I'm aware.
Just sitting here.
Aware of the sounds of the sweet music, like a nectar in my ear, awakening every cell in my brain.
I'm aware of the soft blanket touching my bed.

Oh how long have I been asleep for, before awakening into this life.
For I have been lost for so long.
It's been a dream state. I've been a dream state for so long. But I don't want to anymore.

I want to awaken and smell the flowers. To feel the gentle touch of this life. Of the reality that I am born into to understand the depth of the life I have been so gracefully granted. To hear the children laugh and to see the kittens play.

For I have been in such a long slumber,  the time before I did not understand, I did not see, just floating in a dreamworld so preoccupied and unaware.

But now... Now I am aware, Now I am alive more so than I was before. I live and breathe with ever ounce of my being. No more doubt no more resistance or hesitance, no, now I breathe. I breathe the air that I have been given. I breathe.

I see a darkness in you.
The same darkness I see in me.
I also see a ray of light,
Reflecting, shining, a brilliance not many people have.
I'm messed up, my head down the gutter.
And I run. I run from the hollowness and I run from the dark.
And I'll keep running until I'm shown the light shines from me.
You saw the light,
The light I could not see.
You showed me that I too have a light,
A light that refracts like a diamonds, shining colours and splitting, allowing others to see and feel the warmth.

Though I still see the darkness, though it only mimics what once was.
you have shown me a light that I can make shine bright.
You helped show me thatI am more than the hole which tears my heart apart.
You helped show me that I too can be brilliant and I too can shine like a bursting star.
I could destroy galaxies and planets and be something so destructive.
But instead, you turned me int a light that shines so bright I keep other planets alive.

You'll never see or understand how much you've done for me.
How much you've shared or how your kindness has brought meinto the light.

I was a destroyer
I thought I was the darkness
But you've shown me that I am better.
Now I am the light.
Now I can be brilliant.
I know what you've given me.
And I am so eternally grateful.

But the darkess still seeps in. It still stays.
It creeps in at night when I'm feeling low.
Sometimes i miss the dark because it was so easy.
But I hold onto the light because the light shines through the darkness.

Waiting
My head is swarming with thoughts of life,
A deepening Sadness, sharp like a blunt knife.
The realisation hits strong and hard,
Forcing it’s way through like a Diamond shard.

No-one Cares, Loves or Knows
It’s so Obvious They’re oblivious and it shows,
You have no Scars or Blood on your skin,
Though you’ve stopped eating, your bones growing Thin.

No-one Dares to notice, the fake behind your smile.
hold it there, you can fake it for a while.
When you think for a second you’ve finally been Caught.
Don’t even worry, it hasn’t Even been thought.

Everyone is too Busy to notice You.
as You’re falling in, Drowning in deep dark Blue.
You struggle, and Fall into the hole,
Panicking, Screaming, scared. You lost your Soul.

You can’t do anything but smile and grin
This horrifying dreamland that’s roped you in.
The Laughing and Cackling lays you No Harm,
Inside you’re Withering, with your exterior calm.

The monsters have taken over your body and Mind
but the Worst part of this, I think you will find.
Is No-One cares, noticed or flinched.
When you’re still waiting as your humanities been pinched.