But now I am on my own

"I bet you think you're so hard
Did she get rid of you?
Did you dump her?
Was it because you're a ******
And have nothing better to do?"

everyone laughs again

Nah, I am not *******
I just extinguished the fire I started
Because the stress was killing me
I may be cold sometimes,
But I ain't no beast

I've got a heart too, I guess
Though I wouldn't mind if you were laid to rest
Because if these insults are some form of test
The only thing you're wasting is your breath

"Nah, I'm just showing how much better I am
And how having a girlfriend makes me a man"

Last time I checked, to be a man,
You didn't need
A girl to beat
Do you understand?

"Aw, ******* ****
You're just being a *****
Why don't you just bend over
And go **** on someone's' ****"

A few people shake their heads

I just said I had a girlfriend
What, because I'm single means I'm suddenly gay?
Tell you what mate, I still like girls
Oh, and by the way...

If you don't beat your girlfriend
Why is her face all cuts and bruises?
Did you do it because you're a "man?"
I really hate you losers

Hit a girl for no reason
"Awww it's coz I'm tough"
impersonates drunk, gets a few laughs
It's pronounced "girl" not "punching bag"
Do you want to know what's rough?

"No, what's rough"
Drunken man takes a swing, misses

"My fist"