so long  so painful this journey
to surrender myself anew like a bud full of tension
recognize you, reinvent the rituals of sensing
I weep in front of the threshold of spring  
between eros and thanatos an excessive tenderness
I am well prepaired for the erosion of time in my hair
poetry and reality facing each other in my hands
I do not hope do not despair do not wait for grapes to wonder
it's just the taste of it,  the feel of it, this quality of the infinite
that makes me look at you with androgynous complicity

she called out and i followed the sound
through thorns and past snakes till she was
found
she reached out and i held her hand
i pulled her out and helped her stand
i dusted of her clothes
and prepaired her warm bath
i did let her drink from my mouth
the first time i looked in to her eyes
i knew that its in there that i will lie
she was beautiful past any word description
she was my only with no other option
i find myself loving her with a great affection
to her mine was a forever devotion
from the woods she came and became my
world
there is nothing that for her could not do
she made me the best i could been
she was my best the most pretty the world had
ever seen
when she talked i used to listen
with attention i found herself that was hidden
she told me her life secrets
those that made my brand *Top Secret

You are Born for a reason
in a set time and place,
Yet you sit their thinking..
Why am I in this place?..

You have a past an future
An you live in the present,
That only you can change
You cant go an exchange..


You cant see yourself in
every word people say
Dont be discouraged
Were theirs a will theirs a way..

Dedicate yourself an youll find yourself
Your one of a kind, Irreplaceable..


Your never gonna know if you never try
Dont listen to the critic's they all lie..

You have to have determination
That your goals your only location,
In trying theirs no limitation
To get to your destination


You came along way from where you began, look at you now...
You survived all this..

The past made you stronger
Prepaired for situations,
What dosent **** you
Makes you stronger..

Your equipted with your secret weapon
Effectively trained for when life has its strains..

Build a foundation for you
An encourage nations..
Overcome your douts
Just eliminate them..

Your better then you think
You dont just take.up space
You help in so many ways..
But dont relize all the ways..

You are loved by more then just me
You know.you are not weak..

Get a change.of mind
A grasp of real.life..
Become the better you
An do the best you can do.

Sickness often comes to us
And there are times we're in dispare
But there's a day that's coming
When when we won't have a care
The sting of death will all be gone
A new song we shall sing
When we cross over Jordan
Our new life will begin
Oh to look upon his face
And see his nail scared hands
I can't wait to see it all
When I reach that promised land
So make your reservations
Get prepaired to go
It's a one way flight to Gloryland
It's in your future...Just so you know
We all must make the journey
For this life one day will end
And your soul will be required of you
Its just the beginning ...Its not the end

Some days I just lye awake
I don’t know why or how nothing I can ever take to get rid of this feeling
There’s nothing I do I’m trapped in my own mind in own time I just rewind reflect I need to be checked my mental status is on a new apparatus
That is just how it is and it will be forever me but I can’t explain that I’m in love with the feeling that I will never get better no matter the weather out side it’s always cloudy in my brain I feel like I’m in sane and I love it I cry I’m depressed re obsessed with the way my mind thinks that it’s ok to be this way but this is how I see the day on the daily and lately I thought I was mapping it out turns out i was farther from the truth then I have ever been and this I’ve already seen. Been there done that I’m done with this crap i wish it was over but I can’t end the pain that keeps me alive because if I’m not in it I don’t know, who am I

You ever look up and feel the sky
Try to think can’t find a single reason why,
Are you dead and or alive
Like what’s inside
All that hard ****, ******* know we tried but never had the best of times
Always looked for the light though we felt it die each try  
It’s written down now get in the ground
This is the sound of repression now
Sound cloud rapper with depression how stereotypical, slip knot music video while I slit my wrists how sick is this
How twisted do I need to get
Enough to feed the fit
Get me too get treated
I can’t help it I got a disease
****** up mentally
Forget my recipe

This is the way it was  not how it has to be how could we passively self destruct our own lives and not know it **** few more and would’ve blown it when I’m angry I just throw it, it’s just how I go through it, just how I knew it , blows up in my face every time shows up in every rhyme don’t know why just so angry it pains me I’m flaming at the the top prepaired  for that massive drop,  beat hit needle on the record. Calm and wreck less like twin injections this complextion got your head re derectin in every wich way checkin
For my flexin, hit the motor plex an decide to keep right, right where I want you i own you I pown  you
I guess you got to wake up to invent you’re own destiny
Formulate a plan become lyrical Peter Pan  
Got you lookin like a meter man
Now I know your not man made  
Put down this charade Or you’re gonna need clinic aid
Written spitten pain


Guess I’m just a rap guy
Guess I’m just a sad guy
Guess I’m just a mad guy
Guess I’m not a good guy
Guess I’ll say good bye

I'm writting a poem again here I am
laying on the bed now, laptop in my hand
I wanted to say thank you for all, once again
And I wanted to say I'm blessed yes, again and again

So many things have happend so fast So quick
But who should I thank, will you say "pentru nimic"?
From all the good days which one should I pick?
Until tomorrow comes, tonight will be quiet- tick

I have a part in me that's worried and scared
A part that's there and does go no where
A small piece laying within alone, spared
Its like my mind always says, "be prepaired"

But the good in the world doesn't let me stand behind
The good in us is so beautiful, im not blind
I know we can be better together combined
And our future awaits for us aligned.