the smell of happiness it is no more
the stench of worry lingers the air
a wall of thorns covered with ugliness
holds a rose that use to be pure and white
but now is stained black with pain

plucked from it's tree is a
black rose withering slowly with
a fading perfume of true sadness
crying with its petals closed

eyes filled with hesitation
so soft to the touch yet so
dry like a sandy desert island
a soul that dreams just too much

pokking through the mind's crevices
covered in rust completely deep within
is a growing disease of emotions with
a heart that ticks but too full to beat
yet pumpimg slow is cold yet thin blood
this face is a fountain spraying out dust

a wall of distrust holds bricks burning
just like a fire thats has lost control
a stomp of hatred has just taken over every
part of this heart once filled of love

with no time to enhale it all in
a soft and warm yet crying soul
is dripping wet with darkend fear
strangled by the tightened barbwire
cutting through each and every petal
leaving behind scars with shreds of pain
covering every inch of this garden of hell

Colors are gift by almighty
The precious gift given prudently

          seems so pretty to me

Black presents color of night
Darkend and unique you can hide from sight.

        Seems so pretty to me

Purple is the finest color from kit
As flowers wear this as its perfect fits.

        Seems so pretty to me

Pink is color for baby girls
As they match there cute and lovely curls.

       Seems so pretty to me

Green is color of grasslands bright
A color which strengthens the eye sight.

      Seems so pretty to me

Autumn brings brown and red along.
Covering the ground with leaves long.

      Seems so pretty to me

Birds are also the instance of colors lively
Carrying twice or thrice shade collectively

         Seems so pretty to me

Inside the sea ,fish and creatures muatully
Swimming with hundred colors benevolently

      Seems so pretty to me

Gratitude to allah for the eye
To see a domed rainbow extending in the sky

      Seems so pretty to me

Thank you creator for this gift
Beauty that inspires heart to uplift

      Seems so pretty to me....

And the scars you  call  sovaneirs that mark your
arms and haunt your dreams.
The canvas tattred at times.
belongs to a tortured artist it seems.

Beatings breed the monster none will ever know.
Cast into the emptyness as a child.
Cries fell apon deaf ears screams in need of a direction
to go.

No photos or memories past do I
tressure.
the outcast understands the truth.
And does reside with the pain of plessure.

And the wicked will always find.
A subject so innocent.
For the weak are always left behind.

Blood apon the hands secrets eat at the soul
like a cancer.
Insanity has no reason.
Questions are asked for which i have no answer.

From chaos ive risen to bury that ghost.
Taken a form of a clown.
trapped within a prison this shell is but
a tempary host.

underneath the laugther it always does exist.
Passed of in conversations
Im fine I always insist.

It's no worry it's only a part time
lessure.
In the emptyness of my darkend soul.
I know the true pain of plessure.

a blackend cloud on a darkend day blow wind blow this gloom away
feel the cloud touching out feel its power feel its clout
cotton candy so they look yet pure danger evils touch

blow wind blow my thoughts away leave me clean for today
give my soul some peace for once give it feedom give it love
charge my mind with happy days fight the fire damp the blaze

clean me out so i can see ..see a future ,happy free

this is what we'll be
when our faiths deferred
bent with no freedom
for the caged bird

our eyes will roll like maddend stallions
we'll blunder in a crooked step
for this is the work of our fathers
this is their regret

we should have had gratitude
and bended our knee
but we broke the order
plunged into the sea

atonment comes from
a far away place
for we're terrified of triumph
sunshine on our face

self loathing is spiteful,
it darkend the pain
we're all so lost,
Gods love in vain

now that we're finished
I am sure to say
our revelation is over
as dusk breaks the day

raindrops in the eyes
thunder in the mouth
I see rage mounting like snowfall
from east, north, and south

drift away, drift away, drift to the sky
now we know the scriptures no lie
drift away, drift away, drift to the sky
we chose our fate, now we die

My silent screams go unnoticed
My darkend days unchecked
I wish they believed me when i said it did happen
The emptiness is all consuming
It stole away my breathe
Self harm is always an option
Sucide is wish
That wouldn't happen to me
Because even death has rejected me
The memories of being suffocated by the man you called dad totures my head every minute
But now....
I got nothin to say
My words ran away with my happiness

Her eyes were darkend pools
of twisted torment.
Her lips were broken lines
of lovely lies.
Her chest was tight and cold
from her heavy hardened heart.
And her legs were
Slender sticks of secret scars.

-ARI

Looking out into forever,
to the vast lands and open skies.
Her mind continues to stray,
to her reflection always watching her.
She cant seem to go far enough away
From the saddend lips and darkend eyes.
She tries,
she always tries to forget,
To erase the past that haunts her.

-ARI

Your lives are much sweeter than mine,
triumphs mixed with parties,
action and crowds.

I can hear it when you speak up
despit your fear, agony, youth, or depression,
at least you drive
finding someone
or you paint your lips with color
smacking them on the cheek of a compadre.

You drink crap beer or wine
maybe you even smoke.
Vices.
Mine are long gone,
sacrificed.

You visit darkend, pulsing clubs
people know you
they even come up
honestly glad to see you,
you are embraced.

Fight or flight button upgrade in process,
pleas,
beggings,
wait. Wait and see. Selah. Wait...

there. The next para-digm pop, you opt for geotime mode...
think
I am a rock... not the whole song, at this speed that takes a mortal ever.

Hyper awareness arousal, slow and steady mode...

startle response seen in squirrels and lizards and me, the re
sponsor of what... ? nada,
oftener than not.

The trigger is a ***** from a point being ig-nored in ignoble folly
iggie popped a bubble,
iggie lived an ugly life at the same time as earth was living an ugly life,

pop aster risc pop star ish pop

horse feathers as a load, ye gotta tote that bale, bher the forbidden burden.

Ye never read? Is that the message ye come t' judge. Will ye find me those winged
messengers of old, mercurial bherers of points in the right way
popping boundaries to progress, in time,

laughing at the rock I imagined I am, or am I?
Am I the rock Sisyphus rolls?

the time scale has wobbled,
ever just threatend to end free will,
-- is this suicidal imagination killing its own self?---
you can't die if you want to.
Not here.
Up the road a bit there is a bridge. Sure thing. For normals, who
never been this far before.

Would that be Sylvia Plath paying me back
for knowing nothing of the effect her work had on
the message McLuhan got...

next generations are pre-enabled to be skeptical,
the medium is the message,

resonating into ever, since October 27, 1954...

singing- chorus of smallworld voices

Soaring strings... whennn you wish
upon
a star, makes no difference where you are...

the
first American Television
generation with unformed frontal cortices in 1954,

sang that song, in their hearts, and truly,
wished on Venus, often,
that supposed to be the wishing star,
all things considered
combining into les confused knots
Pinochio/Tinkerbell dust/ Magic wand

the besom, broom, for sweeping up destruction,
Fantasia ai ai ai
was animated. We saw it with children's eyes,
in darkend rooms that poured
our mass attention into the massive window
staring into the windows of our souls,


---- the effect of truth
---- war loses its honor, its only supposed reason.
---- war it self crumbles under truth flowing in the at most fears
---- made superficial, top ply, last layer losing wind

breathe, soft yes, nothing is funny any more. Ah ah ah waht if
it always was a literal joke...
high brow,
a maze, to entertain life... in 2020 there is tech for this.

We have access to survivor networks of every imaginable ilk.
Meditations on truth, owmmm what is going on gonggggg

And they are off, all the fears and doubts and unbelievable lies
into the stretch
intendere
sistere

pop to Sysiphus Happy Now

Massive multi player game, where all non-player characters
lack masks, they do not play, the masked ones play for them, in the spirit
of
truth
told so suddenly y'gut jumps,'n' sphincters clinch...

simultaneous release of un belief, opening
empty knowledge boxes lined
with cedar, for the smell,

hope, in my chest, where my trea-sure things are.

My grandmother, the idea of her, her life was happy, as far as I knew.
Now, I know she was a  final model of mental upgrades
to the enregizing system we all share,
at v.1.0 white of the egg dna,
some 120 kya a[kilo years ago}... there have been upgrades and repairs

to many lines of YMRCA's since she wombed her way into
our family history,

it must be quite a story, if we can imagine mito mom mighta had a whole

dreamtime life where she snipped the thread of all the other wives,

a vision, she says I see, and I see I say, this is the way

prophecy woiks, woopsie daisy jes' dropptabebe, do a li'l dance,

weep 'n' moan, what could be woice, than a cajun gramma lover voice?

singin' sweet by and by
so long no longer means a thing,

things being what they are, and we being mere words, working
through true trauma beings

lining up for gratulation, grace for grace, eye to eye.
Bad guys lose, good guys win.

_ like I said, there will be times you must start over..
_ but the game goes on.

You sell your soul
For a taste of acceptance
With muse in hand
You slam, without repentance.
Colors bleed thru
And paint a darkend hue.
So light can shine?
So light can shine.
Such blinded eyes.
He lies in truth.

I want to celebrate
Being alive
Running and free across darkend streets
Between the humdrums lines of conformity
Right down the path of most resisitance
I want to be wild
I want to taste the world in my mouth
Feeling its beating pulse down my throat and across my skin
To touch stars and feel their burn

Carry on little phenox, spred light on the darkend hearts of man. Dont look back look foward and fly. Fly like a commet that lights up the night sky. Carry on little phenox, carry your light 'till the end.

I try to speak
I'm choked from within
Each of my compassions
Haunts me as my sin
Like darkend fog
Gently crashing in the brook
You should know by now
I'm a pig on a hook

Sticky

I crossed your darkend path
And felt how …
sticky you were.
Roped with irritations
Everything… just clinging.

I watched you
Unknowingly chase
The tail that is your own
Amused..
Like a juvenile.

Unable to shed
your malignancy
…of choice
Everything is your trigger
Clock waits… loudly.

******* blame
You remain..
Wide eyed
Looking for reason
To explain affect.

The presence of you
Films me..
I step away..
And brighten.

Tf 2/2016

Day. A sunny day
Masked shadows arise
Eager to devour
The bitter potion is spelled
All shadows dispel
Awful taste engulf the air
A heart in tears
Day. A darkend day
I won't go astray...
At least... not today

..KidDo.

The flame of orange reflections stay married with the darkend shore the grey clouds paint lifes backdrop of fate the crawling sea can only roar.the world is on fire igniting the sands leave the earth come take my hands a different view another way but deep inside i know ill stay.this closing tide will cure my weakness your healing salt will be my sweetness as for all lifes anchient creatures whos bones in dust create the world into the greatest winds that we are hurled .

The limous crud creeping in cracks, as light departs,
Shattered vocals below drowning eyes,
Each breath as though it were the last, Suffocating Alive
I'm buried deep inside a dying heart,
Anguished peaces torn apart, moments couldn't catch their breath, Heart frozen in continuous bewilderment,
Darkend halos enveloping lacerated lamenting hearts, set imprisonment in between their puzzled parts, The iris immersed in a roaring ocean

You ****** me in you made me feel i could live again.  
I played the fool thinking i could trust another man.
But you played the cards and you played the so well i couldnt see that i was loosing myself.
I was so blinded By your lies and your charm i failed to see you were causing me harm
You grabbed my hand and lead me astray taking me down a path where i lost my way
You left me so lost my mind so confused youve darkend my soul that was already bruised

How could i be such a fool to love  someone as selfish as you
How could i follow you down a track where i couldnt find my way back
How could i loose everything  relying on chance
hypnotized By love i was stuck in a trance
How could you be so sadistic so deceiving and so cruel
To treat a women like that and then play the victim the fool

You flamed my heart with promises and lies you got the fire burning but the fire always dies
I got in too deep and relised there's no where to turn
So i followed you deeper into the pitts and you left me there to burn.
My life turned to ashes my soul turned to dust
My head fried in pieces my heart turned to rust.