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Baazi-chan Jun 2019
I miss u so much
I wish
I could
Express these feelings
To you
But you said
I shouldn't cry
I should be strong
Therefore
I don't want to
Cry
Infront of u

I wish i could
Express this feelings
To you
But I'm scared
Of
What you will say
To me
Im scared
Cause i know
This
Will lead somewhere
Good
I know
But im afraid
For my uncertainties
Always takes over
Where emotions
Is concerned
Its my
Defense mechanism
From Love
To keep
My heart safe
For You
From Me
Baazi-chan May 2019
New found love?
Obsession?
What gives?
Can it be?
I'm over you?
Given
This feelings
I gained
For another...
No comment...
Confusion
Has taken over
Baazi-chan May 2019
This thought of you
Away from me
Gives tears in my eyes
Pains in my chest
Your touch
I wish to feel
The amazing times
I wish to revisit

The thought of you
Gives my thrills
Though my body
Wishing
you were here
Holding me
Wipes my constant tears
But when I wipe it myself
I realise you
You wont return
My window has closed
For now

What I do know...
My love for you
Is unfulfilled
Through
My love for you
Never got its due
It runs deeper
Then you can see
Giving you this
And receiving it back
Is all I wish for
From you...
To the one that I'll always love
- B
Baazi-chan Apr 2019
Me.
I don't ask.
For much.
But when I do.
I expect it to be done.

Am I wrong.
To do this.
Does it sound.
Selfish.
I wonder...

Been doing everything.
For others.
Most days.
Of my life.
With no gratitude.
Given.

Today.
My goodness.
Is not enough.
Am I so.
Enclosed.
For others to see.
I care.
I don't mind.

People throwing.
Lies.
Around like.
Old shoes.
Giving others.
Ammo.
To ruin.
What is a.
Simple life.
I live.

Don't be so.
Hostle.
They say.
Smile.
They say.
But little do they know.
The life I live.
Filled with ******.
I most times.
Can't endure.

Life Mona....
And that's all she wrote.
Baazi-chan Apr 2019
Thru I still think of us.
In the past.
I mask the pain.
With a smile.
The simplest way.
To keep sain.

Though you are in sights.
I resist from contact.
Through I know.
The consequences.
Of going back.

Here I stand...
Sit...
Lie...
With worry.
On my mind.
Did I do...
The right thing?
Of letting you go.
Letting you leave.
With no explanations.

Worry leaves me.
When happiness.
Overflow my being.
Through pretending to smile.
It became a reality.

All I wish now is.
For us to.
Never cross paths.
For that may.
Bring back.
The love.
I have.
Hidden away.
To all my past lovers. Each one has showed me love and gave me happiness for a while.
Baazi-chan Apr 2019
Stop thinking to much.
Keep your mind busy.
Forget all the thoughts
And the pain attached to them.
Remember the good.
In the present.
And past.
Baazi-chan Apr 2019
This feelings I feel.
Is unclear.
You confuse me.
With your unrelated silence.
I want to confess.
But.
I fear.
Your answer.
We speak in riddles.
Most days.
When it gets real.
I feel like running.

Real commitment.
Gives me chills.
We speak of flings.
We speak of real love.
We speak of all things.
Real life.
Nothing brings us apart.
But.
When feelings  gets.
Involved.
We fall apart.

Honesty may break our bond.
Our bond of friendship.
Risks.
Is it worth it.
Will the next step.
Break us down.
Or.
Build us up.
My master piece
For Waseem.
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