Am I recovering or just distracted?

You don’t know what’s next, and that’s alright
You never really understood the idea of success
It is, in its nature, a self-defined word

You always thought you had to prove your worth
Why?
You felt the need to change something, and become noticed.
You wanted to be known.

I can only offer what I know so far.
You have to learn to validate yourself
Otherwise you will live your whole life trying to please other people.

I know that twisted wrist behind your back, I know that fake plastered smile,
I know the gritted teeth and the tired eyes.

Walk away.

"If you're a guy, why do you carry around a purse?"

I stare at her, hard.
My gender therapist, questioning me?

To carry my ****. Why else?
Don't impose these stereotypes on me.


Also,
my jeans don't have pockets.

The sun still rises
The earth stills turns
Life still goes on,
but you’re not here.

I wish I took up your offer to go golfing, just once.

You would’ve let me win anyways.
You always did.

Rest well.

It rains a little
It rains a little
It rains a little
Rain song
It rains a little

Cleanse the heart.
Cleanses the skin, cleanses and relieves pain.
"Very good. Too bad."

Sing a clear song
Hurt the lungs
If you want to change your name, humble yourself and know that you will not be insulted.
"Nobody believes you. You're lying."

Become a holy soul.
The dragon flew through the air.
By strong winds and terrible falls.
"What you see next is good.”

I can't sing on my own.
His voice turned green.
Heavy rains filled my heart
The sun is on
Honey, they took me to a beautiful place.

I hate being right about things
that I don’t want to be right about

Shame on me.
Guess I should’ve known better than to hope.

I’ve spent 6 years waiting,
lost and confused,
stumbling my way through the dark.
Slipping rocks into my pockets to weigh myself down.

Thought about giving up reaching the surface too many times to count.

I’ve finally been handed a flashlight.
I’m going to find my way out of here.

And of course, I might get lost on the way.
The flashlight might burn out.
But I’m not going to back down anymore.

It’s time to recover.