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858 · Aug 2013
Itch [Ich brenne]
Ich brenne auf dich zu ficken;
       Tja, hätte Lust auf dich zu steigen,
ich brenne darauf dein nackter Korper gegen meinen:
           Ich brenne noch mit dir zu schlafen.

You are my itch,
I am bewitched.

Wenn ich so ehrlich sein könnte:
hab ich große Lust
dich die ganze Nacht zu ficken.

Ich will dass du schreist;
ich will dass du kommst,
meinetwegen.
Poetry at it's finest.
858 · Jan 2013
Unabashed Arrogance
Have you ever pondered the possibility
that your reactions and attitudes
censor the possibilities that are open to you?
A recurring theme in my life.
857 · Jul 2013
Redependance Day
Did we not found this Country
to escape subversive elitism and unjust law?

What the **** happened?
854 · Mar 2014
Festivities!
Wearing just
a Toga fashioned from my black satin sheet
and a Tophat
sipping Sirrah out of a champagne flute;

It's been a crazy night.
Played a show after our lead guitarist got arrested
in a situation that reeks of entrapment,
and then, at midnight, it became my roommate's 21st birthday and she requested that people wear togas, so as soon as I got home, I put on this black satin sheet. A friend then opted to get in on the Toga action. So, we looked up various styles of impromptu-togas, and then we decided that wine was in order for this toga-based shenanigan. The other Toga-clad gentlemen then suggested that we drink it out of champagne flutes. Now, here we are: a Toga and a Tophat, sippin' great red wine out of champagne flutes.
851 · Jan 2014
-ism [Harmony]
The nature in which
you respect and respond to an Idea,
whether or not you agree with it,
is wholly within your realm of responsibility
as a sentient, conscious Being;
but it is the very fact
that the Idea exists at all
that holds significance.
A
smidgeon
of overindulgence
is sometimes necessary
to gain appreciation for
your own limitations
as well as the way
everything else
otherwise
always
is.
850 · Oct 2013
Mutual Non-obligation
You don't owe the World anything but Respect
and don't let anyone mislead you into thinking otherwise;
and likewise the World doesn't owe you anything,
so stop lying to yourself and inflating your false sense of entitlement
and come on out of your ivory tower of ire and glass.
850 · Sep 2016
Kindness ain't Agreement
Folks
needn't agree
to be kind
to one another

In fact,
kindness
due to mere agreement
is oft fickle and hollow-
a vile form
of bribery
850 · Mar 2013
Balance
It is one thing
to teach by example,
but it is entirely different
to take over and become
the self-proclaimed know-it-all
Head-*******-In-Charge
disallowing learning on the parts of your peers.

These two are a stone's toss apart.
848 · Feb 2014
Total War
The Police in Ukraine seem guilty of waging Total War.
Is this the new face of Democracy?
We each get a say in which goes bullet in our head?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmDqqZZceX0 <- Graphic, but Film doesn't Lie
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iICzRf8m21w
848 · May 2013
Adjectify
It is my duty as a Scholar of Language
to adjectify things.

Paradoxically,
true adjectification
is impossible.

Such is Life.
Obscure words!
Adjectify:
lit.: To make a Noun into an Adjective
fig.: To describe a phenomenon with words

I thought I made them up, (how hubristic!)
but I found out they're just rare.
Yay for doing research!
847 · Jan 2014
Haiku on Self-Limitation
One's greatest limits
seem too often to be those
brooding in One's mind
847 · Jul 2014
Advice
The most earnest of advice,
no matter how well intentioned,
all too oft does more harm than good.

One cannot teach by example
when everyone else is too self-absorbed
to learn by example.
847 · Dec 2012
Words are just that.
Why do we feel the need to talk all the time?
Just because we have hammers doesn't mean we must always use them.
Just because we have cars doesn't mean we can't walk.
Just because we have computers doesn't mean we can't practice calligraphy.
Just because we have paint doesn't mean that we must fill in all the white space.

We must learn how to stop, breathe, think and observe
without constantly interjecting our own perspective.

That said, words are powerful tools.
Words are the magic spells you wish you knew
and as such, we must respect them and give them space.
Much like LSD:
the more you use them in rapid succession
the less potent they become to you.
The more callus our minds become.
The greater our tolerance becomes.
Diminishing returns are a bee-otch
when you want what you've already had.

Moderation is key.
847 · Apr 2015
Athens
A primary flaw of Democracy is the error of assuming popular opinion is in accordance with objectivity.

That's not to disrespect Democracy,
but to illustrate that People are fickle.
Think for yourself, but consider others.
Temperamental Heater; woke to a cold-*** bedroom
Broken Glass fell in the Garbage Disposal,
spent an hour fishing it out before it died;
A busted Water Pipe out front;
******* Kitten ***** behind every obstacle;

**** this Thursday.
**** this very day.
I've been awake for two measly hours
and already it's taking it's toll.

I hope work goes better than this morning has so far,
if things don't improve,
there shall be Metal.
Even if they do,
there shall be Metal
in lieu of physical violence.
Ok, now that I've vented some, I need a tall ******* glass of wine for breakfast.
The Challenge is, my veritable pantheon of followers,
is to describe thyself, without thy name,
in 6 stanzas
of your rhythmic, syllabic and linguistic choosing

Write these as your own poems
and link them to me in comments, below,
and I shall do the same as a separate piece
(when I get home from my show in Sacramento tonight)

Ye, who accepteth this, my humble Challenge
shall earn major kudos
and I shall be flattered and honored
and truthful, in turn, in mine.

I think this could be inspirational and communally entertaining and enlightening.
What sayeth thou, my friendly Fellows,
Will my Challenge be taken?
844 · Apr 2015
Balance
Sample size is invalid without complementary points of reference.
Use of Yin require finesse with Yang,
as action requires finesse with non-action.
It's at least as much about omission as addition.
The influence of negative space is profound.

Welcome to Taoist philosophy;
to astrophysics and psychology.
Welcome to symbology; mythology.

Welcome to Life.
May your stay be meaningful.
842 · Oct 2013
Carpe fucking Diem
Life will always discourage you
with slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
but you'd usually be far better off
telling the Adversity to go **** itself
(and writing that **** down!)
and continuing directly on
being who you know
you truly are;

Everything has flaws.
Everyone has flaws.

The only One
who is truly flawed
is the One who allows flaws
to dominate One's only Mind.

Little is ever ideal;
thus One had best learn to cope
and to make the very most
of the facilities One has available.

You're outrageously lucky
and so am I;
You sell yourself short
and so do I;
You have great potential
and so do I;

and thus I must say
to seize the ******* day.
We're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore

We've got the right to choose and
There ain't no way we'll lose it
This is our life, this is our song
We'll fight a 1000 legions
Don't pick our destiny 'cause
You don't know us, you don't belong

We're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore

Oh, you're so condescending
Your goal is never ending
We don't want nothin', not a thing from you
Your life is trite and jaded
Boring and confiscated
If that's your best, your best won't do

Whoa...
Whoa...
We're right, yeah
We're free, yeah
We'll fight, yeah
You'll see, yeah

Oh we're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
Oh we're not gonna take it anymore

Oh we're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
Oh we're not gonna take it anymore
No way!

Whoa...
Whoa...
We're right, yeah
We're free, yeah
We'll fight, yeah
You'll see, yeah

We're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore

We're not gonna take it, no!
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore

(just you try and make us)
We're not gonna take it
(come on)
No, we ain't gonna take it
(you're all worthless and weak)
We're not gonna take it anymore
(now drop and give me twenty)
We're not gonna take it
(a Pledge pin)
No, we ain't gonna take it
(on your uniform)
We're not gonna take it anymore
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9AbeALNVkk

This should be the National Anthem.
Dee Snider for president!
840 · Jan 2014
Daggers of Circumstance
Most occurrences
are innocuous enough
to provide a sort-of
false sense of security
such that,
when those other occurrences;
those, which send forth poison daggers
into the hearts of the otherwise Joyous;
rend in twain the velvet fabric of Comfort.

Take heed that the fleeting Comfort
doth indeed not lead to arrogance and entitlement;
for everything is permitted
on some fundamental level;
nothing is granted
in this Life.

Respect what you get
Respect what you lose
Respect what is
Respect what was
Respect what will be
840 · May 2015
Humility
Learn to swallow pride and apologize,
'cause it's not worth damaging relationships
to sate some ephemeral lust of Ego.
838 · Jul 2012
Echos of Chi
The echos of Chi
reverberate off the walls:
The Chi of my friends.

The echos of Chi:
After the vessel has passed,
the wake is still felt.

The echos of Chi
are as ripples in water.
Ricochet, Echo.
A series of Haiku style poems inspired by the echos of chi of my friends the day after hanging out with them.
837 · May 2013
Thunderstorms (New Music)
Anyone who is so inclined is urged to check out my newest track (still a work in progress):

https://soundcloud.com/apexparadigm/thunderstorms

The song is for my lover. She loves me(tal) and I love her. :3

It's in the key of E flat, in Dropped C# tuning.
begins in 6/4 time and dabbles with 7/4,
then ultimately ends in exclusively 7/4.

6 and 7 add to 13; the day of our Anniversary.
Yay for subtle numerology!

It's sort-of Math Metal.
If you've heard much Tool, you'll recognize some stylistic similarities.
Tool is a major influence on my style of composition as well as my perceptions of Music in general.

Comments and critiques welcome.
"Feed a man for free, and he'll be back for more.
Feed a man a bullet, and you'll never hear from him again."
835 · Oct 2013
Lyssa
The Love you say you seek
is not what you deserve
The Love you seem to need
is the kind you'd throw away
The Love you say you seek
does not deserve your Love, no
The Love you say you have
is not the Love you've handed out

But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again;

How the young
are so eager to drop their pants
and spread their legs
and call it Love;
They, who wouldn't know Love
if it held a gun right up to their heads.

But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again, Lyssa
But then again,
the closest Lyssa,
who am I to say?
Who- am- I- to- say?

**** others
**** the others;
and **** still others up;
tryin' to fill that void
from which you're on the run
inside

But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,

I think you confuse
Lust for Love and
Desire for Need;
or maybe it's that you're
so shallow,
so hollow
that they're one in the same
to you, Lyssa,
to you, Lyssa,
******* Lyssa,
*******.

But then again,
who am I to say?
But then again,
who am I to say that

The Love you say you seek
is not what you deserve
The Love you seem to need
is the kind you'd throw away
The Love you say you seek
does not deserve your Love, no
The Love you say you have
is not the Love you've handed out

**** others.
**** the others;
and **** still others up;
tryin' to fill that void
from which you're on the run
on the inside

Good luck, Lyssa
Good luck, Lyssa
Good ****, Lyssa
Good ******' luck, Lyssa
Lyssa is the Greek goddess of wrath, rage, fury, raging madness, and frenzy.

T'will be a song.. I woke up at 5 am and wrote it down.
828 · Oct 2014
Holiday for the Unliving
Life is a holiday for the Unliving.

Perhaps it is
as some have said:

Life is the pre-party for the Afterlife
(assuming such a thing even exists)

Though,
I suppose,
we oughtta live this life well, and now,
just in case
this really is
the only one.

If
ye find thy Shadow,
constantly embrace
the dark creativity,
not just once a year
when it's "okay."

Be not ashamed of thy Darkness.

Shame, fear, and guilt beget repression,
repression then begets pressurization,
and pressurization is akin
to explosion.

So.

Learn to appreciate it.
Learn to control it.
Learn to use it.

The Darkness is not bad,
t'is just like everything else:
t'is but what is made of it.

The Darkness is powerful
but only because we feed it
and don't allow it to breathe.

Live it. Express it.
It appreciates the respect.
Somewhere between my Taoist persona, my Anubis persona, and my Goth persona.
They work well together, I think.
826 · Jun 2013
Death can be such a tease
A sudden crescendo of dizziness,
no- more like a huge head rush;
Face goes numb.
Legs feel weak,
hands appear to be miles away,
cold sweat. Can't focus.
Unable to breathe comfortably.
Do I even still have a pulse?
Am I dreaming?

Everything starts slipping into Void;

Everything blurs together, slows down, echos...
first motions, then colors, finally sounds
and then there's the overwhelming urge the sleep.
To close my eyes and just let it all go.
To drift off.. as if downstream..
down the river of experience.

I fitfully try to think to myself:
is this how it feels to die?
Am I dying? Am I already dead?
Am I dreaming?
Have I been my whole life?
Am I waking up?

The calmest panic I've ever known:

I willingly let go
and slip downstream into nothingness,
but I keep snapping out of it;
So far, anyway.

Maybe my purpose is yet incomplete;
maybe I'm taking it too personally
maybe I'm just lucky,
or maybe I'm insane.

In any case,
Death can be such a tease.
825 · Apr 2013
Māyā
The All-Creative Godself,
in order to keep itself amused,
slips periodically and intentionally into a Dream
in order to stage a Play
wherein it plays all roles:

Actors, Plot, Context,
Script, Lighting, Director,
Author and Audience.

The Play of the Godself,
known as Māyā in Hindu Philosophy,
is the illusory perception of separation
of Ātman and Brahman;
of Self and Godself;
made so in order for the Godself to distract itself
from the fact that it plays all roles simultaneously and perpetually:

After all, if there is no apparent struggle for improvement of oneself and of the world at large,
nor winding and hidden path leading towards Enlightenment;
what is the purpose of the Play of the All-Creative Godself?
--
There is no boundary other than Perception
between Self and Godself.
824 · Jul 2013
Town Drunk
The local Mascot
for being drunk.
Sometime, we should drink together.
whether shots or a glass or beer.
Not too much, but also not too little;
Life is there to be lived.

Bring forth thy favorite bottles,
I'll bring thee hence mine.
We can compare and contrast;
tell tales of times past:

Drink of it and be merry,
though tread lightly, lest it drink of you;
for the Shadow of Dionysus
will drag One thence unto Doom.

We should drink together;
whether shots or a glass or beer.
We should toast to Life; to whatever;
to the Music of Reality! Here, here!

Bring forth thy favorite Bottles,
and I'll bring thee hence mine.
It truly isn't a matter of
"Cider, Cocktails, Brew, Liquor, or Wine?"

just bring forth thy favorite Bottles
and I'll bring thee hence mine,
and I'm confident that we all
can have a **** smashing time.
822 · Oct 2014
Outrageous Deviant
The only thing I find more enjoyable
than meeting outrageous expectations
is defying expectations outrageously.
821 · Nov 2014
Decisions
A good
spur-of-the-moment Decision
all too oft turns out better
than oh so many more
made with far too much deliberation.
Trust your instincts,
but don't rule out that you could be wrong.
good judgement
comes from experience
experience
comes from bad judgement
"The DMV is the biggest collection of idiots working for *******."
819 · May 2015
Wisdom as a Martial Art
Knowledge
is a term for trivia; information.

Humourless. Dark.
Static. Solid. Literal.
Earth.


Wisdom,* then,
is a sort-of *Martial Art of applied Trivia.


Humourous. Light.
Dynamic. Fluid. Symbolic.
Water.


Almost as if Yin and Yang!
-
Y'know, I gotta say: these patterns-
they're rather strangely.. *familiar..*
..are they not?

-
#suffermyhashtags
---------------------------------------------
It was slowly growing darker; the rain, more intense.
The sole idea of that distant cabin kept me going
as I traversed this wonderful jungle of a thicket
in awe of the sunset
so well juxtaposed by the downpour.

By now, the canopy was luminescent
with colors of dusk,
and I was hypnotized
by the sounds and smells
of this unusual deluge.
817 · Apr 2014
Selbstbegrenzung
Unsere grösste Begrenzungen
scheinen mir zu sein
die, auf welsche
wir uns begrenzen.
-
Our greatest limitations
seem to me to be
those to which
we limit ourselves.
Title: Self-limitation
Sprache ist ein komisches Ding:
Wenn man eine Sprache nicht spricht,
alles man liest oder hört
ist ganz und gar Egal;
doch wenn man die Sprache spricht,
ist alles umstritten und ist abhängig.
-
Language is a funny thing:
When one doesn't speak a Language,
everything one reads or hears
is totally equal, it's all the same;
but when one speaks the Language,
everything is controversial and dependent.
814 · Apr 2014
Lost Time
60 Seconds of Anger is
60 Seconds of Happiness
you've stolen from yourself.
814 · Apr 2015
It's all about the mindset
The only way to guarantee a 100% failure rate is not trying.
812 · Dec 2016
Comfort Zone
The Comfort Zone
is a beautiful place
but an infertile one
811 · Jul 2013
Monsanto buys BLACKWATER
... and people wonder how the world is so ******.
811 · Oct 2014
Reconsiliation
In the
uphill
struggle
of a soul...

..if
I have ever done ill,
it is only because
I have been ill.
Wrote this on the inside of a book on Zen I own. Funny concept, in itself.
810 · Apr 2013
Unmet Potential
I find it quite sad indeed
that with all of our mental and physical capacities
we have not yet the capacity for peace and harmony
on a larger scale of time or space,
but we have the wherewithal to engage in wars in the names of 'peaceful' gods for millennium.

**** this Humanity;
I think it's high time for a new one.
This one is too volatile and suicidal,
our form of diplomacy is a gun.
In everyday Life, just like in Mathematics,*
the idea
should be to *isolate and solve for variables,
not to increase the number of variables.

But, to answer my own question;

If you enjoy thinking analytically,
if you are a fan of Logic, and the power it holds,
you'll find yourself using that **** all the time.

It is magnitudes better
to humbly learn from those who came before you;
who, for the intellectual progeny of Humanity,
were considerate enough to record their wisdom
(once we figured out we could)
than it is to reinvent the wheel
every ten years
with each successive herd
of self-absorbed students.


However, that said,
it is vital to forge new ground.
It is necessary to reach out from History
in order to encounter anything new
from which we're doomed
to learn a thing, or a few.

The capacity to teach one's self
is a skill limited only by one's self.
The ability to learn from others
is truly a skill of nearly infinite wealth.
809 · Jan 2015
Humility [Learning]
Everyone
knows something
you do not,
so
shut the **** up
and listen;
you may just learn a thing or two.
But,
then again,
lots of people
are full of ****.
So,
tread lightly
but decisively.
808 · Apr 2014
Nuance
Subtlety is virtuous.
808 · Nov 2014
Write betweeen the Lines
It.




It is.


What is it?

That's just it:
it just is.

Fight it if you will.

Will
does have certain power that knows no known bounds,
but Will is nigh useless unless you act.

Action
can be a step in the wrong direction
if you don't stop to consider the implications of the choice.

Choice
is both a gift and a curse,
for we can never know with certainty.

Certainty
is a generalization for a particular probability
that we see to be in our favor.

Favor
is a slippery *****
inexorably leading to isolation.

Isolation
is what mind felt
when saw itself as the pilot of matter.

Matter
is frozen energy-
potential en potentia:

Potential.

Everything is potential.

Create the future you wish to reap.
Have the courage to blaze your own trail
if none you've found is as you desire;
there's nothing wrong with that:

It isn't selfish
to seek what it is for which your heart and soul cry out.
It isn't selfish
to refuse to follow a Path laid by another.
It isn't selfish
to pursue happiness;
rather, I find it to be quite the contrary:

If we all, independently, could bring about our own ecstasy
try to fathom what a rave life could be.

Puns may be intended;
ne'er forget to read between the lines-
read between the words themselves,
and look within them as well as thyself
for comprehension;
for understanding.

Words are such funny tools.
Such is a theme of mine.

Tools
be not at fault
for the evil that is so often wrought by them;
they are a catalyst; a medium:
a sort-of transmittal of intention:

A hammer can build or ****
with similar effort and ease
if only the Will is so inclined.

That is the boundless power of Will.
That is our responsibility as conscious beings.

One must seek construction of the Self,
rather than destruction of the Other.

For,
what is destruction of the Other
if not destruction of the Self
from the outside
in
?

(All off my questions are rhetorical and not.
Answer them. I dare you. They are my challenges.
Therein lies the journey to understanding the Self;
or, as they call it in academia: "Philosophy.")

I find that One finds what One seeks,
whether it is harmony or dissonance
or anything else in between.
(Or, maybe that's a product of my own bias!)

Thy every moment may differ,
but t'is of thy Path that I speak.

Tread lightly, my friend.

Only you can bear thy torch-
but, the true crux
is refusing to drop it
until you no longer require it.
I just sat down and wrote this. No forethought.
Lots of afterthought, though!
There's somethin' kinda 'zen' 'bout that:
if you will not actively seek meaning, you deserve it's absence.
It may sound harsh, but if you think about it, it likely doesn't apply to you.
Also, humor is a wonderful multi-key for the door of understanding.
;)
807 · Nov 2013
Capacity for Wrath
It can be important to have capacity for Wrath
but it's always important to not use it to it's full potential.
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