when you start
feeling as if
just being you
    is not enough ,..

when you see
the sunlight slipping away
sliding into the ocean
and the outbound tide
    is pulling strong ,..

   gravity throbs downward ―
you see it's weight groan
pacing in lonely eyes,

you feel it's burden
bear down on
a wayfaring stranger
   wandering away alone ,..
wondering what went wrong

stalled by a riverside
frozen in time ;
walking on slippery rocks
and fallen stars,
searching for peace
along the meandering shoreline

the waterfall surrenders
a river's silent lament ;
the storm gales' surge stirs
the urge for moving on

a heart broken knows
how fickle tides change
which way the wind blows ,..

which way the rain
     comes falling down ―

watershed moments
undulating
serpentine rivers,

unbridled terrain waters
veritably cascading  beyond
blurred latitudes,
uninhibitedly drifting
     in shapeless symmetry ―

a deep ocean rises
with the calling tide's
murmur,

  the shorebirds linger ;
hole up with the peace
of the unsullied sands
at the sea stained
      tide-mark ―

barnacles cling
to the pulse
of the tidal sway
where starfish hold on to
   slippery rocks ,..

being enough
to while away
just a little bit longer ―

to simply let it all be
and wholly wash out
in the water
waiting for the tide change,

to swallow whole
the rivers stagnant flow,
immersing
    the stars in swirling silence ―

in the unrestrained
    rhythm and the sea ...

I have built you

With every word that has dripped dry off my cracked lips
You have come to
In the fabrics of my exhaled breathes
Becoming condensation on my snow globe dreams
Begging to seep into the soil of these neurotic tissues

My mind has grown monuments of you
Built with products of the moments
Glorified bombshells
Floating to our Earthbound desires

I have built you
Into this moment
Presently

This building we have created
We call home
I find myself here
Cracked skin
Broken shoulders
Exhausted self
Happy
To be

The broken hieroglyphic notions that I wrote on paper have brought me here
Begging
To empty this empty shell of a carcass of all the emotions I am convinced I feel fully
You will not be the one to tell me otherwise

Elation
Will forever been a childhood dream
Manifested in Christmas songs, long nails and ignoring the too many times you told me you loved me
That ended after 22 short years
That was five years ago
I am still on a search party

Doubt
Is left in the hands of god and tomorrow

Wonder
I still wonder why
Forever we will not seen eye to eye
Because the wonder I experience
Will always be a glass half full

Depression
There was never a question in your ability to consume
You have adapted to the cells of existance
Breathing on my smile
Wondering how I could still be happy

Longing
.............................

Perserverance
With your absence
I still show up
For some days I wake wishing the latter
For you
Never gave up

Family
Has become lily pads in a dried lake bed
Failing to fulfil its purpose
Needing guidance
Depserately
Wishing that you
Would come back home

Salt makes soup delicious
just like
Love makes our life gorgeous.