I think we forget
to take pleasure in the small things

If we listened to rain
as if it were a symphony of angels
Maybe we wouldn't mind so much
if our plans got rained out

If we watched each sunset
as if we might never see another again
Maybe we would notice
how beautiful it really is

If we took in every compliment
without hesitation
Maybe we would realize
that we really are beautiful

But we tend to shrug these off
instead of really enjoying them

Why do we feel things we didn't ask for?
Why do we get things we don't want?
Why do we find things we try to avoid?
Why do we hold on to things we should let go?
Why do we love the things that hurt us most?

Why is it so hard to walk away?
Why is is so hard to see reality?
Why is it so hard to let go?
Why is it so hard to find the right path?

I didn't ask for this,
I didn't ask to feel this way.
You said "it would've been fine,"
"It wouldn't change anything."

You left me thinking,
Wondering if I have more feelings,
It's eating me up inside.
I don't want to tell you,
For I fear for whats on the inside.

it was one of those crazy hot days in the dead of summer.
i remember because of the sweat that poured down my skin
and the way my eyes squinted as the bright sun shone.
i massaged my neck nervously, my mouth twisted into a grimace.
ya see, i’ve always been weak, especially when it comes to you.
so what i was readying myself to do, i knew, would be too much.
but i had to let you go as the rays of sunlight baked my skin and
my head began to ache from how hard i was squinting, grimacing.
i said goodbye, as my heart raced, either from the heat or the pain.

how easy was it
to walk away?
did you walk out
with your heavy heart
weighing you down
or did you run out
skipping?
why did you
have to go?
why did you think
the only option left
was to simply
pack you bags
and leave?
it hurts.
it hurts a lot
knowing
that you gave up on me.
gave up on us.
i don't think
i have cried
so many tears
in my sixteen years
of existence.
but if you came back
i would welcome you in
with open arms.
we can start new.
i can refill your heart
with the love
you lost when you
walked out.
but answer me
one thing:
how easy was it
to walk away
mom?