why are you acting differently as if
i broke your heart
why are you making it look like
i'm the one to suggested that
we take some time apart?

you loved to shift the blame and play your little silly games
i should've seen this coming
that's just like any boy, you too would start running

you told me that i was your anchor,
that i kept you grounded
and whenever you were alone
my love always made you feel you surrounded

but then i failed to see that
i was sinking and drowning
in a pool of my own blood
from the scars you caused when you told me i wasn't the one

I want to take a moment to apologize
For trying to make you bear the weight of my personal trauma.
At the time,
It seemed easier to blame you than to admit the cold hard truth of the situation.
This was something that would forever change me,
Yet I tried to change you as well
And that was not fair to you.
The weight was mine to bear alone.
I forgive you for not knowing how to deal with the situation or how to comfort me.
Only time could do that.
I apologize for demonizing you for not being able to handle it,
The trauma was too great for anyone to ever comprehend.
I apologize for saying awful, demeaning words because I was hurting emotionally,
What I said I can never take back.
But most of all,
I forgive you for leaving
I wish you nothing but the best this world has to offer.
~sdr

If  I die it was always -----. I'd chose her til the day I die. I wish she were a boy. So we could do it right.

When I love, I love big
You ask for pebbles and I give you mountains
Ask for a match and I will give you a wildfire

When you saw me you asked for my company
I gave you my heart
You A
Asked for a night and I offered you a lifetime

I gave you an ocean when you asked for a puddle and that big problem in that

Is I never asked if you could swim

you appeared like the wind passing by,
and stayed for a little while,
but will probably never return.

just like that
my smile fell like the waves,
except it never rose again




f.t

I remember the rain
the feels
how I love it.

I remember that many rainy
afternoons with you
how I love it.

I remember you
how I’ve loved you.

I remember naps with you
God, your arm
         my arm
         your leg
         my leg.
Can we go back there?
Even if just for one day?

You see
my heart was bursting then
and I can still feel it now,
in the same way that I can still smell the salt
on your skin.

If I have ever held your hand, know that I still hold it in my heart
If I have ever dried a tear from your cheek, I still feel it on my skin.
If you’ve ever burned me- I still remember the warmth before the pain.
Change the locks, I still hold the old keys to every place I once called home.
I can never bring myself to understand why we make strangers from ex-lovers
We mourn for the death of who we wanted those people to be,
And lie to ourselves when asked if we broke our own hearts.

A month from now i will barely remember his name. i won't think about how he tastes or how his body moves above mine. A month from now i would have replaced him with a man whose face rivals his and whose tongue knows how I like my **** teased. A month from now his existence will mean nothing but a month before that his existence means something.