it’s that time of year again
a time for re-evaluation

my gratitude awards
go to ...

disinterest in material things
those who see better values
cultivated kindred spirits
kindred strangers
who are yet to be met
a comfortable life
the cliff, the trees,
the creatures, the seas,
the music
the things i can do
and the freedom to do them
and the love
that was shared
this year

humanity at play
all on display
sun salved souls
play out their connection
under a soothing sun
mum and daughter
mum and dad
master and dog
boyfriend and girlfriend
surfer and surfboard

out of our living rooms
away from the fumes
satisfying our want
dealing with sand and salt

with a variety of competence

local or tourist
turkey or purist

it’s all ok
it’s a lovely day
humanity is out to play
and on display

we once were
weren’t we?
oh how we could have
been more?
different now though
happy with our paths
who knows
where we would be?
still that lingering
possibility
that more was there
i am now here
you are there
impossible
to compare
Still with
all the love
in our lives
there’s that
undying
spark still
in the embers

sometimes i’m shocked
by the smallness of my world
at times something happens
that spotlights my ignorance
and i don’t worry

because knowing all
will never be
and knowing that
just reminds me

how what we know
is ever
in philosophical doubt

and what we know, we don’t know
is massive, multiple and manifold

and what we don’t know, that we don’t know
that unfathomable black hole
really can’t matter

leaving me in a state
of delirious mysterious wonder
accepting happily
that there is much to ponder

but there is no hurry
so what me worry

swim around my head
they float in and out like clouds
emerging in the morning light
shedding subconscious shrouds

they cruise like languid fish
among hopes and fears
among anxieties and demons
among the loves and tears

they are dragged into order
to face the day’s demand
they are harnessed into logic
but they are criminals on remand

they are human nature vagabonds
we try to steer them through
suspicion fear and rivalry
to enlightenment brand new

i love their feral ways
they challenge us every day
the are random and wild
they keep us in the fray

again time
has moved on
without my permission
leaving me here
older
and full of wonder
about
what I don't know

sometimes I stop at you
and look
with eyes of grateful wonder
your spirit still all shiny
yet you are still here with me

yes  some things aggravate
but why should they, if unsurprising?
they shouldn't really get to me
it's  your different way of singing

well-seasoned are my campaigns
i've loved and lost a few
i come with all my baggage
to be here with you

i think that I am blessed
and live by this adage
happy with a playful angel
not being unaccompanied baggage

east of the sunset
stands our house
there and west of the dawn
are seven seas
to sail our ships
for we are the vagabonds
I believe in the wonder

what is it about water
so calming and meditative?

spent most of my life looking at it
bringing on muse and contemplation

watching the flow lines
of surfers at wave play
or

gazing at
the ancient river red gums
bowing to the muddy Murrumbidgee
in reverent silence

and now watching
the flowing gutters
and umbrella parade
over a beer
in a Newtown bar

water makes me wonder
in a peaceful way
of the beauty in the world
like the dancing air-borne plastic bag
in American Beauty

whaddayoudo
between fast food and poo
of benefit to this earth
what is left
or are you bereft
of any contributing worth

you accelerate too fast
and squander the stuff
that took millions of years to make
what do you think
in the din of your doof
as you take and take and take

are you nuts
to leave a trail of butts
and grunting diatribe
dropping your empties
what were you thinking
it's just such a bad vibe

you sneer an swear
and put smoke in the air
and criticise all that’s arty
you adopt talk of the street
and a derivative beat
as you fight for your right to party

whaddayoudo
between fast food and poo
that is of redeeming worth
whaddayoudo
that would be fine and true
that's of benefit to this earth?

we all remember
where we were
watching the towers
burn and fall
knowing that things would
never be the same at all
disbelief at first, or
had an action movie
slipped into the news

no, it was real
and then twenty years
of vengeful repercussion
of military posturing
of suffering for many
we watched
the baddies being painted
good and evil
being redefined
virtue confused
impotence and power
conflated
lies and spin
consecrated
truth
alternated
idiot rich guys
promoted
tax for the poor
promulgated
democracy
desecrated
climate destruction
accelerated
by denialist
complacency
inequality
more concentrated
goodness and morality
infiltrated

by posturing political
pus weasels
venal vultures
of self interest
grasping for
short term dominance

and then ..
complacency pervaded
as absurdity
was accepted
as our new state of normal
and the height
of compassion
was owning a dog
and tut tutting
as refugees marched
across our news screens

and now we
bemoan being isolated
from being contaminated
we are mostly relegated
to stay in our mansions
while dinner is contemplated
have you been vaccinated?

where is hope
in this cluster **** world
we are just powerless disciples
of distrust and suspicion
of our systems and overlords
a bunch of anonymous souls
who have learnt
to question everything
emboldened by our
social media alliance
we are a coalition of suspicion

but a cluster **** of suspicion
will be no salvation

hope is
people doing the things that they love
things they believe in
being humble warriors
of self determination
helping each other
in compassion and grace
and in so doing
showing others that
there are good people
in the world
because we are all
just people together

time to stop
hunker down
withdraw
think
reflect
celebrate silence
hibernate
conserve
hug
roast
contemplate
regenerate
sleep­
dream
breathe fresh air
enjoy winter
the quiet season

Lately I feel
I am being crushed
between tectonic plates
of Impossibility

The advice of those around
contradictory and senseless
The constraints offered
leave no possible solution

Then I see
that it's not me
The game they gave
has no salve

I'm in the wrong game
This game is actually
Theirs