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Sep 10 · 42
Beyond
Anza Sep 10
When I see you smile I ask myself what am I gonna do now
I never told a lie but you still believe rumors that flies
I watched our love fall apart and I admit inside me I lost a part
I stood up all night trying to find a way to prevent something I'll never control
Even if I open up it wouldn't help much were just young and dumb
It's better to walk away but you chose to leave
I've been scared of telling you your mistakes and I praised you and that
How can love be materialistic or I wasn't enough
I only learnt now that the best I gave you to you  was just just
I gave you something you can't hold but memories are tattooed to your heart
You looked at me different but mentally I was nourishing us
A smile is not happiness so you shouldn't have promised me your soul now you walked away with mine
I thought you'd be better, you just needed time but it's out of my control I'll never be enough.
Love
Sep 10 · 46
Your wounds not mine
Anza Sep 10
Take my heart mistreat it like it's the one that brought you stress
Here's my life make me suffer for trying to be the best you ever had
Here's my all, feed me lies like you don't know my intentions
Here's my hope make it dissappear like fire flies when the sun sets
Mock my love, it's probably the only joke I got left
Take my heart, take my heart, make it hurt like it stabbed you on your back
Take my arms they're the only materialistic things I can give
Call me names like I just wanted you on my bed not for forever
Watch me fall apart, break down with the remedy in your hands
Make me suffer like your ex did
Show me you don't trust me and let go of all we got
Show Me your worst, I'm ready to take all the beating till you're empty
Treat me bad, show me all the pain that he caused you
Hurt
Mar 27 · 36
Everything about her
Anza Mar 27
She loves the sound of the morning birds when the sun is setting
When she blink the world experience day and night in seconds
Her voice makes me feel like she hang around a lot with angels
She slept on my chest I felt like I woke up next to a different person, I still don't believe if her beauty is real
When she kiss my neck she slowly takes away my breath
If I'm not careful she can **** me with her perfection
It's not that she doesn't talk too much, she just doesn't like attention
I remember the first time I saw her, I still can't believe I held her arm
Like a thief in the night, I'll always sneak into her heart
She's so majestic she makes hearts melt down, it took me minutes before I could have the strength to pull my jaw up
I felt it when I was laying on her chest that the storm is over now
I know everything about her she doesn't really like so sleep under a dimmed light
Love
Mar 27 · 28
What did I do to you?
Anza Mar 27
You left me frustrated and you go around town and tell everybody I'm normal
You make me a fool but I always fall for you anyway, I feel like your disposal
You said I'm useless, I heard you in person that's all your words in total
I took care of us when life was moving slowly now that now when I'm at my low you start taking walks
I did you wrong by trusting you but letting my guard down was worst
I'm proud of what you've accomplished but if it wasn't for me you'd still be nothing
I'd rather be a killer than being a statistic cause not everyone is loyal
I can't say I gave you a life cz that would be disrespectful to your mother's womb but I taught you life's circles
I won't tell what you gave in return but you still act like a spoiled person
Heartbreak
Mar 26 · 54
My side
Anza Mar 26
We had a notion to stay happy for years
I wasn't honest but losing someone like you was all I feared
I thought you'd take advantage of my love if I showed you that I really care
Being with you was better but walking alone welcomes gallons of tears
You were by my side a second ago now you're not here
I'm slowly breaking down and what I need is clear
I broke all my promises I hope it didn't touch your heart my dear
Our trust was broken like a misplaced chandelier
Our loyalty faded like it was something to spare
But the truth is, the real us was all I feared :
The pain in your voice is something more
Mar 26 · 21
And i
Anza Mar 26
I'm tired of feeling sorry for myself my love
I've been up and down in my feelings and i
And I've been having sleepless nights because of you my love
You always walk away tell me what I did wrong this time
My heart is tired I think it's your turn to fight for us
I don't mind being hurt for the reason of love, you and i
You've been distant, tell me who am I supposed to hold these nights
I only ask myself what's happening to us, once I stop fighting for us there's no more us
My fuel has depleted but you're to lazy to lend a hand
Or am I the one who loves you and you don't? My love?
And i
Heart
Mar 26 · 163
Is this me?
Anza Mar 26
I got issues I got to see a seer
They said I used to be polite, now I ain't sincere
These days the person I talk to is the mirror
I act brave in your eyes but deep down I got fears
My emotions are out of order I'm sorry If I've hurt you my dear
Happiness come and goes like seasons, it's like the end is near
I'm sorry I used your smile to cancel all my fears
I do get tired of living on my knees when I'm a non believer
Love
Mar 26 · 35
Before you go
Anza Mar 26
I was born imperfect like every human
I do make mistakes that's why we're breathing
I said some words to make myself feel better, I didn't know I was hurting you in the sentence
I'm sorry I compared you with my ex's, nobody ever made my blood rush like you do
'I love you' is popular but I've been trying to find words with greater meaning, so you can see how I'm feeling
I admit that I'm jealous, I don't want you to make another fool feel the way you make me feel
I'd lose my mind if you choose to walk away from me

I'm insecure like most lover's but I'm sorry I couldn't hide it
I told a lie to make you happy but it's like I'll pay the price
I'm more in love with you and I'll always fight you if I don't see it in your eyes
Once you compare my mistakes with my intentions honey you'll find love confusing
Loyalty is everything cause love can get you killed
Growing old in your arms sounds like a perfect options, unless you found another options
Pain is not good for anyone's health, once you get hurt, you'll feel like love is a curse
I've been broken for so long, I'm sorry I've been hurting you with. You baggage
Before you go, I want you to know my love for you is still visible like the first day we met
Love
Mar 26 · 46
There (questions)
Anza Mar 26
I can tell you how I feel but we've been there before
You said you got my back but you watched me fall
You said you're my voice but you don't really talk
Are we living a lie? Or your heart is not involved at all?
Am I in your heart or I'm someone you just like to call?
I taught for your heart, are you sure you're giving me your all?
Everytime we kiss it's like you're looking for something more!

Lies and betrayal, we've been there before
You act like you don't need me, who am I supposed to call?
I can see it in your eyes the spark is gone!
But I can't question your love although it's looks like it's taking a walk
I used to fall in love with everyday now you've built a wall
Honey I'm not here to fight, can we at least talk?
Is it just me or what we used to have is gone?
All I know is that if I fall out of love I'm lost
Now I can feel it in my heart the lime is drawn
But I'll keep looking for your love from dusk till dawn
Anxiety
Sep 2019 · 46
SUNDAY
Anza Sep 2019
It's Sunday in South Africa
It's a little rainy so don't mind if I studdle
I wake up everyday with thoughts of struggle
I wanna be somebody but my inner strength start to mumble
But I got to look for happiness even though where I live it's expensive
The intesnsity of where I live almost mde me give up on poetry
I miss wearing my blessings like a roserry
It's Sunday let me go to church
May 2019 · 93
GONE
Anza May 2019
I'm just sitting all alone thinking what I did wrong
I just stared at the winter window cz in the mist is where I can draw your face
I'm a man please tell me something I don't know
You're on the old town road heading home ,you left with my heart when you closed that door
Tell me who I'm supposed to talk to when I'm all alone,who am I supposed to go to when you're not at home
I'm not used to the silence,can we argue about something useless just like what we used to
You're a motivation to my song , you're my notes when I'm down
Tell me who am I supposed to run to when you're gone

You were the perfect weapon to **** my sadness everytime
I did you wrong ,you did me wrong that's how we learn
Relationships needs commitment and we were too busy having fun we didn't care about that
You didn't pick up my phone so I had to try your mother's phone,**** your voice heals every pain
Just 22 hours ago I was holding you close,now how am I supposed to face this world on my own
It's like I've been in love with you before we met and true feelings appeared when I saw you smiling
I don't know what I did wrong but our communication was unbreakable even when I was not close

Baby it's cold,what happened to turning my winters into summer
Remember the day we started dating, I'm still waiting for you to keep that promise and come back home
I don't need another girl, there's only one girl that I want
We had our vows ,we majestically rejoiced when it was better and rich ,now you left ,what went wrong what's worse
I still miss your smile, it's only been hours ,for another days,weeks, month's, years,how do you think I'll cope?
I couldn't afford much materialistic wants of yours but you know I can afford your smile
Who am I supposed to love when you're gone?
Recovery-thougjts
Dec 2018 · 65
Fall
Anza Dec 2018
broke ? For you I wasn't woke?
I'm losing myself over you ,you were too perfect that I didn't put any soul above you boo
I can taste all the hate on your tongue
And I felt numb
You focus on all of my wrongs
You broke my heart but it's life ,I hope you're happy with him
I'm done burning my lungs
Love
Dec 2018 · 162
Fall
Anza Dec 2018
Fall in love or fall out of love
Fall for everyone of fall for one

We all got a choice
Dec 2018 · 75
Old love
Anza Dec 2018
Let's take it back ,love letters under the rock
Darling you make me feel like I'm seven years old
In people's mouths our story will be told
Play me that guitar filled with concrete stoves
Take me back where we weared matching pants
Primary kids with no regrets

You couldn't tell me you love me so you wrote it on a paper
I studdled when I look in your eyes ,you said you love me too before I could say I love you
You saw that I need you before I could spit the right words
Give me back the good old love
Where we were young ,no heart breaks just the seven years old love

You broke my heart you never apologized like when you broke my pencil when we were young
I miss you it reminds me when we were young ,we'd go home just to brush out teeth so we'd kiss at five at dark
Sneak at the back of your house ,sitting in the dark in the dog's house ,with our parents not knowing where we are

Sweet old dreams thinking of marriage when we were nine
I saw you everyday at school show you off to my friends, I believed you were mine
When I was interested in another girl ,you made me believe we were wasting time
I did some wrongs but you still gave me time
There was nothing pretty like watching you smile
I was proud of being a hero when you were scared of a mouse
I miss the good old love
Love
Dec 2018 · 181
I'm leaving
Anza Dec 2018
I tried using  words but you're too busy to listen
I used to make you laugh now I'm not the reason
It's great when you're around but now your love for me is missing
My heart is over flooding but I'll survive
I admit i miss being in your arms but I'm much better alive
Isn't it love? When I sat like a fool a believed you even when I knew you were telling a lie
You said you love me but you told your friends I'm following you around
You said you need me when were around people you make me a clown

Sometimes we get heartbroken for wrong reasons
Sometimes we lose ourselves for selfish reasons
I fell in love in a painful season
Love
Dec 2018 · 68
Open up
Anza Dec 2018
My heart is always somewhere ,thinking about you ,drinking or crushing ****
Your love was planted in my heart and  grew from a healthy seed ,I can't even cut it
It's almost sounding like a suaside note
Apparently my soul is moving out of my body it alredy started packing
Between us what was missing?
It got me thinking that being perfect needs a practice too but nobody ever get that skill

I always claimed to be OK when you're away ,but a few minutes without you my life felt like *******
I spent time chasing you n you took time rejecting me
What's the meaning of love?or I just pushed you till you had enough?

Deeply it's bruising me ,it got me thinking, weren't we perfect for each other? Or we can't help hurting each other
I remember the day you introduced me to your brother and honestly to me you almost Like a mother
The sounds when a heart breaks ,I almost felt like I got a melting face
I break down almost everyday ,it feels like I got a price to pay
In the theatre you removed my play


What drives pain away ?
The way I feel is no longer your burden, all alone I'll be walking
Winds will blind my eyes ,your words always  breaks my heart
Playing your sweet games and I always fall when you're lonely
It makes my heart ache
I wish you all the best
It's crazy how I sing alone ,always your name in every bar
I'm done playing pretending this is the real me
Heartbreak
Dec 2018 · 93
I'm sorry
Anza Dec 2018
I wasn't leaving ,it was temporary Darling
We were young and free ,I didn't know you were broken I didn't know you were suffering
I'm sorry I couldn't call you, I'm sorry I said I'll call later but didn't get back to you
I didn't know distance would leave scars that were beyond repair ,I'm sorry you feel replaced

I'm sorry I wasn't there when it was zero foreinheight
I walked for weeks without texting you back
I'm sorry that I was blind ,leaving you for this long
We were young ,we were free ,I'm sorry I left you in the cold for all this time
I'm sorry you felt left behind, I'm sorry I didn't have time just to listen to your voice, your heart was never meant for this

I'm sorry I left you in the dark ,I'm sorry my promises weren't kept until dawn
It was temporary Darling now your heart can't love ,you felt like you were living a lie
I'm not perfect and what I did wasn't genuine
Now you no longer feel at home when you're in my arms
Your heart felt
I'm sorry I never show how I need you all the time

I'm not good when it comes to apologies ,the only person who was wrong was me  
It feels hopeless when you're near me ,the wrong impressions I gave you broke your heart
I'm just glad you're alive
Can we hold each other for a night?
Can I make up all the things I messed up overnight?
Can you tell me how to treat you right ,baby I'm not here to fight
I'm sorry ,
Love
Oct 2018 · 74
Goodbye
Anza Oct 2018
It's like I drank your poison for the seventh day ,it's like you Already know the day I'll die you probably saved the date

It was you and I forever that's how it was supposed to be ,it didn't feel like a relationship it felt like you molested me

I'm destined to be alone I think ,I gave you love and in return you cheated ,I went on my knees even went to church for you to listen to me

I drank that church wine but it doesn't work for me you took all of me and left me with nothing but just an empty heart beating

When I rise you always made me fall  ,you bought the negative energy to wash away all the love I got for you but it never stopped me cz I though I was the one for you

I'd rather leave than keep on fighting, this is my goodbye I'm done trying,it's like I'm destined to be alone in this life

Your kiss felt like a spell because I was in love with you I had to take that risk ,you kissed me with your eyes open and I felt a gun pointing at my head ,when I opened my eyes you missed

You're the true meaning of attraction but you try to get rid of those who are looking for love and keep those who wanna penetrate your thies ,what you don't know is there's more in life

I'd rather leave than keep on fighting, this is my goodbye I'm done trying,it's like I'm destined to be alone in this life

I LEFT THE MASSAGE AFTER THE TONE
Heartbreak
Oct 2018 · 264
Love is....
Anza Oct 2018
Staying up all night just to chat or hearing someone's voice for hours

Cuddling all night when you're mad at each other ,caring for someone who did you wrong

Love is arguing all day and making love all night ,being impatient for something that you're sure you gonna have

Sharing dreams  ,respect and honesty ,showing what love means

Apologies after every mistakes ,accepting every flaw ,nobody is perfect, fill life with smiles not regrets

Love is........


Learning from mistakes so u can do better..

Love is changing your  worst into your worth

Love makes the world feels so good ,it's written in the moonlight

Chasing after rainbow an get lost in the middle of nowhere that's where love exist

Love makes today today
Love
Oct 2018 · 183
Free
Anza Oct 2018
Girl why are you disturbing my sleep ,why are you still calling my phone when you're the one who made it clear that you don't need me

Humiliated me in front of your friends and tell them I'm invisible to you ,now you're telling me you need my time ,honey with my Heartbreakers I don't dine ,I can't give you more time to ruin my life

I gave you all I had ,I'm lonely now in my bed ,even though with rumours I was fed ,I didn't believe them at all but you proved me wrong baby you're a selfish one

Now you're saying you need me in your life ,baby I was Never perfect for you I'll let this chance pass ,I don't want you to mess up my heart ,right now I got to recover from all those pains

Stop calling me at night ,for you I'm not the perfect guy ,you didn't respect me at all ,now you say you want my all ,girl you gotta stop that joke

Girl I won't lie for you I still fall but baby I'm better off alone ,in time I'll learn to move on

Girl don't give me that Innocent face ,you got beauty but no brains ,you're rich and I don't have a thing  so it's better if you stay in your lane
Moving on
Aug 2018 · 131
Give me a chance
Anza Aug 2018
I look at your bruises and wish if u could was them away ,he's always beating you but you're telling me you stills feel safe in his arms

Whenever you do his laundry, you're always fighting his clothes, if I could was your scars and let me drive in safely in your heart I swear I'll be your ride for lie

You're always wearing make up to cover those blue eyes he gave you but I know what you're hiding behind that make up is pain and regrets ,I know what you're hiding in that dress are scars and  bruises

Girl I can be better ,treat you better and I can respect you and show you what  you're worth, you're better than diamonds ,you shine brighter than they do, so don't let him scratch you

Every night you won't be shouting and crying for help but a smile will be the best make up you'll be wearing because you deserve that
Heart
Anza Aug 2018
I sat there in the dark just waiting for your call to light up my face

Your love smashed my bones I don't Have more strength to fight all your accusations

I sing alone and cry just hoping you'll see my tears and take it easy on my heart

I slept shaking like I spent 7 nights in the cold ,I slept with a heavy heart ,with foolish thoughts on my mind when I was hoping to die

I slept by the river waiting for your love to pass by ,I suffered from thousand bites when you were there by my side just watching

When I turn around you stabbed me with a knife and still ask if I'm ok ,when you saw me crying you told people that's how we play

I thought I had it all but all you served me was leftovers
Feeling down n heart broken
Aug 2018 · 145
A man's love
Anza Aug 2018
you switched off the light and left me in the dark and came back at 4am in the morning but still I kept quiet and acted like I didn't see a thing when I Wake up

I overhead you on the phone telling my child to call another man "daddy" on the phone and I still held her like she's my own

When we were arguing, you said I'm just a stupid man who don't know anything and I smiled and internally I said "know everything" but out loud I just said it's OK I'm stupid

I saw you entering my friends house and you came back with his car and said it's your friends car, I didn't know what to say because it's the day I wanted to introduce you to him

You took it too far when you brought another guy over and you claimed he's your cousin, and i caught you in bed with him but you didn't even let me touch you every night but still I didn't think of cheating

When you looked in my eyes and apologized, I could see you in the next 3 minutes packing, and I was tired of raising another man's child

I'll find someone better who'll find me enough and satisfying in their lives and who'll avoid to live lie because their legs won't always be open to any guy like a magazine

Don't forget to take your little kid ,I think its high time I make my own family not feeding another man's family

I overhead you in the kitchen telling him that you miss him and that I'm nothing in your life ....that broke me

Goodbye
A man is heart broken by standing all his partners hurtful actions
Aug 2018 · 465
I hate love songs
Anza Aug 2018
I hate love songs because they always remind me all my mistakes and all the guilt I hold inside

I feel like my love for a person ain't enough everytime I press play and they remind me how useless I am

They bring out the weakness in me and turn gold into coal and leave a hole in my heart a thousand feet deep

I hate love songs because they remind me of broken promises that I failed to keep and all the instructions of falling in love I failed to read

I hate the lyrics that always prove me wrong on thinking I'm loving right and to show that there ain't any reason to fight

I hate how love songs are sang because that's how I spend all my sleepless night alone and just holding my pillow tight

I hate love songs because they make me realise thousand things when I'm thinking I got everything under control

I hate love songs
Hate
Anza Aug 2018
When my heart starts to sound like broken strings and my blood lose its dancing rhythm and my eyes start to look at each other funny

When the sound of your broken  promises coming like a nightmare and when i lost focus and didn't know  which way to go

When your broken strings are discovered, when your I love you starts to sound like I hate you and revealing the fake you

When you abandon your broken guitar strings and try to play a violin and you find that you're not good at it so as your stupid games and lovers  start to reject you and the only thing to blame is your foolish heart full of shame

When my heart start to sound like broken  strings and the only thing to focus on is healing my wounds, when your music is nolonger appreciated

When honesty comes like a whisper and the truth over flood all your lies and you remain tied helplessly, when the only thing you can play is yourself

When true love runs out
About a broken hearted man expressing his feelings
Aug 2018 · 121
Would you take me back
Anza Aug 2018
If I tell you all my flaws warent my choices but situation that didn't even care about my own

If I admit that i was wrong in every argument would you believe me

If I tell you that I was too proud to apologize after every fight because I was taking advantage of your love ,would you take me back?

If I show you that I though all my wrongs were right and how I thought all my lies were right would you take me back?

If I tell you that in your arms I felt more alive and I appreciate every moment and just acted like it wasn't enough and admit my wrongs, would you take me back?

Would you take me back to mend your broken heart and take your mind to Paradise to recover everything that I left wounded ,would you take me back?

If I get down on my knees and promise you my life not the earth because the last time I promised you the earth it didn't work out would, you take me back?

If I drop a tear in front of your eyes and admit that I was a lie and promise you honesty for the rest of your life ,would you take me back?

If I hold you tight and promise not to let you down and share your tears when you're down and never let your knees touch the ground, would you take me back?

If I promise to always be around and never leave you for someone and stay with you in the dark until the light arrives ,would you take me back?

But two questions in my heart, did you regret being in love with me?,and would you take me back?
Regrets

— The End —