As I was calling things you that weren't that hurtful such as ******* and ****,  I had realized I had used those far too often and had resorted to a plain "*******". I needed a new angle on the aspect of insults within boundaries. While my need to make you feel inferior raged on I look in the thesaurus to find alternatives to the words I have already used. Of course they didn't have ******* or **** with a list of synonyms. So I decided to look at plain "mean", as I was looking at the synynoms nothing really described what I wanted to put in your brain that you already knew. I glanced over at the antynoms and they were "compassionate, kind, nice, noble, sympathetic"

     An antynom to mean was sympathic
An antynom to mean is sympathetic
Sym pathetic
Sym.       Pathetic.
You are pathetic with your words to show compassion, kindness, niceness, and nobleness to me. ME. You are not a ******* or a *******, a deadbeat or a waste of space, immature or childish, selfish or conceded. You in fact lack the ability to be sympathetic towards me, not totally apathetic. But just unsympathetic to **** me the *******. And you do it so well.

my heartbreak is
an exquisite
python

veins purple and
all the parts see
and all the parts feel

and something
sweeter than *****
or deeper than
crimson

and all the stars
and all the scars

a beautiful map
i feel a
circle in
the center

pulling tightly
in, like the
invisible ***
the transit
of a sin
wife of
melancholy

overt the
sublime and
aftertaste
blow the
smoke out and
smite me
bite me
fantasize me

even the outside
obtrudes
and is
generally inspired

it is my
graduation
*******

the horse of
the hegemony
has let us go

i don't know if
he's hiding in
the yellows

or riding
the green grass

and each
shadow whisper falls
in a cylone of
wit and reverie

a world of your choosing
a tower of
ecstasy spikes
and cloudless
sisterhawks roll

i can see where all the words
are supporsed to be
but you must trust me
even if some of the letters are wrong

sympathic geometry
when the sounds
come out nice

and i can see the
depth of
my treachery and it
is wild and blue.

Music background:  
Mendelssohn Violin Concerto no.2.
Figure: two beggar sisters
Background: autumn, double rainbow, butterfly, accordion, birds, horses, cattle, and sheep
Scene: a large meadow
___
Not far from the painter’s window
two beggar
sisters sitting in a large meadow
He whistles the birds’ melody,
the distant mountain,
he sees horses and cattle lowing,
after thunderstorm, autumn day
The painter silently watches the two sisters
Has she finished playing and dropping her little accordion without noticing?
Will her sister tell the blind girl double rainbows in the darkening sky?
Wind heavily blowing at the worn-clad pair
And he sees the red haired blind girl gently hold her sister
Can you tell me of these autumn colours?
The painter sees the  double rainbow across the eastern sky
He swiftly sketches through the window
He paints his heart  sympathic love
Will the blind girl feel joyous like yellow?
Perfumes dark green,
vibrant like red enrich their hope
Where the double rainbow appears in the eastern sky
The painter paints his inner calm,
butterfly tranquil mauve.

I think I’m a Bhuddist
Because I’m catholic
Look it up

I think I’m humanist
because I’m sympathic
It’s what’s up

I think I’m a pugilist
Fight the fight fantastic
Loving cup

For skeptics synchronicity
Is mere Chance
The law of very large numbers

For others
It's like Irish dance
And sympathic Polish plumbers

For me, I'm not sure
It happens
But what does it mean?

I certainly am not pure
But I do
Like the wearin'  o' the Green

And some Stranger Things
I indeed have seen.

              (starting in summer
                            2015.             )